


The Expansion of Two Natures

by innerslytherin, severity_softly



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Divorce, F/M, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:42:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 78,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22188826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/innerslytherin/pseuds/innerslytherin, https://archiveofourown.org/users/severity_softly/pseuds/severity_softly
Summary: When Aaron Hotchner is new to the BAU, he finds himself working closely with SSA David Rossi--one of the original founders of the department. As their relationship progresses, they realize what they have together is more than friendship...but circumstances keep them from having all that they knew they could have together. Years later, Dave has a second chance, just when Aaron needs a friend the most...
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/David Rossi, Aaron Hotchner/Haley Hotchner
Comments: 15
Kudos: 126





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> RP format. Mild AU, as we played fast and loose with Hotch's already screwy back story (especially in regards to his work history and the timeline of his marriage to Haley).

_"Love is the expansion of two natures in such fashion that each include the other, each is enriched by the other." - Felix Adler_

If you were to ask Aaron Hotchner, he might tell you that saying he knew he was right were he belonged the very moment he walked into the BAU was grossly romanticizing the point. There were worries and apprehensions with every new job, and Haley had hardly been happy with the idea of moving to Virginia or with Aaron leaving SWAT and the Bar Association for the FBI. Still, she'd agreed to join him there soon because she loved him, and she wanted him to be happy. And while Aaron didn't walk into the bullpen absolutely sure this was going to be where his heart would reside for the rest of his career, he had a pretty good inkling that was probably the case the moment he saved his victim.

"You did good work." Dave Rossi wasn't a man who was free with his praise, but he never stinted when he thought it was merited. And from the moment he'd met Aaron Hotchner, he'd been impressed with the man--for a lot of reasons, not just that he was gorgeous and eager. Aaron was passionate about right and wrong, and completely in love with the law. It was a beautiful thing, and his dedication to protecting people was impressive.

Dave dropped his bag on the desk he was now sharing with Aaron _and_ Roy Conover and took the chair. Aaron was the 'rookie', he could stand for a few minutes.

"Thanks," Aaron said. He knew it was ridiculous to feel as good as he did, given the case they'd just come off of, but he knew he looked a little too pleased, even if he wasn't actually smiling. He tilted his head at Dave for a moment, and then dragged a chair over from another unoccupied desk. He knew the type of guy Dave was--even if the men he knew in his previous profession might not have been as crass as David Rossi could be sometimes--and he wasn't entirely sure he liked Dave very much yet, but he was willing to give this a try.

Dave smirked, amused. "Pretty satisfied with yourself, aren't you?" he teased. He shook his head. "Better hope they'll allow our profile as evidence in the courtroom. Not much precedent for that yet." He couldn't help trying to needle Aaron a little; he was so damn _eager_ Dave was surprised the kid hadn't been labelled a 'blue flamer'. Still, he was also damn likeable for some reason.

Aaron arched an eyebrow--it wasn't so much that he was pleased with himself, as it was that it felt good to be on this side of the case--and shifted down in his seat a little. He inclined his head, his expression going a little more serious. "I think there's plenty of evidence to build a strong case, though I've heard Glatzer is already preparing to defend him, so whoever's prosecuting is going to have a battle." He shook his head. The case wasn't yet five hours old, and their unsub already had the best sleazebag attorney Aaron knew of.

Dave nodded. "That can be the frustrating part, catching the unsub while not screwing up the court case afterward." He stretched, then glanced at Aaron. "You called that pretty wife of yours to tell her we're back in town yet?"

Aaron laughed and shook his head. "No. Haley and I aren't married, actually. And she's still tying up loose ends at home before she makes the move." He was sure Dave had just assumed Aaron was already married, given his age. It wasn't something Aaron hadn't heard other people assume a million times over, especially given how long he'd been with Haley. "I'll call her when I get home."

"Not married yet? Someone else'll snap the girl up, especially with the hours you're going to be keeping from now on," Dave said. "Trust me on that," he added, thinking of his ex-wife Kay. She hadn't liked the hours he spent away from home, especially when the end of the Hoover era meant women were moving up in the FBI ranks. Too many pretty women at work, too many hours away from home, and Kay was suddenly spending a lot of time with her tennis coach. Dave hadn't contested the divorce, and she'd been nice enough to leave him the cat.

"For all intents and purposes, it's been a de facto marriage for years, even if Georgia doesn't recognize common law marriages." He shifted and glanced at Dave. "I probably will." Haley wanted to get married anyway, in spite of knowing that Aaron had never been too keen on the idea, and he knew once she was here in Virginia, her insistence was only going to get worse.

Dave raised his eyebrows. "You don't sound exactly thrilled about it," he remarked. He glanced at his files, then at his watch. "Want to grab something to eat, since we've both got empty houses to go back to?"

Aaron shrugged. "Sure," he said, quick to let the topic of marriage drop. Honestly, he wanted to go home and shower, but it never hurt to be friendly, considering he'd be working with Dave now.

"There's a great little bar up north a little ways. I can't remember where you said you'd found a place, but if it isn't out of your way, the burgers are great." Dave _could_ cook, but he didn't do it much. Didn't seem to be much point, since it was just him. Eating out was easier, anyway.

"No. No, it's not out of my way." Aaron _was_ mildly surprised that Dave was offering to go to dinner with him. He heard many things about Agent Rossi already, and none of them were rave reviews of Dave's people skills.

Dave nodded and stood up. "Great. I'm definitely in need of a cold beer. Just follow me."

Dave liked to drive fast, but Aaron didn't seem to have any trouble keeping up. Not that Dave would admit to being impressed by something like that. He wasn't. Really.

When they were settled in a booth at the bar, he stretched his legs out, letting them brush Aaron's lightly. "So what does the Not-Mrs.-Hotchner think of your new career?" he asked.

Aaron shifted slightly at the touch to make room for Dave and shrugged. "She's not thrilled about moving. I don't think she's thrilled about the FBI either." He glanced at their waitress when she brought their beers, and nodded his thanks. "Then again, you're a lot less likely to get shot in the courtroom, so I can see her point."

"Not quite as rewarding to spend your life in the courtroom, either," Dave replied. He took a long sip of beer and mentally classified Aaron as 'mostly straight, but not hopeless'. "Does she have a career?"

Aaron shook his head in agreement, but didn't bother to tell Dave that was exactly the reason Aaron had gone into the FBI. "She's a teacher. High school," he said. "She's finishing out the rest of the semester before she makes the move."

"Makes sense. She must like kids. Got any plans to have some?" Rossi hadn't been ready for kids when Kay was. They might be nice, it was the sort of thing you did, getting married and having kids, but he wasn't sure if he ever wanted any of his own.

"She likes her job," Aaron said, and took a long sip of her beer. "Teenagers and children are a different beast, aren't they?"

"Sure," Dave said. The new guy had some things to learn about avoiding questions and working with profilers. Dave let it drop anyway. "Didn't have any with my first wife," he said. "I wasn't a very good husband. Too many hours away from home." The waitress came back with their food and he thanked her absently.

Aaron nodded, but he wasn't sure he liked the direction this conversation was taking. It felt a little like Dave was warning him about something. He took another drink and dug into his food. "Are you remarried?" Aaron hadn't seen a wedding ring or heard that Dave was married, but it was easier to ask that than address the topic at hand.

"Oh, eventually," Dave said. He shrugged. "There's a cute clerk upstairs, name's Doris. I'm not in any hurry, though." He took a bite of his burger, trying to think about how to get Aaron talking. It was an unspoken rule that you didn't ask about why people wanted to work on serial offenders. They all had reasons, and they were all private about those reasons. It didn't stop Dave from wondering. "So you were the lead prosecutor on that rape case a few years ago. Turner something?"

Hotch glanced up from his food to look at Dave, frowning slightly in thought. After a moment, he licked his lips and nodded. "Lona Turner, yes. The State vs. Sykes. Did you follow the case?" Somehow Hotch didn't think that was the case.

Dave shrugged again. "Read about it after the fact." He glanced over at Aaron. The truth was, he'd read up on his new partner the minute he'd heard rumors the kid might be recruited. "There was talk about you for State Attorney, maybe Attorney General someday. And then you chucked that and went to the Academy, did SWAT out in Seattle for a couple years."

Aaron looked back up at Dave, and after a moment he let a smile seep through his expression. "There was talk of that. It wasn't what I wanted." He shook his head. "You did your homework," he guessed, smiling, then took a bite of his food.

Dave grinned back. "Like to know what I'm getting myself into," he agreed. "Everyone pretty much agrees, you're a hotshot." He laughed. "Hotshot Hotchner."

Aaron laughed and sat back, watching Dave for a moment. David Rossi really wasn't the man Aaron had been expecting him to be. "Is that what they say?" he said, amused. And it wasn't that he didn't already know his reputation had preceded him, but he wasn't planning to ride on it. "I came to the BAU to do a job, not showboat. Aaron's fine."

Dave shook his head. "I didn't say I thought you were here to showboat. You're damn good at your job. And you did a good job on this case." He glanced at Aaron and took a drink of beer as he studied him. "I don't say that sort of thing lightly, Hotshot."

Aaron was still smiling softly. He nodded, not really sure what to say. "Thanks," he said, then paused. "It felt good." He sat there for another minute before he moved again to take another bite of his food, feeling oddly exposed for a moment. He cleared his throat and glanced up again, recovering. "I don't suppose I could veto the use of that nickname, can I?"

Dave laughed. "I'm not the only one who's heard it." He thought about that for a minute. "Can't veto it. Might be able to change it, though...Hotch." He grinned and nudged Aaron's leg under the table.

Aaron laughed, but his eyebrows lifted slightly at the nudge. That was entirely new, in a sense. You didn't exactly get chummy with colleagues when you were a prosecutor. He took another sip of his drink. "I can live with Hotch."

Dave grinned and turned his attention to his burger. He knew the guys he worked with; calling him Aaron wouldn't do anything to stop the Hotshot jokes. But shortening it to Hotch would catch on. And for whatever reason (Dave didn't inspect it too closely) he wanted to make things a little easier on Aaron Hotchner.

*****

To say that Dave Rossi and Haley Brooks hated each other from the moment they met wouldn't be entirely fair, but it was close. She was a pretty young woman, but from the first she seemed to dislike Dave simply because of what he represented--the FBI, the job that had taken Aaron from his successful career as a prosecutor and the promise of an eventual career in politics.

Dave, for his part, was polite and called her ma'am, and made a point to tell her that he'd heard how wonderful she was. In the back of his mind, though, he couldn't help remembering Aaron's apparent lack of excitement about the relationship. Haley had called the BAU and managed to get the number for the police department in Virginia where they were working a case. Dave was impressed that she'd got hold of them, but less impressed that she'd bothered when he found out she wanted Aaron to have lunch with her before she drove back down to Georgia for the week. Dave had invited himself along.

"Is it always like this?" she asked Dave at one point, when Aaron had excused himself to the restroom.

"Pretty much," Dave agreed. "But it's a lot better than it used to be. Few years ago one of our colleagues stretched himself so thin on his caseload that he collapsed in his hotel room. He was lucky to be travelling with a couple of guys."

Her eyes widened and he gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, we won't work Hotch that hard."

She raised her eyebrows. "Hotch?"

Dave shrugged. "Once a nickname gets started, it never dies." He grinned, glancing over Haley's shoulder to see Aaron coming back. He always looked so serious in those dark suits of his, so business-like and reserved. Dave wondered how Haley saw him, if he was always that serious.

Aaron wasn't oblivious to the underpinnings of discord between his two lunch companions. Which was a bit of a shame, considering he was stuck trying to play mediator between the woman he loved and a man he had taken to so quickly upon joining the BAU. Of course, Haley wasn't making Aaron's life any easier at the moment, but Dave wasn't making this lunch any more comfortable either. 

Aaron slid back into the booth and gave Haley a warm smile, but almost immediately wondered what Dave must have said because it was plain on her face that she was even less happy now than she had been when he'd left the table. He gave Dave a subtle look, then cleared his throat. "How do you like the school you'll be at?" he asked Haley, because turning the conversation back to her was the safest thing to do, and Dave had just been asking about her job before Aaron left anyway.

Haley smiled and curled her fingers around Aaron's hand. "Fine. Everyone there seems nice. Some of the curriculum requirements are different from Georgia schools, of course. But I'll get used to it. Dave says they're calling you Hotch now."

Aaron laughed softly and glanced at Dave. "Yeah. It was better than the alternative, trust me."

Dave grinned but didn't say anything. He was trying to figure out if Haley was being possessive of Aaron because Dave represented a job she hadn't wanted Aaron to take, or because she somehow knew he had designs on Aaron's affection.

"I'm just glad you had time to have lunch with me." She glanced at Dave, then back at Aaron. "It sounds like you're going to be working a lot."

"I would've thought prosecutors keep long hours, too," Dave remarked innocently.

"They do, but generally speaking, you're able to schedule it." Aaron shifted in his seat and turned his hand in Haley's, giving it a squeeze. He glanced at her. "It may not be as regular, but I'll make time," he said, then shrugged and hid his frown in his coffee cup, hoping he could keep that promise.

"Don't worry, we'll take good care of him for you," Dave said. He grinned and excused himself.

Haley turned to watch him walk to the restroom. "I don't like him."

"I've noticed," Aaron said immediately. "Why?" He had a feeling he knew the answer, and that she would avoid the truth.

She shrugged. "He's just...cocky. Sure of himself." She frowned at him. " _Hotch_?"

Aaron turned to look at her, and for a moment he wasn't sure what to say. He was starting to get a little upset, but he he reminded himself that this was all going to pass. It was just the stress of moving. It wasn't her fault. "Yes. Hotch." He forced himself not to ask why that bothered her too. He knew it was because it was apparent he was already fitting in at the BAU. "Since when is sure of yourself a bad thing?" He gave her hand another squeeze and tried on a lopsided, affectionate smile. "You've always liked it before."

Haley rolled her eyes. "I like it on you. It's sexy on you." She leaned up and kissed him quickly. "He's just--" She frowned and finally blurted, "He acts like he's entitled to part of you."

That actually surprised a laugh out of Hotch. "Haley, this isn't a competition. You have me, and this job isn't going to take that away," he assured, then leaned in and kissed her again. "It's going to be fine."

Haley was frowning at him when he pulled away. "If you're just going to laugh at me, maybe you should go back to work," she said.

Dave had been approaching the table again when he saw Hotch lean in and kiss Haley. He had a feeling this wasn't a good time to interrupt. He paused, then changed directions to go up to the front counter. "I was wondering if I could get three coffees to go," he said, and waited while they filled his order.

Aaron saw Dave coming back out of the corner of his eye, but didn't look away from Haley. "I'm not laughing at you," he said, his smile fading but not slipping off. "But I should go back to work anyway."

Dave slid back into his seat and placed the coffee cups in front of them. "I thought we could all use another cup for the road," he said, smiling at Haley. He wasn't sure he liked her--wasn't sure this relationship with her was really what Aaron wanted--but he was determined to be polite.

"Thanks," Aaron said, picking up his cup and slipping out of the booth. He didn't let go of Haley's hand. He just gave her a gentle tug and waited for her to follow.

Haley forced a smile. "That was nice," she said, following Aaron.

"It was very good to meet you," Dave said as they walked out. "Aaron talks about you a lot." He was looking forward to getting back to the case. He'd quickly gotten used to working with Aaron; they made a good team. It was unsettling to have Haley 'intruding' on their partnership.

"Likewise," Haley replied.

Aaron cleared his throat and gave Dave a little nod that said he'd meet Dave at the car. He turned and took Haley's other hand when Dave walked away. "I'll see you at home tonight," he murmured.

"No, you won't," she said. "Aaron, I'm going back to Georgia now. Did you listen to anything I said?"

Aaron grimaced and shook his head. "Sorry. Sorry. I know." It had slipped his mind after having to sit 'between' her and Dave all lunch. He kissed her again in a last ditch effort to make her feel better about this lunch. "I'll see you next Sunday, then."

Haley sighed and hugged him. "I love you, Aaron," she said, her voice quiet.

"I love you too," he said, then gave her a squeeze before releasing her with a smile. He waited for her to turn before he started towards the car Dave was waiting in, then he got inside and drew his seatbelt across himself, not saying anything.

Dave started the car and pulled out of the lot behind Haley. After a while he cleared his throat. "She's very pretty."

"Yes, she is." Aaron looked sideways at Dave, then turned back to the road. "What were you talking about while I was away from the table?"

Dave shrugged and kept his eyes on the road. "She just asked if the job is always like this, us on the road all this time and whatnot." He glanced at Aaron briefly. "I couldn't lie to her."

"I'm sure she appreciated your honesty," Aaron said, which was possibly a passive aggressive reply, but it slipped before Aaron could stop it. That didn't usually happen; he started to wonder when he'd gotten that comfortable with Dave.

Dave raised his eyebrows. "I seriously doubt she appreciated anything about me," he said. "I'm sorry for it; I always try to get along with my partner's wives." Oops, that little dig had sort of slipped out.

Aaron glanced at Dave, frowning. "She's just settling in." Great. And now he was making excuses. He held a sigh and looked back at the road.

Dave shrugged. "Hey, as long as you're happy, man." Of course, he wasn't a hundred percent convinced Aaron _was_ happy, but he'd give it the benefit of the doubt for now.

"I am," Aaron said. He'd be happier if the people in his life could be happy for him, but that might have been asking too much in some cases.

Dave nodded. "Good. That's what matters. Just hang on to that happiness." _It doesn't last._

The rest of the drive back to the police station was silent.

*****

Dave smiled at Doris as she joked about one of the SACs, but his gaze was drawn to Aaron, who was striding into the BAU bunker, a tense look on his face. _This is getting bad_ , Dave told himself. Over the past few months, he'd gotten to the point where he was more concerned, more invested--more _attracted_ \--to Aaron than any of the cute girls who expressed interest. "Excuse me," he murmured, looking back at Doris and touching his fingers briefly to her shoulder. He smiled, but it was absent, his attention already caught by Aaron's odd entrance.

He headed for the desk they shared, unsurprised to find Aaron searching the desk for something.

"What's wrong?"

Aaron didn't look up. A case had just come up, one from a killer they'd all assumed disappeared. Aaron had done some consulting on the case with Gideon when he was a brand new agent, but no one had been able to find the guy before. The case had never _officially_ been handed over to the BAU, however. Until now. They just had a brand new body in Michigan with the exact same MO.

Aaron found the case file that was buried under newer, more active investigations, and dropped it on the desk in front of Dave. "Grand Rapids Killer. There's a new body. That's what's wrong." He took the file back before Dave could even look at it and started thumbing through its contents.

"I didn't think that was an official case." Dave moved to stand behind Aaron and look over his shoulder at the file. He knew Aaron and Jason had done some consulting on it, though, which probably made this personal for Aaron.

"It's not," Aaron said. Dave was brushing against his shoulder, but Aaron didn't bother to look up or move. He shook his head. "It should be." He frowned. "I want to be ready if they call us in."

Dave laughed. "You're always ready. Same signature as the others? What's the victimology?" He could feel his pulse speeding up at the way Aaron didn't pull away from him. He was walking a very dangerous line, and he knew it--but he couldn't seem to stop.

"White females, late thirties, dark hair, all found with their clothes torn, but no evidence of sexual assault." Hotch turned over a picture of a badly mutilated woman and frowned deeply. "And I'm not always ready. I'm never ready, really. I'm not convinced you can be in this job. I just... work well under pressure."

"You'd have to be, Mister Hotshot Prosecutor," Dave teased. He took the picture out of Aaron's hand and studied it. "Is she posed like this as a forensic countermeasure, or is this some kind of...display?"

"The unsub did that for display. The shredded clothes are always meticulously piled in five different places around the body," Arron said. "Always five."

Dave sighed. "Grand Rapids PD asked for a consult some time ago, right? Why haven't they called us in yet?"

"I don't know." Aaron glanced up at Gideon's office and wondered he'd heard yet. Probably. Nothing got past Agent Gideon.

"Hm." Dave handed the picture back to Aaron and shook his head. "Well, Gideon'll probably take you with him if he gets the call. Lucky you." Dave and Gideon didn't always see eye-to-eye, though they managed to show each other professional respect, most of the time. Still, Aaron knew Dave preferred to work with almost anyone instead of Gideon.

Aaron arched an eyebrow, but didn't respond. He'd learned quickly not to talk too loudly--or too affectionately--about Jason Gideon around Dave. Which was a shame, really, considering Aaron liked Gideon so much. Aaron cleared his throat and sat back in his seat, again ignoring that Dave was so close, and focused back on the files.

Dave snagged a chair from another desk and pulled it over. Before he'd resumed the conversation, though, Jason stuck his head out of his office.

"Hotch." He beckoned. Dave raised his eyebrows in amusement and shoved back out of the way.

Aaron glanced up, then pushed away from the desk, taking the file with him and offering Dave a tiny parting glance. When he got to Gideon's office, he stepped inside--about half way to the desk, a position neither overbearing or timid--and stood, his posture neutral. "I presume you've heard they found another body in Grand Rapids."

"We've got the call," Gideon said, glancing up over the tops of his reading glasses. "We're flying commercial, wheels up in an hour. I want you along, since you did the initial consult with me." He looked back down to his desktop, where he was gathering papers into a folder. "If you think Rossi can do without you for a week or two."

"Of course. I'm reviewing the case files already." Aaron breathed a small laugh and nodded when Gideon continued, appreciating the sentiment even if he didn't necessarily agree. "Dave is more than capable of handling things without me," he said.

Gideon nodded slowly. "Dave's become a good friend, hasn't he?" he murmured, looking over his papers. It would have been a nonchalant question, except for the slight emphasis he placed on Dave's first name.

Aaron's eyebrows inched up, then Aaron forced them down before Gideon looked back up. "Becoming, yes. I suppose you could say that," he replied finally, figuring he'd wait and see what Gideon had to say before drawing an assumption based on Gideon's tone.

Gideon nodded. When he looked up, he had a funny little smile on his face. "I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you. I'm not sure what to make of it." He stopped speaking, though it looked as though he wanted to say something else.

Hotch's eyes narrowed in thought, but he didn't look away. He just held Gideon's gaze for a moment, trying to discern where this was going, or why it had been brought up. He finally looked away and out the window of Gideon's office. "Sir, I'm not blind to the fact that you and Agent Rossi don't exactly see eye to eye, but I certainly hope you know I would never base my opinion of you on someone else's," he said. "So if there's a problem, I'd prefer it if you just told me," he added, looking back.

Gideon just stared at him for a moment, his expression somewhere between appraising and amused. Finally he laughed. "David Rossi is a fine profiler, even if I think his methods are occasionally...unorthodox..." He shook his head. "Hotch, this is probably none of my business. But I'm concerned that perhaps you don't know Rossi as well as you think you do."

Aaron frowned. "I said 'becoming' friends for a reason," he said, but he felt a little uncomfortable now, like there was some big secret he wasn't in on. "Are you... going to explain what you're talking about, or am I supposed to guess?" He watched Gideon for another moment, and then the corners of his lips curled up in an uncomfortable smile. "Or am I supposed to just wait and be surprised?"

Gideon steepled his fingers for a moment, then took off his glasses and looked directly at Aaron. "You aren't married, but I believe you have a serious girlfriend, is that correct?"

Aaron stood there a minute, trying to catch up, and when he did, he shook his head and laughed. "No-- I mean, yes, I do, but I've heard those rumors about Dave. Dave and Haley pretty much hate each other. I'm not particularly worried," he said, smiling.

Gideon coughed and rubbed his jaw. "That doesn't make me feel any better," he muttered. "Hotch..." He glanced past Aaron, then sighed. "Agent Rossi doesn't always, ah, limit himself to the fairer sex."

The smile slowly slid off Aaron's face, but he felt a little too floored to say anything for a moment. Gideon thought Dave was interested in _Aaron_? It took a few breaths to recover... only Aaron didn't really recover at all because the only thing he could think to say was, "If there's nothing more, I'll see you on the plane in..." He glanced at the clock. "Forty-five minutes." He managed a smile, one that said he didn't quite buy what Gideon was telling him, but that he was more than willing to drop the subject, if his words hadn't been clear enough.

Gideon shrugged. "Right. See you then." He didn't look away from Aaron.

Aaron held his gaze for a moment. He felt like he should probably say something else, but he finally just nodded and then turned and left the office. When he settled back at his desk--the desk he shared with Dave--he dropped the case file back on it and glanced across the table at Dave. It wasn't possible that Dave was attracted to _him_. Aaron swallowed and shoved the thought away. "We've got the case. I'm off in forty."

Smiling, Dave looked up from the notes he'd been taking on another case. "Lucky you." He glanced at the calendar tacked on the wall by the desk. "Don't forget to call Haley if you're going to be gone past Friday. I _could_ entertain her, but I don't think either of us would really enjoy it."

Aaron should have laughed, but for a moment he could only think of the assumption he'd made in Gideon's office about what Gideon had been implying, which inevitably lead him back to what Gideon _did_ actually mean. "Yeah, probably not," he murmured.

Dave's brows drew together and he sat back. "Are you okay? Normally you smack me if I badmouth your wife." It wasn't true, or at least it had only happened once, when they were both in a goofy mood after a solving a case and having a few celebratory beers, but Dave had the feeling Aaron wasn't even listening to him.

"No, yeah, I'm fine." Aaron looked back after a moment. "I'm just distracted. And technically admitting you two don't get along isn't the same as badmouthing her. It's just fact," he said, not quite satisfied with his own tone, but ignoring it.

"Right." Dave just looked at him, trying to figure out why things had gone weird in the past fifteen minutes. "Well, good luck in Grand Rapids."

Aaron nodded, and picked up a few files, then pushed from the desk. "Thanks. I need to get my things in order. I'll see you... hopefully soon," he said, and started out of the bullpen.

*****

The case in Grand Rapids had seemed to fall into place so quickly. Every lead seemed to get them somewhere; each witness had more pieces of the puzzle. They tracked their unsub easily. In the final hours, though, things had taken a turn for the worst. And in the final moments, their unsub took both his last victim's life and his own.

Hotch had stood there for a long moment, just staring, his gun still partially raised and all the blood draining from his face. He didn't look away though until a strong hand squeezed his shoulder. He tried to steel himself, but he knew the expression he turned on Gideon was wearier than he wanted it to be. Still, he swallowed hard, holstered his gun, and managed to walk away from the scene.

It was a shock after how well the case had gone, and the ending--death, nothingness, no resolution, no closure, nobody saved--left Hotch feeling inexplicably emptier than he had on all the previous cases. That night he went back to the hotel and didn't sleep, mostly out of choice, because he didn't really want to see what he saw when he closed his eyes.

When he arrived back in Quantico late the following day, it was just to pick up a few of his things. He went straight to his shared desk, sorted through a few stacks until he found what he wanted, and then tucked the papers under his arm. "Hey," he said, finally glancing up at Dave. "I'll see you tomorrow." He started away from the desk.

"Stop." Gideon had called Dave from the hotel the night before and outlined how the case ended. He hadn't needed to tell Dave how Aaron had taken it--Dave had already known how Aaron would take it--but he did.

Gideon had called again from the airport and told Dave they were on their way back to Quantico. Dave had been playing solitaire for an hour waiting for Aaron and Jason to get back from their flight. He'd only swept the cards off the desk and into a drawer when he'd heard the bunker door open.

Dave looked up at Aaron. "I'm not letting you leave alone."

Aaron stopped moving, but didn't turn around at first. He really didn't want other people to feel like he needed to be coddled or taken care of. It was a bad case. They all had bad cases, and he knew that, even if it had been his first really bad case, it wouldn't be his last. He sighed and glanced over his shoulder. "I'm really fine."

"Sure you are. But I need company. Gideon won't drink with me since I put my tie around my head and sang the theme song for _Cheers_ at the top of my lungs in the Quantico bar last year." Dave rolled his eyes. "You're not fine, Aaron, a blind man could see you're not fine. You need scotch and distraction. I can at least provide the former, and if the pool table's free, I'll provide the latter."

Aaron breathed a laugh, but he felt a little too tired to really be amused. "I'll _be_ fine. And I _need_ to go home," he protested.

Dave shook his head. "Fine, you can come home with me if you don't want the Quantico bar. You're not going home alone. Don't make me drag you. I'm an expert on methods of abduction."

Out of the corner of Aaron's eye, he saw Gideon glance back at them as he shuffled into his office. Aaron didn't look back. "Haley's... in Georgia," he remembered. He shook his head. "I don't need a babysitter."

Dave snorted. "Don't argue with me, Hotshot," he said, looping an arm around Aaron's shoulders in a manner that was only loosely removed from a headlock. "My apartment, scotch, you can sleep on the couch. Your wife won't miss you since she's not here."

"A regular slumber party," Aaron deadpanned, but didn't protest anymore; he just let Dave walk him out of the office.

Dave gave Gideon a look over Aaron's shoulder, mostly to let him know Dave hadn't forgotten the last thing he said on the phone: _"David, be careful."_

Aaron didn't talk much on the drive to Dave's apartment, but Dave didn't really mind. It wasn't a comfortable silence, but he didn't expect anything to be comfortable for Aaron right now. He'd watched a woman murdered in front of him. Who could be comfortable after a thing like that? When they got home, Dave's cat sniffed suspiciously at the cuff of Aaron's pants while Dave took Aaron's bag and dropped it by the end of the couch.

"Scotch or rum?" he asked. "Or vodka, but I won't be responsible for you if you pick the last."

Aaron watched the cat for a moment as it went from sniffing to hopping into his lap and looking at Aaron, purring for no understandable reason. "Whatever you're drinking," he said, staring back at the cat as blankly as the cat was staring at him. 

Dave, halfway to the kitchen, nodded and went to them two glasses of scotch. When he came back in, he said, "Shithead, be nice."

Aaron blinked, then turned a confused look on Dave before he realized Dave had to be talking to his cat. "Tell me you didn't seriously name your cat Shithead."

Dave shrugged. "Kay named him Mr. Fluffy. He always looked disgruntled when she called him that. So I call him Shithead." He handed a glass of scotch to Aaron and settled on the couch a couple feet away. "Amazingly, he always answers to it when I have a can of food in my hand."

"You must have a way with animals," Aaron said, his tone ironic. He downed about half his glass in one gulp as the cat formerly known as Mr. Fluffy decided to make Aaron's lap its new resting place.

Dave snorted. "Or something." He took a sip of his scotch. He stared at the beige carpeting, Gideon's voice echoing in his head. _David, be careful_. He wondered if Gideon had said anything to Aaron about this. There was no question he'd seen it, if he was passing along warnings like that. But be careful of what? Dave sighed and took another sip. "Have you talked to Haley this week?"

"A couple of times. I called last night, but got her voice mail." Aaron finally lifted his hand to stroke the cat gently, its purring growing louder the moment he touched the soft fur. He didn't really want to admit that, when it came to the way this case had gone, he didn't have a clue how to talk to her. Or keep her convinced that this was a job that made him happy.

Aaron was petting Shithead. Dave didn't know if it was some instinct that made people pet animals, or if something about a purring cat insisted on being given affection. He didn't care. He was just glad Shithead hadn't decided to hide under the couch, hissing and growling the entire time Aaron was here.

"Friday night," Dave said. "She have friends she goes out with there?"

Aaron looked up at Dave as he scratched behind the cats ears and smiled softly. "Yeah, that's probably it. She actually had quite a few friends. Much more social than I ever was." Of course she also had more free time, but that was beside the point. Aaron knew that situation was only going to keep going the way it always had.

Dave nodded. "I know how that goes." Another sip, then he reminded himself he was trying _not_ to get as drunk as Aaron tonight. "You didn't leave her a message?"

"No, I did," Aaron said, but didn't say anymore, even when he knew Dave would know that was an obvious avoidance of the implicit question within the question: _what did you tell her_? He gulped the rest of his drink.

 _And she didn't call you back_? Dave thought. He darted a glance at Aaron, but just said, "Oh." He paused. "What did you say?"

Aaron sighed and shook his head. "That the case was over, I was safe, and that I was going home." He shrugged, then eyed his empty glass. "I'd get up for more, but Shithead might bite me if I move now."

Dave laughed and stood. "Let me." He went to the kitchen and brought the bottle back. "He does seem to like you. Hell of a lot more than he ever liked Kay."

"I'm not going to marry you, if that's what you're implying," Aaron said dryly, and only thought a little too late how that might sound. He held out his glass and hoped Dave would just laugh it off.

Dave laughed again, louder this time, and splashed some scotch into Aaron's glass. "Shithead, bite him," he said, grinning. "That would be an interesting method of choosing my next wife. 'Hey, come here, let me see if Shithead likes you.' First test would be if she actually calls him Shithead."

Aaron chuckled, feeling a little better if only because he was still able to laugh. "I'm not sure you'll get many women with that one. I'd start out with something easier." His stomach was doing strange things as they talked about Dave's wife and Dave getting women. _He doesn't always go for the fairer sex_ , he thought. _I've actually never seen Dave take to someone as easily as he has to you_ , Gideon's voice reminded him. Aaron tried to ignore how comfortable and easy this felt.

"Pity. I like women a little more than I like most men," Dave said. Of course, it wasn't true about Aaron. God, he shouldn't have said that. He wondered again if Gideon had said anything to Aaron.

Aaron grinned. "Just a little?" His stomach lurched a bit as the words just slipped out and his smile went a bit absent. He took another gulp of his drink.

 _Don't do this_ , Dave told himself. He shrugged. "Women smell nicer most of the time." It was a non-answer. Maybe Aaron would let it go. Then again, maybe he'd ask if Dave got divorced because he was gay. Dave took a long sip of scotch. He wasn't gay. He just...liked men sometimes.

Aaron nodded. "Yes, they do." He wasn't exactly sure what to say now, so he focused on petting the cat again and drinking a little more.

Dave decided to let that go unanswered. Scotch was easier than explaining. If Aaron wanted to ask, he would ask. Dave would answer. But Gideon had called Dave because Aaron needed company, not because he needed a good hard fuck. And not because he needed to be seduced away from his fiancee. _You'd hate yourself later_ , he told himself. He took a long drink of scotch and stared blankly at the wall.

The room went silent for a while, but it certainly wasn't comfortable. There was obviously something unspoken in the air, and Aaron tried to tell himself it had nothing to do with the very slim chance Dave was _attracted_ to him.

The silence was maybe worse than if he'd tried to explain. Or laugh it off as a joke. But Dave couldn't quite bring himself to laugh it off. It was true, he _did_ like guys sometimes. There was something about Aaron that inspired complete trust. Maybe it was his quiet self-confidence. Maybe it was his integrity. Maybe Dave was just stupid. He took another sip of his scotch and bit back the words he suddenly wanted to say.

Aaron could feel his jaw tensing as he tried to figure out something to say, just something to make the heaviness in the room dissipate. There wasn't anything though, and after a moment, he drew a heavy breath and just said what he was thinking. "Something just sucked all the air out of the room. What just happened?" he asked, turning to look at Dave again and holding his gaze.

"Fragment in the space-time continuum," Dave suggested, then sighed. "Look, I'm sorry if it bothers you. I'm not _gay_. I do like women, even if Kay and I didn't work out." He shrugged and finished his scotch. "I just like men sometimes." He didn't look over at Aaron. _I like you. I like you more than I should. I'm a fucking idiot._ He poured himself another glass.

Aaron didn't look away, in spite of the way Dave didn't look at him. Between that and Gideon's assessment of the relationship Dave and Aaron had quickly formed, Aaron was starting to think there might be some truth to the idea that Dave was interested in him. Aaron felt oddly sick, lightheaded, and flattered all at the same time. "I don't care who you sleep with," he said.

Dave glanced over at Aaron, trying to judge how true those words were. He had a feeling Aaron cared more than he was willing to admit; most men didn't like getting hit on by other men. Dave had learned that lesson years ago, after a half-joking suggestion had gotten his nose broken. "It's not like I make a big deal about it. And I do like women." He wasn't sure why he was still defending himself.

Aaron's eyebrows went up. "I believe you," he said, then held out his glass for more scotch even though he was starting to feel a little warm and fuzzy already. When Dave filled his glass, Aaron slouched down on the couch a little and dropped his head back, closing his eyes. Shithead stirred and repositioned himself, and Aaron took another long drink of the amber liquid in his glass.

A grin crept across Dave's face at how Shithead had completely appropriated Aaron as his property. "I _am_ glad my cat likes you, though. Sometimes he bites strangers." He shifted sideways on the couch so he could see Aaron better. "But he seems to have the misapprehension that you're a pushover." God, Aaron was _pretty_. It occurred to Dave that he'd probably already had too much to drink, considering how strong the temptation was with Aaron, and how weak his own willpower was.

Aaron hummed a small laugh and scratched under the cat's chin. He could feel Dave watching him, even with his eyes closed, and he wasn't sure why it excited him, when it clearly shouldn't. "As long as he keeps his claws in, I don't really care what he does in my lap." He took another sip. He should stop.

"You know, that sort of thing is dangerous to say in this apartment," Dave teased. As soon as the words were out of his mouth he wanted to have them back. This was why he should have stopped drinking at least half a glass ago--he said stupid things that were going to make his partner hate him. Dave had never met anyone who was so damn good at putting up with him--possibly even _liking_ him. He didn't need to alienate Aaron.

Aaron breathed a laugh and opened his eyes, Dave's words sending a weird jolt through him. "Is that why the mention of you not being straight brought our conversation to a halt just a moment ago?" he asked. His tone was casual--of course, he couldn't help that after a few glasses of Scotch--but he wasn't sure he really wanted an answer now that he'd asked the question.

Dave blinked at Aaron, feeling a sudden chill go through him. He was honestly the stupidest man alive. There was no other explanation. _You were practically throwing yourself at him_ , said a voice in the back of his head. Aloud, he just said, "Huh?"

Aaron rolled his eyes and just turned to give Dave a look. "Alcohol doesn't kill brain cells quite this quick."

Dave took a long breath, making himself meet Aaron's gaze, but he didn't say anything.

Aaron looked at Dave, waiting for Dave to say something. He felt oddly disappointed when Dave didn't reply, though he was feeling increasingly guilty for even allowing himself to enjoy the possibility that someone else was attracted to him anyway. Not that he didn't know he was attractive, but it was rare for him to actually _like_ the people that seemed to be attracted to him. He sucked in a breath and looked away. "I didn't know what I could tell her that she'd understand. When I called." He wasn't sure if he was bringing up Haley out of guilt, or drawing attention to the way Dave understood certain things that Haley wouldn't. It was possibly both.

The mention of Haley sent a pang of guilt through Dave. He licked his lips. He didn't like Haley, and he didn't think she really understood Aaron, but he didn't have the right to push her out of Aaron's life. "I don't think you can," he said quietly. He shouldn't present himself as an alternative, as someone who understood what this life was like. Even though he was. "We see things other people can't even dream of. People like her _shouldn't_ understand. We stand between them and the darkness." He paused, then added, "It's why I couldn't let you go home alone."

Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he said softly. "I don't think I _could_ tell her what happened and still convince her that I want to go back to work tomorrow anyway." He laughed softly and took another drink.

"She wouldn't believe you," Dave said. "She'd think you're crazy for wanting to do this. It isn't that you enjoy the work. It's that catching the bad guys is more important than anything." He didn't look away from Aaron; he looked so tired, so worn down. Dave really just wanted to hug him and promise it would get a little easier.

"The justice system is..." Aaron thought for a moment and shook his head, then reached out and nudged Dave's leg with the back of his hand. "I should sleep. I've had too much to drink and I didn't sleep last night at all. I might start saying inappropriate things to your cat."

Dave let out a choked laugh. "He likes it," he said. "And I'd probably pay money to see you that shit-faced." He swallowed and tried to ignore the way Aaron's hand had sent a wave of heat through his entire body. "Hang on. I have blankets."

Aaron nodded. "Thanks," he murmured and rolled a bit to put his glass on a coaster on the end table, accidentally dumping the cat. It flicked his tail and started off across the room haughtily. "Sorry, cat," he mumbled, then rolled back and slouched further on the couch.

Dave wandered back to the bedroom to pull sheets and a blanket out of his closet. He grabbed a pillow off his bed and went back out to the front room. He was amused to find Aaron exactly the way he'd left him. Dave dumped the blankets on his head, then sat down next to him again, maybe just a little closer than he'd been before. "Don't be surprised if you have company in the morning," he said, and yawned.

Aaron didn't move for a moment, and then he dragged the covers down over his face, pulling his hair down to cover his forehead. "You or the cat?" he said, his tone warm. Oh yes, he had drank far too much. He really hoped Dave would laugh.

 _Oh, God_. Dave's mouth went dry mid-yawn. He licked his lips, then shrugged. "Couch isn't big enough for me, too," he said. Aaron couldn't know how much he wanted that. Dave drained his glass again, unable to quite tear his gaze away. He'd never seen Aaron like this before. It was damn sexy.

Aaron hummed softly, then turned his head to look at Dave. Far too much to drink. _Haley_ , he thought. _If you were sober, you wouldn't be allowing yourself to do this. If you were sober, and you weren't exhausted, and you didn't need someone who understood what you were dealing with right now..._ "Sorry," he said frowning. "I shouldn't say things like that."

Dave cleared his throat. _Don't. Don't say it._ "I don't mind."

Aaron smiled softly. "Okay." _Shut up_. He nodded and looked away. "Yeah, I should sleep," he said after a moment.

Dave nodded and stood up, his gaze warm on Aaron's face. "Let me know if you need anything," he said, and headed back to his bedroom. He brushed his teeth and pulled on his pajamas, then crawled into bed and tried not to think about the man in the other room. He heard Aaron cough once before he fell into a light sleep.

He woke up a few hours later, his senses alert, his heart thudding in his chest. He wasn't sure what had woken him, but a moment later he heard a low cry from the living room. He sighed and sat up, rubbing a hand over his face. There weren't many reasons for a noise like that, and somehow he didn't think Aaron was jacking off in his front room.

Shithead jumped off the bed and followed him down the hallway. Dave paused, watching Aaron shifting restlessly on the couch. No, he was definitely asleep. Dave shook his head. It was probably past time for this, for that matter.

He approached the couch cautiously, leaving enough room for Aaron to wake violently, and reached a tentative hand to grip Aaron's shoulder. "Aaron!"

There was blood everywhere, but nothing was making sense any more. There was no in and no out... and no end. Aaron _hated_ feeling powerless, and it was biting on his every nerve that he was. And then something grabbed him. Aaron gasped, jerked out of the touch, and ran back into... something soft? He blinked his eyes open, straining to see through the dark. 

_Dave. The couch. The cat._ Aaron let out a low groan and collapsed face first against the cushions, his heart pounding against his ribs. _It's fine. Everything's fine._ He swallowed hard. His throat was dry. "Sorry," he mumbled. "Go back to bed."

"Not yet," Dave said. He was relieved that Aaron was awake, but he didn't think for a minute that, if Dave went back to bed, Aaron would feel any better. He went to the kitchen and got a glass of water from the tap, then brought it back to Aaron. "Here." He sat on the floor, leaning against the couch, and didn't say anything for a while. Finally, when Aaron's breathing was starting to slow a little, Dave opened his mouth.

"One of my first cases with the BAU was a sexual sadist out in Iowa. He had this place in the woods where he kept his victims, a clearing with a cruciform rack. Shackles for the wrists and ankles. When he was finished with the girls--always girls, they were never older than sixteen--he dismembered them. Except the last one. We were close, he didn't have time. Instead he left her hanging on that cross with a stake shoved through her stomach. She looked so scared..." He trailed off and closed his eyes, rubbed his hands over his face.

"That night was when mine started. I see fourteen-year-old Melinda Sauders, with her long brown hair sticking to her face with her own blood. Fourteen years old. I'm standing in the clearing, and she lifts her head and asks me why I wasn't faster."

Aaron didn't move for a moment, just listening and trying to process what Dave was telling him. Not only had the case left him feeling powerless, but it had left him feeling weak too--weak for not being able to save the last victim, weak for letting it keep him awake now two nights in a row. He finally rolled over on his back when Dave finished. He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes hard and blew out a gust of air. "How long?"

"They get easier after a while," Dave said. "After I have one, I sit and remind myself of the ones we _have_ helped. List them off by name. It's a trick Jason taught me, actually." He lifted his head and turned to look at Aaron. Once again he was tempted to hug him and promise it would be okay. "It really does get easier."

Aaron sighed. It wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear, but it was honest and better than it could have been. He nodded and then laced his hands over his chest, frowning at the ceiling. "Thanks," he murmured.

Shithead twined around one of Dave's ankles, then jumped up onto the couch by Aaron's head. Dave had to suppress a snort; it was really bad when you were jealous of a cat. "We stand between them and the darkness," he said softly.

Aaron made an amused-annoyed noise at the cat, then picked it up and replaced it in front of his stomach so he didn't have fur in his face. His hand automatically moved to stroke the cat's back. "I know," he said. "I know. I just..." He trailed off, not sure what he meant to say.

"I know," Dave said, his voice quiet. He didn't look at Aaron, but he didn't move, either.

The cat had curled up and started purring against Aaron's chest, and he let his hand rest on it, finally turning to look at Dave. "Thanks," he repeated.

Dave's lips curled faintly. "Hey, I'm your partner. S'what I'm here for." He glanced over at Aaron, not sure how to ask if Aaron wanted to go back to sleep now or wanted company for a while longer.

Aaron didn't look away, but suddenly the memories of everything that had been said between them before he'd fallen asleep hit him when Dave smiled. And Aaron was far too sober now to try to figure out where all of his intrigue and interest in Dave's attraction to him had even come from. Aaron was straight, and would probably be getting married soon. He licked his lips. "What time is it?"

"No clue." Dave squinted across the room at the clock on his VCR. "Three-something. Plenty of time left to sleep, if you think you can."

Aaron drew a deep breath and started to roll onto his back when he remembered the cat, then just stayed where he was. "I don't know," he murmured. He didn't think he was going to sleep well for some time. "I should probably try, though."

Dave nodded. He got to his knees, then rested a hand for a moment on Aaron's blanket-covered ankle. He opened his mouth, but couldn't think of anything to say, so he just nodded again and stood. "Sleep well," he said finally, and went back to bed.

He lay awake until his alarm went off at six.


	2. Chapter 2

Dave came around a corner at full tilt and stopped, bewildered. He'd thought he was chasing a guy down a simple alley, and suddenly he found himself in what was almost a courtyard--if a trash-strewn stretch of pavement that smelled of piss could be called a courtyard. And the unsub was nowhere in sight. "Shit," he swore softly, and reached for his radio.

"Hotch, I lost him," he mumbled, practically eating the mouthpiece in his attempt to be quiet. "He might be headed your way." He didn't lower his gun, and his eyes kept roving over his surroundings as he spoke. Where was the son of a bitch? They couldn't let him slip away again. They'd been close two weeks ago, and he'd given them another body, _taunting_ them, after that.

Off to his left something clattered, not loud enough to be trashcan lids, but maybe an empty bottle or something. He took off running again, telling his radio, "Heading south--I think--I'm behind a row of brick buildings." He entered a narrower alley, his gun at the ready. He was going to nail this asshole if it killed him.

As he approached a recessed doorway, he did something stupid--he didn't slow down. At the moment he came abreast of the recess, something cracked with mind-shattering force into his jaw. Dave grunted and reeled back, his gun spinning out of his hand, and that same something bashed him in the temple. He went down to his knees with a groan. A series of kicks to his ribs and kidneys had him on the ground, curled to try to protect himself.

The pain was mercifully short before everything faded to black.

Aaron didn't bother to spare a glance at Gideon before breaking off into a run in the direction of the sudden commotion. He could hear the older agent's footfalls behind him, and as they got closer, he could hear Dave's protesting cries of pain stop. _Fuck_. When he rounded the corner into the alley, their unsub was standing over Dave with a blade, too close. And when he saw them, he moved too quickly toward Dave.

Both Aaron and Gideon fired, and the unsub went staggering backwards and fell. Aaron didn't have a moment to spare to even consider that he'd just shot (and probably killed) someone. He keyed his radio for EMTs as Gideon went to check on the unsub, and rushed to Dave, dropping to his knees and rolling Dave over, checking his pulse. "He's unconscious."

Gideon checked the unsub for a pulse, though it was obvious the man was dead. "Ride with him."

Aaron glanced up at Gideon, but Gideon wasn't looking at him. He looked back down at Dave and he felt ill.

It was a thankfully short ride to the hospital, and Aaron sat in the waiting room for a long time, fidgeting until the nurses said he could go in and see Dave. Dave wasn't awake yet, but Aaron went in anyway and slumped into the chair near Dave's bed, trying to ignore how weak and battered Dave looked. Aaron had had a lot of time in the silence of the waiting room to think about what had happened, about the sick jolt he'd felt when he thought Dave was about to be killed, when he thought he was going to lose Dave.

Not that Dave was _his_. Aaron knew he shouldn't think that way. It was foolish, not to mention dangerous. That didn't mean he could stop the thoughts, though, especially when they were at work and any wrong move could mean an untimely end for either of them.

"I killed someone for you," Aaron murmured. "You bastard." He dropped his head back against the chair and slumped down, ready to wait until Dave woke up, however long that took.

"Thought I'd name m'next cat that," Dave mumbled through a mouth that felt mushy. His head was throbbing and it hurt to breathe. But considering he was surprised to be waking up at all, he couldn't complain. "You get him?"

Aaron sat right back up as soon as Dave spoke and stared at him. For a moment he didn't say anything, but his lips were curling in spite of himself, not only because Dave was awake, but also because he had attempted a _joke_ in the state he was in. "Got him before he got you," he said after a pause. 

Dave sighed and rolled his head so he could see Aaron better. "Was stupid. Didn't check the doorway." He blinked and studied Aaron. "You okay?"

"I'm fine," Aaron said, and looked at Dave, then let his lips quirk to the side. "Scuffed my knees up, ruined my pants... but fine," he teased.

Dave managed a weak laugh. "See a pretty nurse about it?"

Aaron laughed. "Not a pretty one," he joked. "Do you need something?"

"Nnh." Dave closed his eyes. "They tell you how bad I am? Anything broken, or just bruised?"

"You have a few broken ribs. They said you were lucky they didn't have to wire your jaw." Aaron pushed out of his chair and walked over to the bed, standing over it. Then he decided ' _what the hell_ ', and sat on the edge. "I told them to do it anyway--it might give me a bit of a reprieve--but they were unfortunately more ethical than that."

Dave laughed again, louder this time, and tried to ignore the bolt of pain it sent through his head. "Nice." Actually it was nice, waking up and having Aaron here. He shifted so his hand brushed Aaron's hip, just enough for a little contact. "I thought he was going to kill me," he confessed.

Aaron's eyes flicked to the where Dave's hand went and then back to Dave. He didn't move. _You're an idiot. Don't encourage this. You're having a stress reaction to almost losing him to-- He's not **yours**!_ He cleared his throat. "He _was_ going to kill you."

"You saved my life." Dave's voice was quiet. He knew anyone would have done it. It shouldn't matter that it was Aaron. But it did. He smiled and closed his eyes. "Thanks."

Aaron nodded. "I killed someone." He realized, _after_ Dave thanked him, that he didn't regret it. He wasn't happy about it, but he did the right thing.

Dave's eyes opened again. After a moment he inhaled, winced, and lifted his hand to rest it on Aaron's arm. "I'm sorry."

Aaron shook his head and ignored the fleeting impulse to cover Dave's hand with his own. He wondered if it was the drugs Dave was surely on that was causing all the touching, though Aaron couldn't deny that some small part of him liked it. "I'd do it again."

"Mm. I'm still sorry." Dave closed his eyes again, but he didn't stop touching Aaron. He'd done something stupid and because of that impulsive mistake, Aaron had been forced to take a life. It didn't matter that it was a man who'd sadistically hunted and killed people; it was still a person who lived and breathed, and didn't any longer because of Aaron's skill with a gun. It was selfish, but Dave wished it hadn't been his fault.

Aaron swallowed and glanced out the door to see no one was there, then slid his hand over Dave's in spite of himself. "Don't be."

The touch warmed Dave straight through, making his heart jolt almost uncomfortably. He opened his eyes to look up at Aaron, his gaze more affectionate than he'd meant it to be. "You're a good man, Aaron."

Aaron sucked in a breath at the expression on Dave's face. "I try to be," he said, and drew his hand away because it was a reminder of the ways sometimes he wasn't. _What am I doing?_

Dave hummed and let his eyes close again. "They going to let me leave any time soon?" _That's it, change the subject,_ he told himself. _Back away from letting him see how you feel. He's going to get married, you stupid bastard. Let him be._ "Or you going to take care of Shithead for me?"

Aaron laughed. "Who takes care of him while you're on cases?"

"He likes you more than he likes my upstairs neighbor." Dave forced a smile, despite the sting in his lip.

"Yeah, I'll watch him," Aaron said, his eyes traveling Dave's bruised face.

"That mean they're not letting me out?" Dave shifted, then grunted at the stabby pain in his side. "Is Gideon angry?"

"No, he's not." Aaron watched Dave for a moment. "Are you sure you don't need a nurse?"

"Nah, you're better company." Dave's lips quirked a little. "And just as pretty."

Aaron blinked at Dave, his eyebrows lifting. "Strike that. You've had quiet enough Morphine already."

Dave laughed and closed his eyes again. "Thanks, Hotshot," he murmured.

"You're welcome," Aaron said, smiling. "And thanks for calling me 'pretty', I suppose. First time I've ever heard that one."

Eyes still closed, Dave smiled. He liked it when he could hear the amusement in Aaron's voice. He liked it when he could actually make Aaron crack a smile, for that matter. _God, you've got it bad_ , he told himself scornfully. "Hard to believe," he mumbled. He was getting sleepy again.

Aaron watched Dave for a bit longer, seeing as how Dave wasn't looking at him now. "Mmm," he acknowledged, but there was nothing more he could think to say about that. "I should go call Gideon, tell him you're awake."

"Nnnh. Not for long. Tell him to wait a few more minutes before showing up." Dave realized he was still touching Aaron's arm, but he couldn't make himself let go.

"I'll send in more drugs before he gets here," Aaron said, smiling softly again. He slid off the bed, turning his arm under Dave's hand to get out from under it without jostling him, but then at the last minute slid his hand down the underside of Dave's arm to take his hand. He gave it a brief squeeze, then let go and started for the door.

Surprised at that touch, Dave managed to open his eyes just enough to watch Aaron go. "You'll come back?"

Aaron felt something in his chest tug funnily and he paused. God, this was trouble. But the way Dave sounded so needy made Aaron not want to leave at all. "Yeah," he said, glancing back.

Dave smiled. "See you, Hotshot."

***

Haley called the Sunday she was supposed to return to Virginia to tell Aaron that she was staying in Georgia another week. Maybe a little longer. She didn't need to tell him she was having second thoughts about moving. Aaron knew that without her needing to actually say the words. It was disappointing and it hurt. It _really_ hurt. But it wasn't entirely unexpected.

"She'll come around," he told Shithead as the cat headbutted his leg where he sat at Dave's kitchen table. He was eating cold chicken and telling himself he was only staying at Dave's place while Dave was in the hospital so he could look after the cat, but he knew damn well all he really needed to do was come over, make sure the cat had food and water, scoop its litter, and go home.

He told himself that he was sleeping in Dave's bed because Dave would have insisted he not sleep on the couch if he knew Aaron was staying too. It was probably true that Dave would have insisted if he knew Aaron was staying at the house, but Aaron knew that was as much a bullshit excuse as the other.

Still, he did it anyway. Every night he curled up under Dave's covers and then berated himself for it for it for a good thirty minutes before losing himself to restless sleep. When he woke up, he'd feel guilty, but he'd do it again the next night anyway. He told himself that if Haley was indulging the idea of leaving him after as long as they'd been together, he had a right to indulge himself in other thoughts too. Thoughts about Dave that he shouldn't be having. It was stupid... because he wasn't gay. But the thoughts still came on a regular basis anyway.

Lying there with Shithead curled up at his stomach and wondering if he was sleeping on Dave's "side" of the bed, though, he could easily see that the attraction Dave had for him wasn't as one-sided as Aaron wanted to believe. "Settle down," he told the cat. It was late and Aaron couldn't sleep, and he was blaming it on the cat moving around even though he knew it wasn't the cat's fault. Still, after Aaron placed a firm hand on it, it settled and purred and the noise and feel of the purring was soothing. It was another warm body that was enjoying his company, even if that body didn't happen to be human. He started to drift in and out of sleep.

Dave pulled into the dark parking lot and shut off the ignition, then just sat there for a minute with his eyes closed. It was very good to be home. Spending a week by yourself in a hospital five hundred miles from home wasn't anyone's idea of a good time, even if it wasn't exactly unusual for someone in his line of work. After a minute he sighed and got out of the car. It was late and he just wanted to go to bed. He left his ready bag in the car and headed up the steps to his apartment, moving carefully thanks to his still-healing ribs.

When he let himself in the apartment, he was surprised to see a suit jacket draped over the back of a chair. It had to be Aaron's; he knew he hadn't left anything out before flying out. "Where's Shithead?" he said, surprised the cat hadn't met him at the door. Usually it was twining around his ankles trying to trip him from the moment he got home.

Shrugging, he headed back for the bedroom, untucking and unbuttoning his shirt. When he got to the bedroom door, the little pieces added up into a whole that...made absolutely no sense. Aaron was sleeping in his bed. _Aaron_ was sleeping in his bed. Aaron was sleeping _in his bed_.

"What the hell?" Dave breathed, trying to ignore the little thrill that sight sent through him. He hadn't been expecting Aaron to _stay_ with Shithead. Not that he minded, of course, but... Well, what should he do now? He could wake Aaron up, which is what he probably _should_ do. He could sleep on the couch, which didn't sound appealing with broken ribs. Or he could climb in bed with Aaron and deal with it in the morning.

Dave stifled a yawn, dropped his clothes on the floor and crawled under the covers in just his boxers.

Aaron had roused slightly when he heard the door, but had drifted back to sleep quickly. Still, the dip in the bed under another person's weight woke him again. Mostly. "Mmph, Haley?" he murmured. "I thought you weren't coming ba--" He trailed off when it hit him that it _wouldn't_ be Haley at all. His eyes flew open. _Oh God_. He stayed silent for a long moment, trying to decide what to do. "Dave?" he finally whispered, not sure he really wanted an answer.

"They let me come home early," Dave said. "And I'm exhausted, so don't argue with me. Go back to--wait." He pushed himself up on one elbow, ignoring the way it twinged. "Haley's not coming back?"

Aaron sighed. "Not for another week at least." Now _he_ wanted to go back to sleep. Or leave. "Sorry, I thought I'd keep the cat company." _And it could keep **me** company_. "I can go." He started to shift to get up, realizing belatedly that he was in his boxers and an undershirt.

Dave reached out and pressed a hand against Aaron's chest. "Come on, Aaron, you're not stupid. You ought to realize I don't mind." He smiled slowly, knowing he shouldn't say what he was thinking, but wanting to distract Aaron from his obvious unhappiness about Haley. Not to mention Dave had a slight advantage here, if he wanted to press it. "Anyway, coming home to you in my bed is a very nice surprise."

Aaron settled back stiffly, and eventually rolled his head to face Dave. He could just make out the edges of Dave's expression, and it did something funny to him that dave was smiling at him like that. "I shouldn't," he murmured. He meant more that just staying here to sleep.

Dave left his hand where it was, but settled down on his good side. "Probably not," he whispered. "But you're here, aren't you?" He was pretty sure Aaron hadn't come here just to keep the cat company. It warmed Dave to know Aaron had felt more at home here than in his own place.

Aaron swallowed hard. "I suppose so." Aaron didn't move out of Dave's touch, enjoying the warm spot against his chest through the guilt of it. He told himself not to touch Dave back, but he quickly remembered how well that had gone last time. "I didn't know what to do with myself," he admitted.

Dave shifted a little closer, though he was trying to leave Aaron plenty of space. "You're always welcome here," he murmured. "Why isn't she coming back yet?" He smiled as Shithead settled down between their ankles, purring.

"She didn't say, but I think we both know the answer," Aaron murmured, and slid his hand over Dave's, inwardly cursing himself. 

Dave sucked in a breath, a flash of heat going all the way through his body when Aaron responded to that contact. "I'm so sorry, Aaron." He _was_ sorry--even if he disliked Haley, even if he thought Haley didn't really understand what made Aaron tick--because Aaron was obviously unhappy about it. It was strange. Aaron was a strong man, perfectly capable of taking care of himself, and yet Dave always felt an indefinable urge to protect Aaron.

Aaron shook his head. "It's not you." His shifted his hand and laced his fingers with Dave's, then swallowed and sighed, but didn't say what he was thinking.

"I still don't like to see you unhappy," Dave said quietly. He wanted to wrap his arms around Aaron, hold him close, just to offer some comfort. He knew he shouldn't. He knew what he was already doing was dangerous enough. He was flirting with heartbreak, there was no other word for it. It was in his power to hurt both of them, and maybe Haley, too...though she seemed to be doing a good job of hurting people herself. "Aaron."

Aaron didn't move for a moment, but he eventually licked his lips and turned to look at Dave, trying to ignore the little jolt of _something_ that went through him at the sound of his name spoken like that. "Yeah?"

Dave sighed. "You know how I feel about you. You can't _not_ know." _This is stupid,_ he told himself. _You're being an asshole._ He didn't care. He stroked his thumb over Aaron's and pushed himself up on his elbow again to look at Aaron. "Why haven't you told me to fuck off?" he whispered.

Aaron's eyebrows raised and lowered, and then he shook his head, his heart beating a funny irregular rhythm against his chest. "I haven't figured that part out yet," he admitted. God, this was uncomfortable. "Lie down. You're hurt."

_So are you_ , Dave thought as he obeyed. _It just isn't physical_. "Let me know when you figure it out," he said aloud.

Aaron nodded and ran his thumb along Dave's. "Okay."

Dave woke warm and content, snuggled up against Aaron. His ribs were aching thanks to the weight of Aaron's arm draped over them, but he didn't move. It would be difficult to move even if he wanted to; Shithead was curled up against the small of his back, so if Dave rolled away from Aaron, he'd squish the cat.

He let out a tiny sigh and shifted his head a little to ease a crick in his neck, and closed his eyes again. He liked the warmth of Aaron's shoulder against his cheek.

Aaron felt Dave shift and sucked in a deep breath. It felt incredibly good waking up in someone else's arms, even if it did cause a jolt of guilt and panic to sweep through him. He didn't move for a moment until he thought he could properly breath again to speak, which took a little longer than he thought. Then it took him a few more moments to convince himself that neither one of them could deny this, and that they both were aware there was something between them, even if they _wanted_ to deny it. "Morning," he murmured finally, and then promptly felt his breath leave him again.

"Morning," Dave whispered. He'd felt Aaron tense, then relax, but he wasn't jerking away and jumping out of bed. Dave slid a hand slowly up Aaron's arm, a careful exploration while he tried not to scare Aaron away. "Sleep all right?"

Aaron didn't say anything, he just nodded. Dave's hand was sending little shivers up his arm and down his spine, his pulse and breath quickening together.

"Me, too." Dave could feel Aaron responding to their closeness, and he spent a few moments telling himself this was a bad idea. He wasn't convinced. "I like waking up like this," he murmured, his hand slipping across Aaron's chest so Dave's thumb brushed at the dip in his collarbone, just above the neck of his undershirt.

Aaron drew a deep breath and held it. This was bad. Very Very Bad. He let his eyes flutter shut at the touch in spite of himself. "Mm-hmm."

Dave licked his lips. "Aaron," he breathed. He slid his hand up Aaron's neck to cup his cheek. He was about to cross the line. He wasn't sure if it would push Aaron over the edge or send him reeling back away from it. "Kiss me."

God, that sent an unexpected jolt of desire straight to Aaron's groin. he turned to look at Dave, feeling Dave's breath against his lips. "I--" He held Dave's gaze for a moment, feeling slightly ill just acknowledging how much he _wanted_ to do what Dave asked him to. "Dave," he breathed.

"You want this," Dave said quietly. "Or at least you want to be wanted. You want to be put first in someone's life. And you know I would. Kiss me."

"That's not a very good reason to kiss you... because if that _is_ the reason I want this, and... I _do_ want it... that's not fair to you," Aaron murmured.

"I think I can handle it," Dave said, brushing his thumb across Aaron's cheek. "Kiss me, Aaron."

Aaron shivered. It was difficult to try to think about Haley with Dave looking at him like that. Not to mention they both knew she was thinking about not coming back to Virginia. At that thought, Aaron inched in a bit so that his nose was brushing Dave's, and then hesitated again. "I shouldn't," he whispered, but a tiny part of him hoped Dave would kiss _him_ instead, so he could at least claim some sort of guilty innocence.

"I know," Dave replied. He held Aaron's gaze, his thumb stroking lightly down a jaw in need of a shave. When Aaron didn't pull away, Dave closed the distance between them, his lips eager but undemanding. A flash of heat went through him at the contact and he slid his fingers up into Aaron's hair.

That sent another spark of arousal through Aaron's entire body, and he kissed back automatically, sliding his arm more fully around Dave. His kiss was hesitant, almost teasing, and he felt like he was sinking just as much as he was soaring. _God_.

Dave let out a quiet noise and parted his lips, wanting to deepen the kiss. Dimly he was aware of a disgruntled miaow and a thump as Shithead left the bed. He ignored it, pressing closer to Aaron as their tongues met. He could feel Aaron's anxiety and tried to coax it away with strokes of his tongue. God, he'd wanted this for so many months now.

Aaron made a noise that was half-way between need and apprehension. His body wanted to give in--and part of his mind, if he was honest--but he couldn't stop thinking long enough to let it. He slid his fingers into Dave's hair, deepening the kiss for a moment, but when a jolt of lust ran through him at that, he sucked in a sharp breath and drew away. "I-- I shouldn't. I should go," he whispered quickly.

"I know," Dave managed, his breath coming fast. He didn't want Aaron to go. He wanted to kiss Aaron until all his protests faded. But he wasn't going to force this. Aaron wanted him, and Dave thought Aaron would choose him. But he wanted it to be a choice, not a seduction. So he let out a shuddery sigh and shifted back.

Aaron let out a shaky breath and let Dave go, then rolled onto his back. He almost couldn't believe he'd done what he had, except that he could, given the circumstances. "I'm sorry," he breathed, and threw the covers off himself, shifting to swing his legs off the edge of the bed.

Dave shook his head and rolled onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. "You don't owe me any apologies," he said quietly. _I'm playing with fire. I can't complain if I get burned._ He wasn't happy that Aaron was leaving, but he could understand.

"Yes, I do." Aaron ran his hand over his face and then dropped his head into his hands for a moment, his elbows on his knees. His was excited and hesitant to move at the moment, though his sudden overwhelming fear at what he might have just started--and possibly ruined--was starting to take its toll on his erection already.

Dave sighed and then reached out to rest his palm against Aaron's back. "I started this," he said. "I knew what I was doing, and that I shouldn't be doing it. Aaron, this isn't your fault."

"You're not to blame for my..." _Indiscretions_ , he almost said, but shut his mouth in time. "Stupidity," he said instead, and then pushed off the bed to find his clothes.

Stung, Dave let his hand fall to the bed and stared at Aaron's back. "Thanks," he muttered, pissed at himself for being hurt by that word. He'd meant what he said, too. He wanted to be with Aaron, but he _didn't_ blame Aaron for not wanting to cheat on the woman he'd been with since high school. And it _would_ be cheating, Dave couldn't gloss over that just because they weren't married and Haley wasn't all that supportive of Aaron's job. Dave closed his eyes and listened to the sounds of Aaron getting dressed.

Aaron paused when Dave responded, wondering if he should reply, but then started pulling his clothes on again. "You know what I meant," he mumbled.

"Aaron, this doesn't change anything," Dave said. "We're still friends, we're still partners...it's fine. I'm not angry. I don't blame you."

Aaron paused and nodded, looking up at Dave again. "I'll let myself out," he said, and turned to go. He got to the door before he felt guilty and turned around. "Are you okay? Do you need anything? Tylenol? Ice? ...A stiff drink?"

Dave shook his head. "I drove myself home from the airport, I think I can get Tylenol if I need it," he said, managing a faint smile. "I'll be fine. See you at work tomorrow?"

"Okay," Aaron said. He needed to get out of here. Fast. Before he walked back to the bed. "See you at work." He turned around and left, letting himself out the front door with the key Dave had given him to watch the cat. He would give it back at work.

*****

Dave was as good as his word. When he came back to work, he acted like everything was normal. He didn't pretend they hadn't kissed, but he didn't treat Aaron any differently than he had been. He still called him 'Hotshot' under his breath occasionally, just to make him smile, and he still partnered Aaron on cases. It was true that he declined an invitation to join Haley and Aaron for dinner the next time she could be bothered to visit, but he honestly thought the invitation had only been made out of politeness, anyway.

He'd given up on flirting with Doris, though, and didn't bother going out of his way to find some other girl to flirt with. He had to admit, he felt as though he'd gone into a holding pattern, like he was waiting to find out which way Haley would jump, so he could see whether he had a hope in hell of making a relationship with Aaron, or if he should start actively looking again for Wife Number Two.

"Here," he said, coming into the BAU late one May afternoon and slapping a stack of papers down on the desk he and Aaron shared. "Latest results of the custodials they're doing out at San Quentin. Oh, and a new case. Athens, Georgia. Thought you might want to take it."

Aaron glanced up from his desk to the papers, then took the custodials, leaving the Athens case where it was. He gave Dave an arch look that said _don't ask_. He wasn't overly close with his mother, and he and Haley weren't getting along very well right now either.

Dave shrugged. "Well, I guess I could go down by myself, but I already told Gideon we were on it." He'd thought maybe Aaron would _like_ a chance to work in state, maybe get an evening to spend with Haley. He pulled a chair over and sat down, flipping through the file. "Ten year old boy and two fourteen year old boys, all raped before being strangled." He shook his head.

Aaron drew a breath and turned to face Dave, letting their knees touch. He ignored it. He'd been trying to ignore everything he felt toward Dave lately. All they'd done was kiss, but Aaron felt awful anyway. Of course part of him wanted to do it again, and every time he spoke to Haley over the phone he was tempted to go to Dave's. Dave hadn't let him return the key. Of course, that only made it worse.

For her part, Haley's "visit" home had now lasted a month. She'd told the school she was supposed to be working at that something had come up and she'd be able to start the following fall. Aaron and Haley had only ever split once before, and it obviously hadn't been this serious in high school. And Aaron was now, for all intents and purposes, living alone for the first time in his life. 

Generally speaking, he was lonely. And miserable. And work, as gruesome as it could be, had turned into the highlight of his days. He knew Dave saw it. He was fairly certain _Gideon_ saw it too, but at least no one was prying.

He let his eyes travel over the faces of the young boys in the photographs. The first ones smiling and happy, while the second ones were cold--little boys buried in shallow, red-clay graves. Aaron nodded. "When does the plane leave?"

"Plane?" Dave snorted. "Remember that memo about cutting costs a couple weeks ago? This one's close enough, Gideon said we can drive. Never mind it's a good eight hours of driving." He shook his head. "They've been giving him grief over budget expenses, I guess. I don't know why our department. At least we're not all demanding PCs or something."

"Great. Stuck with you and Gideon in a car together for eight hours," Aaron said, rolling his eyes. Of course, it really wasn't that so much as the fact that evidence could degrade quickly--witnesses who saw something a little out of place might forget the details, fingerprints could be wiped away, by accident or with intent. The first hours after any murder were the most crucial to be able to investigate. He took one of the pictures from Dave and frowned at it.

"You should be so lucky," Dave said, pulling a fresh notebook out of one of the desk drawers. "Gideon's got a court date in Philadelphia in two days. Something about the serial arsonist case he consulted on. Just you and me this time, Hotshot." He grinned and added some fresh pencils to his briefcase. "The bad news is, we have to take a company car. Nothing very sporty in the pool, I'm afraid."

Aaron expelled a breath that was almost a laugh and started picking up his own things as well. "Shotgun."

"Oh, so you're letting me drive." Dave's grin widened. "Excellent. Maybe we'll make it in less than eight hours." He winked and shut the desk drawer. "Come on, Aaron, aren't you ready yet?" He slapped Aaron lightly on the shoulder and headed for the door. As he went past Gideon's office, he said, more quietly, "I'll behave myself."

Aaron shook his head and stood, grabbing his briefcase. He almost didn't hear what Dave said to Gideon, but the sound carried just enough, and Aaron sighed and started toward the door, giving Gideon a wave goodbye without actually looking up.


	3. Chapter 3

It was nearly ten o'clock when they arrived in Athens, Georgia, and they spent the next forty minutes trying to find a hotel room before they managed one room in a dumpy no-tell-motel with one-inch gaps under the room doors and crappy water pressure. Dave was just grateful the room actually had two beds.

"Next time I'll check graduation schedules before taking a case in a university town," he promised Aaron, and waited for him to pick which bed he wanted.

" _Dave_ \--" Aaron started, and then shook his head and tossed his ready bag on the farthest bed from the door. He sat on the edge and rubbed his eyes for a moment.

"Hey, I'm sorry. You know, I thought you'd _like_ to be in Georgia. We've never had a case this close to Atlanta. You could see your family." Dave sighed and threw his bag on his bed, then dropped down next to it. "I didn't set out to piss you off."

"You didn't piss me off," Aaron said quickly. "I'm not overly close to my mother, and my brother's in New York." He knew he'd just blatantly left Haley out, but a moment later he realized that in the months he and Dave had known each other, they'd neither one ever talked about family, aside from Dave's ex-wife, if she could be counted. Not that Aaron _wanted_ to talk family, but that was beside the point.

"Dad not around?" Dave asked, glancing at him. He really wanted something to drink, but he had a feeling the tap water would taste like piss, and he didn't have the energy to go looking for a vending machine yet. "Anyway, Haley's here. Well, in this state."

"We're barely talking," Aaron said, and wondered if he should say anything about the dad question. He didn't mind telling Dave his father was dead, but it was possible he might sound a little too happy about it if he did.

"You and your dad?" Dave asked, though he had a feeling Aaron had meant Haley. He knew things had been getting bad between them--he'd known that since the day he and Aaron had kissed. But he'd been unwilling to ask, and Aaron hadn't volunteered the information before now.

Aaron expelled an unhappy laugh. "My dad is rotting in his grave." He pulled the case file out of his bag and shifted on the bed to prop his legs up and leaned back against the headboard. He'd gone over the thing a million times in the car, but it was easier to look at the papers inside than Dave.

Dave went still for a moment. "Ah." And he'd apparently found both a sore spot and possibly the reason Aaron was a profiler, all by accident. "Need a Coke? I thought I'd look for a vending machine."

Aaron drew a deep breath. He was cranky and moody; he needed to relax. He shifted slightly where he was sitting, and then dropped his head back. "Yeah, sure," he mumbled.

"I'll bring you something back," Dave promised. He headed out along the outside of the building looking around. He'd hoped they would get a nice hotel, and had brought Haley's phone number with him; he'd planned to call her, have her show up and surprise Aaron at his room. That wasn't exactly going to happen in this joint. You didn't even _tell_ your wife you stayed at a place like this, let alone invite her to share it with you. Seeing the tell-tale red glow of a Coke machine, he headed over to buy a few.

Aaron opened his eyes and watched the door click shut, then looked at his bag. His phone was inside it, and the last thing he really _wanted_ to do was call Haley. But he knew he should. It was just difficult to keep trying to make this work, trying to patch things up, to make up for his mistake with Dave (even if he hadn't told her what happened), when all she seemed to want to do was avoid it. That much was clear by the way she hadn't come back to Virginia.

After a moment, he sighed and pulled the zipper of his bag open anyway, and fished out his phone. After a moment's hesitation, he hit her speed dial number, hoping he wasn't waking her up.

She answered after four rings. "Hello?" She sounded unhappy, though he couldn't tell whether she'd been asleep.

"Hey," Aaron said, keeping his tone light in case he _had_ actually woken her. "Did I wake you up?"

"Aaron." Her voice softened. "No, I wasn't sleeping, I was just reading in bed. How are you?"

"I'm okay," he said, and his shoulders relaxed at her tone. He smiled softly. "I'm in Athens, actually. I would have called sooner, but we've been driving all day."

There was silence for a moment. "You mean you're in Georgia? You're _here_? What are you doing here?"

Aaron frowned, but kept calm. "I'm on a case." He didn't say any more, trying to judge why she didn't seem very happy.

Another brief silence. "Oh. Will you have time to come see me? I've missed you so much, Aaron." Her voice warmed again. "Everyone's missed you."

"I hope so. It's late tonight, but maybe tomorrow night?" Aaron shifted down on the bed, ignoring how hard it was. "I miss you too. The house is too big for just me," he said, his smile growing warmer.

She sighed. "I hate being without you, Aaron. I hate thinking about you alone up there."

Aaron breathed a soft laugh, surprised at how good this felt, to hear her say she missed him. "There's an easy way to fix that," he suggested.

"I know," she said quietly. He heard her take a breath, then she said, "Come back home, Aaron. Come back here. I talked to Greg, he said he's kept a place open for you. You can have your old job back. Everyone wants you to come back."

As quickly as the good feeling came, it went. " _Haley_ \--"

"Please, Aaron! All my friends are here. All _your_ friends are here. You had a good job. A great job. We were so happy. I never understood why you had to go!"

Aaron sat up and propped his head in his hand, his elbows against his knees. "Haley, I know it's a bit of an adjustment, but you've known for a long time that this is what I wanted to do. I don't understand what there is to understand that I haven't already explained."

"Maybe you could explain how your _job_ is more important to you than _I am_ ," she said, her tone heating. "Or why _I_ have to be the one to make all the sacrifices so you can be happy!"

"You don't think I'm sacrificing anything?" Aaron snapped, suddenly on the defensive when her tone changed yet again. "You think I _want_ you angry at me, living in another state, barely speaking to me? Do you think it's been easy for me alone, dealing with the things I see on a daily basis and not having someone to come home to?" He stood and started to pace, then forced his voice to calm. "You could have a job in _any_ school district in this country, but the _only_ job _I want_ is only at Quantico."

"Oh, my God, not this again! Aaron, you're a lawyer! _You_ could practice law in _any_ district in this country, too!" He could hear the tears threatening in her voice, and wondered if they were tears of anger or unhappiness. "Why can't we just stay in Georgia and settle down? We could have kids! We could be happy!"

Dave had walked around outside for a while, stretching his legs and giving Aaron some time to himself, but the mosquitoes were out, and he was tired of slapping at them, so he'd finally decided to take the sweating Coke cans inside. Maybe he'd take a shower if Aaron was still cranky, just to give them both a little more time apart.

"Hey, I found a Coke machine. Only cans, though--" he began, then saw that Aaron had the phone to his ear.

"I've told you before that I'm not ready for kids. And before you say it, I _know_ how old I am, and I'm _well aware_ that neither of us are getting any younger!" Aaron said angrily, almost missing that Dave had walked in the room. When the door clicked shut, he glanced over, drew a steadying breath, and slumped against the wall. "We could be happy in Virginia too, if you'd give it more than a couple of weeks," he said, his voice almost too calm.

Dave's eyebrows shot up as he began debating the wisdom of just turning around and going back out to take his chances with the mosquitoes. He set the cans on the table and made a beeline for the bathroom instead. He'd just...hide in there...until they were done arguing.

Even after he shut the door, he could hear Aaron's voice, though. He wanted to offer support or even comfort somehow, but he knew better than to get involved in a domestic dispute. He sighed and sat on the edge of the tub, rubbing his forehead.

Aaron sighed. "It's been over a month, Haley, and we need to figure out what this means for us, because neither one of us can keep on the way it is... I'm not moving back." His stomach twisted at the words, waiting for her response, but he knew he _meant_ what he said anyway.

"What this _means_ for us?" Her voice went up. "Aaron, there hardly _is_ an _us_ any more! It's you in Virginia and me in Georgia and a God-damned whole day's drive in between! I can't keep doing this! And I hate Virginia! I hate those horrible smug government-wife teachers and your stupid arrogant asshole partner! I don't want you to end up collapsing in some hotel room a thousand miles from home or getting shot and having to spend a week in the hospital in Detroit, for God's sake! Why can't you just have a normal job where no one's trying to kill you?"

"'Horrible smug government-wife teachers'?! Oh, well let's try not to make rash judgement calls," Aaron snapped back, not repeating what she called Dave in case he could hear, though it made him even angrier. "You gave it _two weeks_! And nobody's trying to kill me, Haley, but a lot of innocent people are dying, and I'd rather stop it _before_ it gets to the courts!"

"At least I'm going into this rationally instead of jumping with both feet!" Haley retorted. "You just threw away everything to grasp at some chance of playing the hero and catching bad guys! One of us has to be the _adult_ , Aaron!" He heard a muffled noise as if Haley had her hand over the phone. "God, I told her this wasn't going to work," she said, her voice distorted. Then she came back loud and clear. "I don't want to live in Virginia. If you want me to live with you, you'll have to come to Georgia."

Aaron just stood there for a moment, feeling like the floor had fallen out from under him. This was it? This was it. He swallowed hard. "How can you... accuse _me_ of being the irrational one, when...?" He shook his head and straightened, the words he'd heard that she hadn't meant him to weighing heavy on his mind. She was trying to win this argument in the most manipulative way possible. He wouldn't let her win that way. "I'm not moving back. I told you that," he said finally, his voice tired but firm.

She was silent for so long he wondered if she'd hung up on him. Finally he heard a little gasp. "Aaron," she whispered. God, she was crying. "Aaron, don't do this. Please, I'm so tired of fighting."

Aaron swallowed hard. He wished she'd stop sniffling, and somewhere in the back of his mind he wondered if this was part of the plan. "So am I. So I'm telling you that I'm not moving back. That's it. That's all there is left to say, Haley. I love you, and I want you, but I want you to give Virginia a real shot for me. And if you're going to fight with me, I want you to at least start fighting fairly."

"Fairly!" she burst out. "Aaron--" She cut off, then made an angry noise. "I can't talk about this any more tonight. I just...I just can't. I'm sorry. I have to go, Aaron."

Aaron opened his mouth, but the phone clicked off a second before he even formed words. He was tempted to throw his phone across the room, but instead he just gripped it hard in his hand for a moment, and then expelled a long breath. Dave was still in the bathroom. Aaron didn't know whether to acknowledge he was done on the phone or not. He wasn't sure he wanted to face Dave right now at all.

Dave lifted his head when Aaron went quiet out in the other room. He wasn't sure if that meant the argument was over or if it just meant the argument had lost volume. A tiny, mean part of him was _glad_ Aaron had stood up to Haley like that, especially the part about not leaving the BAU. He tried to squash it. He hadn't realized things were so bad between them. Finally he sighed and opened the door a few inches.

"Aaron?" he said quietly.

"She hung up," Aaron said by way of answering. He pushed away from the wall and walked numbly to his bed, collapsing against the rock-hard mattress.

Dave sighed and went out into the room, sitting on his own bed and watching Aaron. "God, I'm so sorry about all of this," he said. He felt, irrationally, as if it were his fault. He knew it wasn't. He knew an opportunity when he saw one, and he wouldn't be afraid to take it, but he hadn't _forced_ Haley to be such a bitch about Aaron's career. Still, irrational or not, the guilt was there.

"Stop apologizing for her behavior," Aaron mumbled against the pillow. He had an irrational desire to crawl over to Dave's bed. He told himself it was out of stress, and it wouldn't be fair to use Dave for comfort. Even if, technically, the only reason he hadn't done anything more with Dave was because of Haley.... which apparently wasn't an issue anymore, for all intents and purposes.

"I'm not apologizing for her," Dave said. He told himself not to move. Which meant he immediately got up and sat on Aaron's bed, resting a hand on his shoulder. "I just hate seeing you like this. You deserve to be happy. Hell, you deserve a medal for the work you do."

Aaron snorted. "I do the same work you do." He was glad Dave moved, and he hesitated a moment, then shifted to take Dave's hand. He curled his fingers around it and brought it down to his lips, stroking a thumb over the back of it.

That sent a shock of heat through Dave, who just stared at Aaron, unable to think. God, he really hadn't touched Aaron to try anything. He just wanted to offer comfort, to let him know someone was on his side. Dave felt like he couldn't quite breathe. "Maybe I deserve a medal, too, then," he mumbled finally.

Aaron closed his eyes and drew a deep breath, feeling the heat of it against Dave's hand when he exhaled. They hadn't touched like this since the night they'd spent in Dave's bed, and Aaron _knew_ it was sudden, but it had been a long time since anyone had comforted him, and he needed it. God, he shouldn't do this to Dave right now, not when this could all be a stress reaction to the fight he'd just had. "Dave," he murmured.

"God, Aaron," Dave breathed, staring at him. His throat felt tight. He wasn't entirely sure if he wanted to kiss Aaron or just wrap his arms around him and tell him everything would be all right. After a moment he sighed and pushed his shoes off, then shifted around so he could lie down next to him. "I'm here."

Aaron didn't open his eyes. His heart was racing as he felt Dave's weight shift, and there was a tiny part of him that was still terrified of this, but the part that needed Dave was stronger. "I know. You've been here the whole time." _Haley hasn't. She left._ Aaron swallowed and tightened his hand on Dave's, then he kicked his ready bag off the bed without even opening his eyes to see where it went. "Stay here tonight."

Dave's chest felt like it had been squeezed. _Aaron shouldn't hurt like this_ , he thought, and then he leaned in and pressed his lips to Aaron's, gently, more a promise than a real kiss. _I'll always be here_.

Aaron returned the almost chaste kiss, and when Dave started to pull back, Aaron looped a hand around Dave's neck and pulled him in for a real kiss. His lips were soft against Dave's, but his kisses were full of months' worth of repressed desire. He knew it was needy, doing this _now_. He was trying not to care, but _couldn't_ not care. "I'm sorry," he breathed between kisses. "I shouldn't do this now, not after that." Another hungry kiss. "I know." He slid his fingertips into Dave's hair, feeling like once he started, he just couldn't _stop_ kissing Dave.

Dave let his eyes fall closed slowly, but he opened them again after a moment, watching Aaron as they kissed. "If I can give you something you need," he murmured huskily, "then I want to." It might be the closest he would ever come to saying words he was afraid he might never be able to say to Aaron-- _I love you_. They were true, but... He kissed Aaron again, hungrily, shifting so his body was angled over Aaron's.

"I need you," Aaron breathed, and pulled Dave closer, against his chest, deepening their kiss and sliding his hand down Dave's side. God, it felt good to be wanted, to have someone touch him that seemed to need him as much as he needed them. And he knew, without question, that Dave respected him above anything else. "It's over," he breathed. Neither he or Haley had said those exact words, but it had been stated in enough other ways that Aaron knew it was true. He knew it _would_ be said the next time they talked.

Dave closed his eyes for a moment, then planted a trail of kisses along Aaron's jaw. "Aaron," he murmured, an acknowledgment of his regret, but with a world of desire in that single word. He knew Haley was what had stopped Aaron before; he wasn't surprised that once it was over, Aaron would turn to him. He'd never been sure that he would ever actually _have_ Aaron, though. "God, I want you so much," he whispered.

"I know," Aaron said, and pulled Dave on top of him fully, letting Dave feel his body's excitement. His fingers started to work open Dave's buttons even as he tilted his chin, offering Dave more of his jaw and neck.

Dave let out a faint whimper at the feel of Aaron's arousal against him. "I've wanted you for so long." Dave licked and sucked at Aaron's neck, sliding a hand into his hair. He shifted so their groins were aligned, wanting Aaron to know how much he wanted him. "Aaron."

"Dave," Aaron gasped, thrusting up against Dave automatically. This was strange--very strange--and for a presumably straight man, Aaron was incredibly aroused by this. Not that he hadn't known he wanted Dave for a while, but the physical side of it still worried him a little. It was almost with a sense of amusement that he realized most of that fear was trickling away quickly under the ministrations of Dave's mouth and the knowledge that he was allowed to do this now.

"Mmm." Dave scraped his teeth lightly across Aaron's skin, his breath coming faster as desire washed through him. Aaron was so strong, so handsome, and he wanted this, wanted Dave. "Sexy," he murmured, one hand slipping between them to work at Aaron's tie.

Aaron chuckled softly, his fingers brushing across Dave's chest as he bared it, then pushing it off his shoulders. "Just... shut up and fuck me," he breathed, sliding his fingers under the back of Dave's pants.

"God." Dave pulled back a little and stared at Aaron, half shocked and half aroused. It seemed abrupt, and he didn't really appreciate being told to shut up. But maybe that was what Aaron needed. Dave had said he just wanted to be whatever Aaron needed. _God, you've got it bad_ , he told himself, but he just smiled slowly at Aaron and leaned in for a hard, hungry kiss.

Aaron hadn't really expected Dave to pull back like he did, and he blinked at Dave for a moment before he realized maybe that hadn't been the best thing to say. "Sorry," he murmured. He reached a hand up and trailed a finger over Dave's lower lip. "I don't need you to tell me I'm sexy; I'd rather you show me." That, and he really did just need to lose himself in this physical pleasure with someone who cared about him, and he cared about too.

Dave met Aaron's gaze and flicked his tongue out to taste Aaron's finger. He caught it gently between his teeth, still watching Aaron's face, and closed his lips to suck. If Aaron wanted to be shown, Dave could do that. He worked his tongue around the tip of Aaron's finger, his heated gaze a promise. _I want you_. Aaron knew that, of course. Aaron had known it for months by now. Dave just didn't see any reason to rush things too much.

Aaron drew a shaky breath. He was, apparently, much more ready for a frantic fuck than Dave was. Which was surprising. And a little confusing--not because he didn't already know Dave respected him and had wanted him for long enough that he might want to savor this, but mostly because this was happening so quickly after Aaron's fight with Haley that Aaron wasn't sure how to quite compartmentalize his feelings when it came to Dave and Haley. Or was that Dave versus Haley? Or Haley versus Dave? Taking this slowly meant thinking about things like that.

He licked his lips and watched Dave's lips around his finger. "Dave," he breathed, wanting to say all of that, but not willing to ruin this, or possibly end it all together.

There was confusion in Aaron's eyes. Dave cursed himself when it registered. Maybe he'd given away too much. Maybe there had been too much affection and too little lust in his expression. Maybe... _Oh, you idiot_ , Dave realized belatedly. _He's **thinking**. That's the last thing he needs._ He released Aaron's finger and caught Aaron's mouth with his own. "What was it you said?" he murmured when the kiss ended. "Shut up and fuck you?"

Aaron moaned softly into the kiss, his fingers splaying over Dave's chest. "If that's not what you want, Dave..."

" _You're_ what I want, Aaron." Dave murmured. He ran a hand down Aaron's side to rest at his hip. "You're all I've wanted for months." He kissed Aaron again, harder, nipping at his lower lip. "Been dying to fuck you since that first case." Hopefully it didn't sound like a pep talk, but saying the words aloud definitely got Dave more into the spirit of shutting up and fucking. He tugged at Aaron's shirt, wanting him naked.

Aaron moaned at Dave's words when they sent a thrill of desire through him. He shifted to let Dave tug his shirt off. He wrapped his arms around Dave, arching up under him and kissing him hard, sincerely hoping Dave would take the lead here without Aaron having to ask. He didn't think he really had to tell Dave he hadn't done this before. "Yes," he breathed.

That was a great reaction. Dave smiled and held Aaron tightly for a moment, relishing the feel of him in his arms. "You need a good hard fuck," Dave murmured in his ear, his voice husky with desire. He fumbled at Aaron's pants, getting the fly undone and nudging his hips.

Aaron let his eyes flutter shut and shifted to help Dave pull his pants open and whimpering at Dave's words. The breath in his ear sent shivers through him. That was _exactly_ what he needed, to be reminded he was wanted and that this was _different_ from everything he'd had before. His fingers curled into Dave's hair tightly. "Yes," he said again, the word coming out breathless. "Dave."

"I want you naked," Dave murmured, his lips ghosting up Aaron's jaw as he spoke. He tugged Aaron's boxers and pants down together, his gaze greedy as he took in the sight of Aaron Hotchner, naked and wanting. He shifted back to get out of the rest of his own clothes, not looking away.

"God," Aaron breathed at the sight of Dave. Dave _naked_ and obviously aroused. Aaron opened his eyes to speak, but then didn't have a clue what to say and shut his mouth. His breath was shaky, but rather than speak, he drew his hand down Dave's body to his hip, tracing a line down the jut of hip bone there. "Dave," he whispered.

There were two choices. Ask what was wrong, or press forward and see how Aaron reacted. Dave covered Aaron's hand with his, then leaned in to kiss him again. "Shh. Don't talk," he murmured, and reached down to curl his hand around Aaron's cock.

Aaron was enormously thankful for that, and moaned softly against Dave's lips when Dave's hand started to move. He'd tensed slightly, but could feel the touch of Dave's lips and hands uncoiling him again, and he trailed his hand lower, drawing his hand closer to Dave's erection.

"Want you so much," Dave whispered against Aaron's mouth. "I want to be inside you, Aaron." He flicked his thumb across the head of Aaron's cock as he spoke, then resumed stroking. He kissed him hard.

Dave's kiss swallowed Aaron's moan, and Aaron finally reached low enough to grip Dave's cock. And it was strange, but good and Aaron squeezed lightly and then matched Dave's rhythm on him, leaning up into Dave's kiss. "Mmm-hmm," he hummed, and felt his heart rate soar.

That sent a flash of lust through Dave. He made a noise in his throat and shifted, nudging Aaron's legs apart and settling between them. He didn't want to hurt Aaron, but this had to be as mindless as he could make it, getting Aaron swept up in the passion and pleasure and not thinking. "God, you're so fucking hot," he murmured, nibbling along Aaron's jaw.

Aaron let out a breathy laugh. "Ah, mm, you don't have to say that," he managed to murmured, but he shifted into Dave's hand, willing himself to pay more attention to the pleasure he was feeling instead of the way Dave had shifted. He licked his lips and wrapped a leg around one of Dave's. _Be careful_ , he thought, but that sounded idiotic... and part of him _wanted_ it to hurt-- _just a little_. Part of him needed catharsis.

"S'truth," Dave said, and licked Aaron's throat. He hadn't been lying when he said he would behave himself. He hadn't planned this, didn't even have condoms, let alone lubrication. Unprotected sex was dumb, but he had a feeling Aaron had only ever been with Haley, and Dave had always been careful before. Aaron was worth the risk. He lifted his head and kissed Aaron deeply, then turned his head and spit into his hand to slick his fingers. "You're gorgeous." He kissed Aaron again as he stroked his hand down a muscular thigh to his ass. Trying to pay careful attention to Aaron's reactions, despite his own growing passion, Dave pressed a finger lightly to his entrance.

Aaron opened his mouth to tell Dave to shut up again--this time with more warmth in his tone--but the words caught in his throat when Dave spit, knowing exactly what that meant. His breath was short by the time Dave actually reached his entrance, and he had a brief moment where all he could think was _what the hell am I **doing**?!_ He tried to steady his breath and closed his eyes, pressing his head back against the pillow.

"Relax," Dave murmured, dropping feather-light kisses across Aaron's cheek. "Trust me." He pressed inside, just enough to let Aaron start getting used to the sensation. He felt suddenly like the pace would drive him crazy. He wanted to _fuck_ , but Aaron needed time and preparation.

"I--" Aaron started, and then gasped softly as Dave's finger passed inside him. "Nngh," he managed, not quite getting out the 'I do trust you' he'd meant to say at first, but managing it a moment later. "I... do," he murmured breathlessly. The sting of it wasn't bad, and Aaron threaded his fingers into Dave's hair. "Fuck, Dave..."

Dave breathed a chuckle and turned his head to kiss Aaron's ear. "That's the idea," he murmured, and pressed in a little further.

"Yeah," Aaron found himself agreeing, then turned his head to catch Dave's lips in a kiss that was almost too soft. He moaned softly and pushed down a bit, getting used to the intrusion faster than expected.

Dave explored Aaron's mouth, keeping the kiss gentle, and turned his finger a little, trying to find Aaron's prostate. Pleasure would do more to unlock Aaron's body than all the patience and tenderness. And Aaron had said to shut up and fuck him, after all. God, this was incredible. Dave kept half-expecting the phone to ring and interrupt this.

Aaron sucked in a breath when Dave's finger twisted, and then a shock of lust surged through his body when Dave's finger hit the right spot. He moaned loudly, forgetting the awkwardness of this, the newness, the sting... forgetting everything but the way his body was responding to that touch. "More," he breathed, kissing Dave again with renewed hunger.

God, that was fantastic. Dave laughed softly, more from happiness than amusement. "Eager," he murmured, and stroked his finger against that spot again before sliding out. He spit again, then two fingertips were pressing inside as he watched Aaron's expression.

"Shut-- up--" Aaron managed breathlessly in reply, wishing he could sound playfully irritated, but not managing it at all. He made a strangled noise at the stretch and curled his fingers hard against Dave's hip, whimpering softly.

"It's great," Dave said, and explored Aaron's mouth with his tongue as he worked his fingers inside Aaron. He liked how much Aaron was enjoying this, how he was (understandably) a little anxious, but not shy.

Aaron's breath was ragged; he was enjoying both the pleasure and the pain of this, how new and different it was. He reached down and gripped Dave's cock again. God, Dave was hard. "Want you," he whispered... and it was maybe too soon, but Aaron didn't really care at the moment.

The words sent a surge of pure desire through Dave, and he groaned. They were possibly making a colossal mistake, but he wasn't going to be the one to back down. He'd wanted this too long. "Yes, Aaron," he breathed, and slid his fingers out. More spit, this time to slick his cock, and then he positioned himself, watching Aaron. "It'll be uncomfortable at first," he murmured, brushing his nose along Aaron's cheek.

Aaron closed his eyes, trying to calm himself even as his heart tried to beat out of his chest. He turned his cheek into Dave's, breathing heavily against his jaw and neck. "I don't care," he whispered.

"Remember to breathe," Dave advised, and pressed in slowly, trying to give Aaron time to adjust. He whimpered faintly at the molten pleasure it sent through his body, his breath ragged against Aaron's skin.

Aaron started to hum a response, but then he just sucked in a sharp breath as Dave passed inside him. He clenched his jaw at the burn of it, his fingers curling into Dave's side and his breath coming in short gasps. "Dave," he managed--but this was exactly what he needed, every nerve on fire with some sensation or another, reminding him he could still feel. "Don't stop," he whispered, his voice shaky, and turned to kiss Dave.

"Okay?" Dave breathed when the kiss ended. "I don't want to hurt you." He kissed Aaron again when he nodded. "God," he breathed, and pressed in until they were settled together. He paused then, breathing hard. "Aaron."

Their chests were rising and falling fast against one another, and Aaron clung to Dave. He was somewhere between wonder at the sheer fact he was doing what he was and the intensity of the way it _felt_ , the fullness of another man inside him. Of _Dave_ inside him. "Oh, God," he moaned, still sounding a little weak. "Dave."

"Gorgeous," Dave panted, stroking his fingers across Aaron's cheek. "Aaron." He kissed Aaron hungrily, his mouth demanding, as he rocked his hips in slow, deliberate almost-thrusts. He suspected Aaron didn't want time to get used to it; he wanted to _feel_. 

"Mmph, David," Aaron panted, making a little noise of pleasure-discomfort as Dave moved, but then just deepened their kiss.

Dave let out a moan that was swallowed in Aaron's kiss. He didn't change his rhythm until he felt Aaron's body loosening a little, adjusting to the sensations going through him. Then he began to actually thrust, pulling mostly out before pushing in again, still going slowly.

Aaron could feel the tension--and, with it, the traces of pain left in this--draining out of him as Dave moved, and for a moment it was renewed when Dave started to push in earnest, but Aaron's body was starting to tingle with the pleasure of this more and more. He moaned loudly, pressing his head back against the pillow and shifting down against Dave's thrusts a bit.

"Yes," Dave panted, letting his thrusts gain in speed. He shifted his angle, stroking his hand along Aaron's side to his hip, then sliding between them to curl around his cock. _Let yourself enjoy this_ , he thought, watching Aaron's face eagerly.

"Oh," Aaron moaned, feeling a spike of arousal sweep through his body. He shifted to get his knee up over Dave's hip and let out a little cry at the way that shifted the angle and everything about the way this felt.

God, that was amazing. Dave smiled, thrusting deeper and exulting in the noises Aaron made. He was so sexy, wrapped up in pleasure like this. Dave could feel enjoyment spreading through his own body, building as his rhythm sped up.

"Yes!" Aaron gasped, the new force breaking apart his reserve. He threw his hand up against the headboard when it hit the wall hard the first time, pinning it against the wall to keep it still, and then used the leverage to push down against Dave more, losing himself in the heat and need coursing through him.

Dave let out a low cry at the way Aaron moved against him, his control slipping just a little. He sped his hand on Aaron's cock, trying to match the rhythm of his thrusts. He spared a single thought to hope they didn't have neighbors, then got caught up in the way their bodies moved together.

"Nnnngh," was all Aaron could manage, his toes curling, his body arching under Dave in pleasure as Dave's hand forced his breathing to speed even more. It was amazing giving himself over like this, something he'd _never_ done before, never had the opportunity to do... and never would have trusted anyone to do before now. "Dave!" he gasped. "So-- so-- Mmmm..."

"Gorgeous," Dave managed, completing Aaron's sentence for him. He smiled warmly at Aaron, then leaned in for a kiss, flicking his thumb across the head of Aaron's cock as he did. He could feel the desire pooling low in his body, the coiling in his muscles that meant climax was approaching. He wanted to wait Aaron out, but he wasn't sure if he'd be able to at this rate.

Aaron gasped when Dave's thumb slicked through the precome at the head of his cock, a surge of need cutting through the haze of sensation thrumming through Aaron's body. He'd almost forgotten himself, overwhelmed by the slide of Dave inside him and the press of their bodies. "Yes," he agreed, breathless.

"Oh, God, Aaron--" Dave managed, his thrusts growing more desperate. It was too much, too good after wanting this for so long. He abandoned himself to the pleasure, straining after his own climax. He was so close. He leaned in for another hot, hungry kiss, then let out a long groan as he came, Aaron's name on his lips.

Aaron swallowed Dave's moan, a burst of excitement going through him at the feel of Dave coming inside him (followed by a brief flash of heat at the realization that he hadn't even _thought_ about a condom). Aaron moaned softly when Dave stilled, liking the feeling of Dave inside him, slick with his release. His fingers stroked down Dave's back. "Dave," he murmured, trying to catch his breath.

"Oh, God, God," Dave mumbled, letting his forehead rest against Aaron's neck. He'd stopped stroking Aaron's cock in the throes of orgasm, and when he realized it, he began stroking again, but slower, taking the time to tease and explore with his thumb.

Aaron shivered when Dave's interest in his arousal renewed, and he threaded his fingers into Dave's hair, his focus zeroing in on his own need once all the other new sensation stopped. God he needed to come, and now Dave was slowing down. Not that it wasn't understandable, but still... "Oh," he whispered, his breath catching when Dave's thumb slid across his slit. "Please."

Dave opened his eyes and nuzzled Aaron's neck, kissing and then sucking at the salty skin. "So gorgeous," he murmured, and shifted, then slipped out of Aaron. He pulled away, glanced at Aaron's face for a moment, then moved down, lowering his head to take Aaron's cock in his mouth in one movement. He swirled his tongue around the heated flesh, tasting the precome.

Aaron gasped and immediately fisted his fingers in Dave's hair. "God!" he moaned, shifting into Dave's mouth. The shock of how quickly that happened had Aaron on the edge already, and God, Dave's tongue was wonderful. _Haley never-- No_. Aaron clamped his eyes shut and tried to catch his breath and push away that thought. "Fuck-- so good," he murmured.

Dave made a noise of acknowledgment, liking that reaction. He sucked enthusiastically, bobbing his head and working his tongue against Aaron's length. For all that he liked women, he'd never particularly enjoyed oral sex with women. Sucking cock came more naturally, and was frankly more enjoyable. Particularly when he could wring noises like that out of a man like Aaron Hotchner. He teased his fingers up Aaron's inner thigh and stroked his balls.

Aaron moaned again and squirmed under Dave, and if he hadn't already been touched, it would have been almost embarrassing how quickly Dave was pushing him towards climax. "God, God, yes," he babbled, his hand on the back of Dave's head, uselessly trying to hold off to enjoy this a little longer.

Pleased, Dave hummed, squeezing lightly at Aaron's balls. It was incredibly hot the way Aaron was coming apart under his ministrations. Dave hummed again, knowing how that would feel against Aaron's cock.

Aaron let out a long, breathy noise when Dave hummed, the feeling of it sweeping through his already tingling body and pushing him close to the edge. "I'm going to come," he warned, straining to hold on just a moment more to let Dave pull away if he wanted.

Dave laughed and sucked harder. The brief, uncharitable thought flashed through his head that Haley must never have done this much, but he pushed it away. He squeezed again gently, glancing up towards Aaron's face.

Aaron made a strangled noise when Dave laughed, his fingers tightening in Dave's hair when it was clear Dave wasn't going to pull away. All the tightness in his body came to a focus and he came hard, pulsing into Dave's mouth with a groan. When he was spent, he collapsed back against the bed, sated and panting softly.

That? was magnificent. Dave swallowed and licked Aaron clean, still breathing hard. Then he slid up along Aaron's body and settled on the mattress next to him, stroking a hand idly over Aaron's heaving chest. He was so beautiful, with his expression that open, his body bare to Dave's gaze.

"God, you need to do that more often," Aaron breathed, feeling like he couldn't move and not opening his eyes.

Dave laughed and kissed Aaron's shoulder. "That's easily arranged," he murmured, resting his head on the pillow next to Aaron's. His gaze fell on his hand, tracing idly through chest hair. This was everything he'd wanted.

"I think-- no, I know that was the best blow job I've ever had," Aaron breathed, and it occured to him he might be babbling while his mind was still a little hazy, but he didn't care.

"Mmm. Thank you." Dave couldn't wipe the grin off his face. He shifted a little closer, looping one leg over Aaron's.

Aaron glanced at Dave, slightly surprised. They'd woken up pressed together comfortably that one morning in Dave's bed, and it had been nice, but this was different. This was real, and happening _very_ fast, Aaron realized. He licked his lips and looped his arm around Dave, pulling him closer anyway and hoping he wasn't going to fuck up this friendship suddenly. "My only complaint is that it didn't last long enough," he teased, his voice hoarse.

"Huh. Maybe next time you'll have more stamina," Dave jibed back. He closed his eyes, feeling utterly content.

Aaron breathed a laugh, letting the playful banter distract him but not really having a reply. He drew a deep, sated breath, and kissed Dave's forehead. He let the silence hang for a few moments, thinking back on the whirlwind events of the last few hours, and then finally whispered, "Thank you."

Dave made a quiet noise. "Completely my pleasure," he said. He took a slow breath, then stifled a yawn. "But if you want to show your thanks in a more tangible way, you could get a washcloth and turn out the lights."

Aaron snorted. "I hope you're not always this demanding after sex," he murmured, realizing that was the second time he'd said in not so many words that he wanted this again. _Don't think about that_. He tilted Dave's chin up to kiss him, humming softly at the taste of his release on Dave's tongue, then slipped out of the bed to get the washcloth.

"Not always," Dave said, amused. He sprawled on his back, watching Hotch walking naked to the bathroom. "God, you're gorgeous," he murmured before he caught himself.

Aaron glanced over at Dave briefly, not having expected those words, though he really should have, given the compliments Dave had been giving all night. Aaron just shook his head, though, and walked into the bathroom. When he came out with a damp washcloth, he threw it gently at Dave's face and went to hit the light switch and check the door lock.

Sputtering, Dave pulled the washcloth off his face and scowled at it. "I hope this hasn't touched your ass," he muttered, and used it to clean himself up before tossing it in Aaron's general direction. Of course, by that time the lights were out, so he had no idea if he actually hit the mark.

Aaron hid a laugh in the darkness, and then heard the washcloth thud softly against the floor... and he wasn't using _anything_ that had possibly picked up anything off the carpet in this motel when he couldn't see it. He didn't even bother looking for the washcloth and just went back to the bathroom to clean himself up. When he returned, he slid onto the bed next to Dave and fumbled for his jaw in the dark to kiss him.

"Mmm." Dave wrapped his arms around Aaron and pulled him close as they kissed, glad he'd come back to share the bed.

Somehow in the dark it was easier not to worry about this. Aaron had been tempted to ask if this would change things, but then decided that was ridiculous because there was no way it _wouldn't_ change things. Still in the darkness, in the comfort of Dave's arms, Aaron thought it would be just fine to see what happened as it happened for once. He settled against Dave, looking forward to sleeping in someone else's arms for the first time in far too long.


	4. Chapter 4

Dave woke up happy. It was one thing to wake up in a good mood, but this was different. This was waking up warm and secure and with someone's--Aaron's--arms tight around him. This was a quiet content that was better, more permanent, than a good mood.

Eyes still closed, he smiled and shifted closer to Aaron. He knew they would have to get up soon and get started on the case. But for now he could listen to Aaron's breathing and revel in the fact that he would have this again. Aaron would be _his_. He'd grown so accustomed to knowing Aaron _wasn't_ his and would never be that he hadn't realized how much that knowledge hurt, until the hurt was healed.

"Mmm," Aaron groaned, then turned his head to kiss Dave's forehead, the closest thing of Dave's he could reach. He pulled Dave closer. It was strange, the broad shoulders in his arms. He'd felt this before, but he hadn't been able to fully enjoy it last time--not that there wasn't a part of him that felt an undeniable sadness for the relationship he'd lost that had been such a huge part of his life for so long... but it was too early and he was too sated from sleep and last night's activities to think much on that now. 

"Morning," Dave murmured, his voice hoarse from sleep. He lifted his face to kiss Aaron slowly. "Sleep all right?" He smiled at Aaron, feeling totally unguarded for once, and not minding at all. He lifted a hand to brush his thumb across Aaron's cheek.

Aaron met Dave's gaze and couldn't help but smile at the expression on Dave's face. In truth, once Dave had fallen asleep, Aaron had stayed awake for quite a while, unmoving, trying to sort the events that had so completely changed his life in just the few hours before. Eventually Dave's breathing soothed him to sleep, though, even if it had only been a few hours before now. "Yeah, I did," he murmured, and kissed Dave again.

"Good," Dave mumbled between kisses. He rolled so he was on top of Aaron, his kisses growing hungrier. "We have a big day ahead of us." His lips brushed Aaron's as he spoke. He wasn't ready to leave the bed and acknowledge the world outside yet.

Aaron's smile widened and he wrapped a leg around Dave's. "We should go," he whispered. Except he really didn't want to. That was clear enough in his kiss.

"Mmhmm," Dave agreed, and kissed him again. He ran a hand down Aaron's arm. "It's still early." Another kiss. "Come shower with me." Actual sex in the shower was awkward and dangerous, but there was plenty of touching and kissing for them to catch up on, and he frankly didn't want to tear himself away from Aaron just yet.

Aaron laughed softly, the sound lazily rolling out. "Someone's always got the cold spot."

"Yeah, whoever's slowest," Dave said, arching an eyebrow in challenge.

Aaron shifted under Dave's weight. "You have an unfair advantage."

Dave lowered his head and kissed Aaron slowly, then pulled back, smiling. "It's about time you chased me for a change," he said, and tried to roll away.

"Mmm, chasing me?" Aaron looped his arm around Dave's waist, keeping him where he was. "Wait, what happened to behaving yourself?" _I happened_ , he thought suddenly. _I started that_. He pushed aside the flood of guilt, reminding himself that Haley was the one that effectively ended the relationship.

"I tried that," Dave said, pleased. "It stopped working about the time you ordered me to shut up and fuck you." He kissed Aaron again.

That startled a laugh out of Aaron, and he pulled Dave in for another kiss... and then _shoved_ him off in the opposite direction of the bathroom and started for the shower.

Startled, Dave sprawled over on the bed and had to scramble not to actually fall off it. "Hey!" he cried as he watched Hotch steal a head start for the shower. "Cheater!" He was grinning as he followed.

*****

Dave had never had a relationship work quite like this before. For one thing, he'd never actually had more than casual involvement with another man, and for another, he'd never dated an agent he worked so closely with. He wasn't sure, going into it, if it would be easier or harder this way...but it turned out to be easy. Almost frighteningly easy, for his part. For Aaron...he wasn't sure.

Aaron had just come out of a relationship that had already lasted years, despite that it wasn't a marriage on paper. Dave had been through it once already. Besides, if Dave were honest with himself, he'd been in love with Aaron for months. So he didn't push Aaron on the emotional side of things, and directed his attention to giving Aaron as much physical pleasure as they had time for.

The case in Athens was a bad one, but it was at least quick. They spent a week and a half there and drove back to Quantico more slowly than they'd driven down. Dave let Aaron drive this time, stopping at some of his favorite places along the way, and didn't ask questions about how many times he'd been to them with Haley.

When they walked into the BAU, Gideon could probably tell something had changed, but he didn't ask Dave, and Dave wasn't about to volunteer. He could appreciate that Jason wanted his team to work well together, but there was no way in hell Dave wanted to be profiled himself. Aaron, of course, admired Gideon and, more to the point, _liked_ him more than Dave did.

It wasn't a surprise, then, that Jason called to them late in the afternoon when they were getting ready to leave. "Hotch, could I have a minute before you go?"

Aaron glanced up from his desk, and ignored the way his stomach dropped out. He somehow had a feeling he knew what was coming. Sort of. And he really wasn't sure yet how to handle it. Jason Gideon was one of the best profilers there were, so he didn't think denying his relationship with Dave was such a good idea. "Sure," he said casually, and stood to make his way to the office, his mind going over what to say if Gideon told him to end the relationship.

Aaron liked Dave. He liked waking up with someone next to him. There was no _doubt_ that Dave knew how make Aaron's body feel more than Haley ever had, and he liked the constancy of having someone who cared about him. He liked the routine of relationships. Aaron was used to that, and Dave had filled that void in his life, even when Aaron still felt utterly torn about the circumstances that had led to his relationship with Dave moving beyond friendship and into... whatever it was now.

He stepped in Gideon's office and didn't close the door, knowing Gideon would see that as an automatic silent admission of "guilt", then walked to his usual half-way point between the desk and door. He lifted his eyebrows to indicate he was waiting for Gideon to start.

"You did good work on this case," Gideon said, glancing past Aaron to the door, then back. "You and Rossi make a good team."

Aaron nodded. "Thank you. I think so," he said, not thinking for a moment that was all there was to this, especially not after where Gideon's eyes had darted.

Gideon smiled. "Did you have a chance to see Haley while you were in Georgia?"

Aaron drew a deep breath, hesitating for a moment, then gave Gideon a somewhat neutral answer, "No, I didn't."

"Really? That's too bad. But she'll probably be coming up to Virginia soon, won't she? The school year is nearly over." Gideon didn't look away from Aaron's face.

Aaron stood there for a moment, trying to ignore the way he felt like he couldn't breathe, like something was tightening around his chest. He didn't look away either, though. After a long moment, though, he looked away out the window. "It appears she's not moving, after all, sir," he said, emphasizing the last word in a way that implied-- _just barely_ \--that this wasn't a topic he really wanted to discuss, which was only further emphasized by looking back at Gideon as soon as he said it.

"Really." Gideon's voice was quiet, inviting confidence. "That's a shame." He glanced beyond Aaron again, then down at his desk.

When Gideon looked away again, so did Aaron. He let his eyes travel Gideon's office walls and then the vertical blinds in the windows that faced the bullpen, but he kept silent.

Gideon sighed. "Are you happy here, Aaron?"

Aaron glanced back, and for some reason that question got under his skin more than Aaron had expected it should. He stared at Gideon for a moment, telling himself just to say 'yes' and be done with this. Instead, he moved back to the door and shut it, then walked right up to Gideon's desk and sat down, not looking away from Gideon's face. "I just had a thirteen year relationship with the only person I've ever loved end, so I think I have every right to be a little upset." He paused a moment, wondering if Gideon would stop him, but then continued when Gideon didn't say anything. "If you're asking whether I have any intention of leaving the BAU, however, I can tell you emphatically that the answer is no."

Gideon kept watching him, his expression giving away nothing. "I'm glad to hear that you aren't thinking of leaving," he said quietly. "You have an amazing amount of potential--potential you're already proving. This team is made up of some of the finest minds in the world, and I have no doubt that you belong here. I'm glad that you have no doubt of that, either." He folded his hands on the table and sighed. After a moment, he continued. "I also have no doubt that David belongs here. He has been doing this work for years, and he is one of the finest profilers I have ever worked with. He is also, of course, arrogant, bold to the point of brashness, and rather bad at relating to the press." He paused, obviously to give Aaron a chance to say something.

Aaron's expression was neutral, and for a moment he sat there, just watching Gideon, prepared not to say anything. Then he dropped his gaze, shook his head once, and glance back up. "I don't disagree."

"Your partnership is remarkable. You've achieved an extraordinary level of rapport and trust. I think you bring out the finer aspects of his personality. And I think he also brings out a great deal in you." Gideon tilted his head. "I hope you won't hurt him, Hotch." His voice was soft, his eyes on Aaron's, half in caution and half in appeal.

_God_. That was the last thing Aaron had expected to hear, and it sent a flash of cold through him. He looked down and stared at the edge of Gideon's desk and then froze momentarily. _Fuck_. All the guilt and fear he'd felt that first night in Athens about turning to Dave when he'd been upset returned so quickly it was nearly paralyzing. "He's... not unaware of my situation, Jason."

Gideon watched Aaron silently for what felt like a long time. "Just be careful, Hotch." He finally offered a small smile, but it looked sad. "This job can be hard on people, and it's hell on our relationships. I don't want to see either of you hurt."

Aaron sat there, not looking up for a moment, but then he finally managed to nod and glance up. "I really have no intention of hurting anyone."

"I know." Gideon's voice was quiet. "We rarely do." He looked at Aaron for another moment, then nodded at the door. Dave was leaning against the wall outside, arms folded, obviously waiting on Aaron.

Aaron felt a little like he was being scolded and dismissed, but Gideon had this way of saying things that made it nearly impossible to argue, which was part of the reason he was so damn good at his job. Not that Aaron really wanted to argue, but that was beside the point. After a moment, he nodded again and got up to leave.

When he got outside, he glanced at Dave and gave him a small nod before walking to their desk.

"I'm heading out," Dave told Aaron, though he didn't look away from Gideon yet. Their gazes held for a moment, and for some reason the defensive rebelliousness Dave was feeling faded. He glanced at Aaron. "You coming? We can get some dinner."

Aaron didn't look back. He just gathered his things at his desk. "Yeah, sure. I skipped lunch."

Dave nodded and ignored Gideon as he walked out. He was feeling a little sick as he stood by the elevator and waited for Aaron to catch up. Gideon had always ignored his flirtations and dalliances after Kay left...but of course this was more than that. He wondered what Gideon had said. And what Aaron had said back.

Aaron caught up to Dave and headed into the elevator once it opened. When it closed, he glanced at Dave, unsure whether to try to pretend everything was okay or not. It wasn't. Aaron felt like he ought to just call off the entire thing now. But he knew he wouldn't. He couldn't. He was enjoying his relationship with Dave as it was, even if he wasn't as invested as Dave was, if Gideon's warning held the truth. He knew over time that would change, though, even if he wasn't ready to let go of his reservations yet. He knew he cared a lot about Dave. That thought managed to put a smile on Aaron's face. "Hello," he murmured, his smile quirking slightly to the side.

"Closed-door conference with Gideon, huh?" Dave said, shoving his hands in his pockets. He knew Aaron could see right through his nonchalant tone, but he couldn't quite bring himself to ask outright what they'd talked about.

Aaron didn't look away, but he somehow doubted, regardless of Dave asking, that Dave would react very well to Aaron honestly telling Dave what had been discussed. Best case scenario, Dave would dismiss the idea of Aaron hurting him as ridiculous. _I hope I don't hurt you_ , Aaron thought. "Yeah. Not really that bad, actually."

Dave raised his eyebrows, but he smiled. "You're not gonna tell me, are you?" The elevator dinged open and he headed for the parking lot, knowing Aaron would keep up with him.

"No. I'm not," Aaron said, his smile widening as he followed Dave out.

Laughing, Dave shook his head. "Fine. You can buy me dinner to make up for it."

"I didn't realize a little privacy was such a grave offense," Aaron said, grinning. He caught up of Dave and matched his stride. "But I'll buy dinner anyway, on the contingency that we share a bottle of wine at my house tonight."

Dave glanced over at him, liking the expression on Aaron's face. He pretended to think it over, then tilted his head. "Deal. White or red? I can pick some up on my way."

"I don't care. Surprise me," Aaron said, glancing behind them to see if anyone was there, and then giving Dave's upper arm a squeeze before turning towards his car.

Dave spent longer than he meant to trying to pick out a wine. Something quality, because Aaron Hotchner was a man used to quality. Something not too romantic or feminine, since they were both men. He wanted something robust and passionate. And even though he'd learned a lot about wine while he was with Kay, he wasn't sure he'd managed to find what he wanted when he left the store. All the same, he ended up at Aaron's with a bottle of white that he thought would work.

He told himself it was ridiculous to be nervous. They'd been partners for almost a year now, and they'd been sleeping together for a week and a half. But this was different. This was at home. This meant something.

He hoped. Oh, God, if this was going to blow up in his face, was it even worth it? Dave was still standing on the doorstep, unable even to ring the bell, when Aaron opened the door.

Aaron had decided to actually cook... which was something he hadn't really done in quite some time, though he didn't think he was too bad at it. He supposed it technically counted as "buying" dinner, and it was more personal. After his meeting with Gideon, Aaron felt like _more personal_ was something he needed to aim for. He wasn't a man who'd ever taken sex casually, which was why he'd only ever been with Haley before now and why he hadn't been able to allow himself to do anything more than guiltily kiss Dave before. Aaron might not know how exactly he felt, but he'd decided on the drive home that he wasn't going to take sex _casually_ with Dave either. So, yes. He'd decided he needed to give more.

He was just putting the chicken in the oven when he saw Dave's headlights, and he waited for a minute before he frowned, wondering why there hadn't been a knock, and headed to the door. Dave was standing on his doorstep, and Aaron smiled at him. "I saw your truck." He glanced at the driveway. "You all right?"

Dave took a deep breath and smiled. "Yeah. Sorry, I was just thinking." He glanced around. "Good to be home, isn't it?" He stepped inside and held out the bottle. "I hope this goes with dinner."

Aaron took it from him and read the label, then waited for the door to shut behind Dave. He leaned in to kiss him briefly, then headed for the kitchen. "It'll be fine, as long as I don't burn dinner," he said.

"You're cooking?" Dave's smile widened and he followed Aaron into the kitchen, intrigued. "Please tell me you have a flaw hiding somewhere, besides the fact that you hog the covers and don't laugh enough."

Aaron turned around and leaned against the counter a moment. "I laugh plenty." Of course, that was true in private matters. Mostly true. Aaron was well aware he had a tendency to be overly serious in other ways. "Anyway, you haven't tasted it yet." He turned to find a corkscrew.

Dave laughed and stepped up behind him to slide an arm around his stomach and pull him back against Dave's chest. It was strange, being in Aaron's home. He hoped he wasn't overstepping himself. "You laugh almost as rarely as Gideon," he murmured, and kissed Aaron's neck. "I always figure it's the highlight of my day if I can make you laugh." He was exaggerating a little, and honestly he wouldn't change that about Aaron even if he could. It made every laugh more valuable.

Aaron closed his eyes, fighting the momentary impulse to tense. It was strange; this was the house he'd meant to share with Haley. _She's gone. She never even lived here. Not really. The things she left are still in boxes._ He leaned back a bit into the embrace. "You make me laugh more than anyone," he replied, then turned in Dave's arms. "I'll never get the wine open and our dinner will be charcoal if you keep this up."

"I'll open the wine. You take care of dinner." Dave kissed Aaron, a slow, thorough kiss, then plucked the corkscrew out of his hand and gave him a nudge towards the oven. He opened the wine and opened cupboards until he found glasses.

"Mmm, Aaron hummed, just leaning against the counter for a moment when Dave moved, and then going to work on their food. Dave's poured him a glass of wine, and they talked for a while while Aaron cooked, in spite of Aaron having told Dave to go make himself comfortable.

The food was... mediocre. At least, it wasn't half as good as Aaron had hoped it would be. When he finished, he leaned back in his seat and took a long sip of his wine. "Flaw number one. You should start cataloging them. You'll have a laundry list before you even know it."

Dave grinned and took his notebook out of his shirt pocket. "Aaron's flaw, number one," he said aloud as he wrote. "Perfectionist." He glanced up teasingly at him.

Aaron rolled his eyes and feigned annoyance.

Dave kicked him gently under the table. "The chicken was good. You're just too hard on yourself. Not to mention the company made the food even better." He took a sip of his wine and relaxed back in his seat. "The wine helped, too," he said after a minute.

Aaron was about to say that the company had helped quite a bit, but his lips quirked to the side when Dave finished, and he trapped Dave's foot between his. "How many glasses have you _had_?"

"Hey, you've been here the whole time. I've only had one. And a half." Dave's gaze was warm. "I guess the company helped more than the wine."

"Oh, thank you," Aaron said, his tone amused. He held Dave's gaze for a moment. Gideon's works kept surfacing in Aaron's mind whenever the conversation broke and Dave looked at him like that. "I'll clean up while you decide how we should spend the rest of the night," he said finally, giving Dave a _mildly_ suggestive look as he slipped out of his seat.

Dave raised his eyebrows, intrigued by that idea. "You know, I do know how to wash a plate."

"Well, I do have a dishwasher, and I know how to use it even without--" _Haley's instructions_. He stopped abruptly. "There's just two of us. Not much to clean up. I can do it."

Dave nodded and refilled both their wine glasses while Aaron cleaned up. He headed to the living room and sat on the couch, wondering again if this was going to work. He thought it was. Of course he had to keep reminding himself that Aaron was still mourning one relationship. Dave had to give as much time and space as Aaron needed. But they were good for each other, good companions, good partners. He smiled when Aaron came into the room, taking in the rolled up sleeves and relaxed expression.

Aaron was thankful Dave had given him space for a moment, and when he walked out into the living room, he was calm again. He settled next to Dave and leaned in for a lingering kiss. "Have you decided?"

"Mmm, some more of that might be a good start," Dave said, sliding an arm around Aaron's waist and pulling him close.

Aaron pulled Dave's wine glass out of his hand and put it on the coffee table near where Dave had put Aaron's glass, then shifted to face Dave a little more. "I can do more of this," he murmured, and kissed Dave again, his fingertips stroking Dave's jaw.

Dave let his eyes close for a moment, then leaned in for another kiss. "Gideon knows, doesn't he?" he whispered after another kiss.

Aaron froze for a second, then shifted back just barely enough to look at Dave, though their noses were still brushing. After a moment, he just nodded.

Dave lifted a hand to brush through Aaron's hair. "He's not going to stop us?" He kissed Aaron again. He didn't give a damn what Gideon wanted; it was what Aaron wanted that concerned him. If Aaron thought it would cause trouble at work...

Aaron slid his hand over Dave's stomach and shook his head, wishing he knew what to say.

"What did he say?" Dave asked, hoping Aaron wouldn't avoid the subject again. "Is it a problem?"

Aaron sighed and pulled back more, holding Dave's gaze. God, he couldn't tell Dave that Gideon thought Aaron would hurt him. And Aaron had meant it when he said he had no intention of hurting Dave. Even if he was protecting himself now, he could see this relationship lasting if he dared to let himself think about it. He swallowed. "He said he could see both the advantages and disadvantages of it."

Dave snorted. "Right." He kissed Aaron again. "If you don't want to tell me, you can just say so," he murmured, and tugged, trying to get Aaron in his lap. They'd probably talked too much tonight, anyway.

Aaron shifted so he was straddling Dave, but just looked down at him, arching a brow. "You think I'm lying to you?" he asked. He hadn't lied. Those may not have been Gideon's _exact_ words, but that was the gist of it.

"I think you're avoiding the real answer," Dave said frankly. "But if you don't want to tell me, it's fine. I can respect that." He kissed Aaron again.

Aaron sat back and gave Dave a look when the kiss ended. "That is the real answer."

Dave just looked back at him for a long moment, then nodded. "Okay." He stroked his hands up Aaron's back, running his fingers into dark hair that was getting just a little long. He liked it that way, and he definitely liked messing it up, taking away a little of Aaron's control. He lifted his face for another kiss.

"Mmm," Aaron hummed, leaning in and kissing Dave fully. This was still strange, the idea that he was sitting in another man's lap, but it was becoming more and more comfortable each time they did it. He slid his arms around Dave's shoulders, brushing one hand down the back of Dave's shirt.

Dave smiled and started unbuttoning Aaron's shirt. "Thanks for dinner," he murmured, since he couldn't say what he was really thinking-- _Thanks for not letting Gideon scare you off_.

"Thanks for the wine," Aaron murmured back. He drew his hand over the planes of Dave's shoulder blades, and then realized he was probably choking Dave by pulling his shirt back to do it. He breathed a small laugh and opened the first few buttons of Dave's shirt.

Dave finished with Aaron's shirt and slid his hands inside, trailing them over his skin. He looked up at Aaron's face.

Aaron splayed his fingers over the top of Dave's chest, watching the way Dave was looking at him. He drew his hand up Dave's neck, brushing his knuckles over Dave's jaw and leaned in again to give Dave a slow, lingering kiss, then pulled away. "What?"

"Nothing." Dave shook his head slightly. "You're very handsome. I like looking at you." It felt suddenly like he was giving away too much, like this was something he shouldn't say.

Aaron smiled and kissed Dave again. "You're not so bad yourself," he teased, letting his hand drift further back along Dave's jaw until his fingers were in Dave's hair.

Dave snorted but didn't protest. He just slid his arms around Aaron and pulled him close for another, slower, kiss.

Aaron hummed a pleased noise and settled against Dave, liking the way Dave's hands felt against his skin. "Was this really your plan for the rest of the night?" he whispered and kissed Dave again. "Not that I mind..."

"Mmm, maybe for a little while," Dave murmured. He liked exploring Aaron's body like this, which they hadn't had a lot of time for yet. "Maybe in a while we'll go to bed." He stroked his palms over Aaron's back, taking in the play of muscles under his skin, as they kissed.

"Mmm," Aaron hummed, deepening the kiss. He slid his hand back down to Dave's buttons and started to work them open the rest of the way down. "So those women in IAFIS were right; you really are only interested in one thing," he said, keeping as straight a face as possible and flicking a finger across one of Dave's nipples.

"Hey--ahh!" Dave gasped as the sensation distracted him from protesting, which Aaron had obviously intended. He grunted and pulled Aaron in for another kiss. "Been gossiping about me, Hotshot?" he whispered. "Not kosher, gossiping about your partner." He bit Aaron's lower lip gently.

"I wabn't--" Aaron pulled away from Dave's teeth. "I wasn't. I didn't have to say a word," he said, his resolve not to smile crumbling. He kissed Dave again with more hunger and turned his hand to pinch Dave, gently rolling Dave's nipple between his fingertips.

Dave laughed. "Bastard," he muttered, and kissed Aaron again. God, he was in over his head. It was too much. And he couldn't stop. "Fine, if you're not interested in sex, _you_ decide what we're doing," he teased.

"The news is on in ten minutes... or so," Aaron suggested, trailing kisses over Dave's jaw.

Dave groaned. "Too much like work," he said, arching his neck so Aaron could continue. "Movie, not the news."

"I like work, and I like the news." Aaron didn't stop his lips, and sucked Dave's earlobe into his mouth. "Isn't dinner and a movie a little cliche?" he breathed in Dave's ear.

"Isn't fa--sleeping with your partner a little cliche?" Dave countered, and the thrill that ran down his spine had nothing to do with what Aaron was doing. God, had he really come that close to such a stupid slip? He knew he was ahead of Aaron in this, but he didn't have to blurt out that he was falling in love. He slid his hands down to cup Aaron's ass, praying that would distract him. "I don't watch the news. I'll hear enough about the atrocities in the world when my pager goes off."

Aaron sucked in a breath and told himself not to react, but his lips slowed on Dave's skin anyway. It struck Aaron suddenly that maybe Gideon had been wrong. Aaron tried to ignore it, but it didn't work. He pulled back after a moment and smiled. "Not all news is bad," he said, then slid off Dave's lap. "Movie then," he said decisively. "And, yes, it is cliche sleeping with your partner." 

Shit, Aaron had caught him. Dave forced a smile and kissed Aaron again. "Well, one more cliche won't matter, then," he reasoned, and leaned back on the couch, stretching his legs out. "You pick."

Aaron nodded and went to look for a movie. A few minutes later, Aaron was slouched down on the couch too close to Dave so that their arms were brushing. Dave was complaining that Aaron had picked a far too serious movie, but he didn't seem to really mind in spite of his words. Aaron slid his hand over Dave's knee.

Dave was complaining just for the sake of it, still feeling the chill of his mistake earlier. He still ended up doing an exaggerated yawn and stretch, just to make Aaron laugh when he slid an arm around his shoulders.

Aaron rolled his eyes, but settled against Dave's chest anyway and fell silent as the movie started. Dave chuckled and turned his attention to the movie, which turned out to be good. They'd finished off the bottle of wine by the time it ended. As the credits rolled, Dave found himself wondering if Aaron would ask him to stay, or if he would be going home. It wasn't about sex, whatever Aaron might think. Dave just liked _being with_ Aaron. He didn't say anything, just turned his head to kiss Aaron's neck.

Aaron closed his eyes and tilted his head to give Dave more access, wondering if he should invite Dave to bed or not. He _wanted_ Dave to stay. And he was sure Dave probably wanted that too. So what was the problem? Aaron shook himself mentally. There was no problem; he'd just let himself think Dave was farther ahead of this than Aaron was. "What was that you said about bed before?" he breathed.

"I wouldn't want you to think I'm just interested in one thing," Dave teased, his lips brushing Aaron's skin. "Maybe we should just sleep, so I can prove I'm not just after your body." He angled himself more towards Aaron, resting a hand on his stomach.

Aaron laced his fingers with Dave's. "You _are_ after my body, though, right? At least a little?" he said, his tone light.

"Hmm, just a little," Dave murmured, pressing an open-mouthed kiss against Aaron's neck. "Part of the whole package." He smiled against Aaron's skin.

"I bet you say that to all the girls," Aaron said dryly, then got up and tugged Dave with him, pulling him toward the bedroom.

Dave laughed and followed willingly, pleased that Aaron had invited him. He hoped he wasn't taking this too quickly, even as he knew he was. "I've never dated a profiler before, though," he replied, pausing in the doorway to Aaron's bedroom. This was the bed he'd shared with Haley. Dave wondered if it would be awkward.

Aaron stopped when Dave did, and it took him a moment to follow what had caused the pause, but when it hit him, a wash of cold swept through his body. He stepped back towards Dave and kissed him, sliding an arm around Dave's waist. "Or we could go to your place," he said softly.

Dave's heart sank a little, but he wrapped his arms around Aaron. "It's up to you," he replied, matching Aaron's tone. He didn't want Haley to be an issue with them, but he could understand. Though... "We've both had quite a bit of wine."

Aaron nodded, then a completely irrational side of him almost suggested they take a cab. He hadn't considered this before now, and he really should have. His stomach was twisting. "You're right," he said. He'd have to get over this eventually. This was faster than he'd ever planned, but it wasn't Dave's fault. 

Dave kissed Aaron softly. "I can go," he offered, trying not to let Aaron see how unhappy he was with that option.

"Sorry. No, it's fine," Aaron said, looking at Dave and wishing he could move from the doorway. He almost wished Dave would push him.

Dave nodded and kissed him again, more hungrily. "Then let's go to bed," he murmured, and nudged Aaron toward the bed.

Oh, good. Aaron let Dave guide him back into the room, which made it easier to actually do it, but didn't erase the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach when they settled in bed. And he hoped Dave really _didn't_ want to have sex, because Aaron suddenly didn't think he _could_ get in the mood. He wrapped his arms around Dave and pressed his face against Dave's neck.

Dave thought about sleeping alone for the first time after his divorce from Kay, and thought he knew a little bit about how Aaron felt. Of course, it had been several months after the divorce when he even thought first about dating, so he knew he didn't understand fully. Then again, he hadn't had temptation staring him in the face at the time. He stroked a hand over Aaron's hair and down his back. "I like sleeping next to you," he murmured, closing his eyes. "I've never trusted anyone like I trust you."

Aaron relaxed a little, drawing a deep breath and taking in Dave's scent. He stroked his thumb down Dave's side and kissed his neck. "I trust you too." God, this was weird. "I hope you meant it when you said you just wanted to sleep," he murmured.

"Yes," Dave said. He was fine with just sleeping. He was ridiculously grateful not to be sent home.

"Good," Aaron said, and lifted his head to kiss Dave softly.

Dave held Aaron there, drawing out the kiss. "Like I said," he murmured when they parted, "I'm not just interested in one thing." He smiled and closed his eyes.

*****

Another case finished, and this time with good results, a life saved. Dave let his arm brush Aaron's as they stood in the elevator, a subtle but real way of acknowledging their relationship. It was still early days, but he was settling in, thinking of Aaron the way he used to think about Kay, as someone who would always be part of his life, to be taken into account when making plans. It was easier than it had any right to be, and he was happy.

Which was why he felt as if he'd been punched in the chest when the elevator doors slid open and the first thing he saw was Haley.

She looked up at the chime and her entire face lit up when she saw Aaron. It made Dave's stomach jump unpleasantly.

"Aaron! Agent Gideon said he was expecting you back soon. He said I could wait." She glanced at Dave, but didn't say anything before looking back at Aaron.

Aaron hadn't really been paying any attention to his surroundings. He'd been focusing on the subtle warmth Dave's touch sent through him. But when Haley's voice cut through his thoughts, his head jerked up to her and all the warmth washed away, while at the same time, he couldn't deny that there was a very real part of himself happy to see her.

Still, he frowned deeply, and nearly let the elevator doors close again when he simply started at her too long. Luckily, he remembered where he was fast... and _oh God,_ Gideon had spoken to her! Aaron darted a glance at Dave and then stepped out of the elevator. He had half a mind to grab her arm and drag her into a private corner of the hall, but he just walked up close enough that he could breathe, "What are you doing here?"

Haley's smile didn't fade much, but it was noticeable. She stepped forward and slid her arms around him, pressing her face to his chest. "Oh, Aaron, I made a terrible mistake. I came to tell you that."

Aaron hadn't meant to get close to her for this reason. He'd actually intended to stand "over" her a bit, but this... Aaron stood there frozen for a minute, then awkwardly lifted his hands and returned the hug stiffly. Because it _was_ Haley. And he couldn't be so cold as to just stand there, no matter how much he was tempted, especially with Dave there. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to figure out what to say, but he couldn't find the breath to speak, and just opened his eyes to stare down at the top of her head. "Haley..."

Dave told himself to go into the BAU and pretend nothing was wrong. He told himself not to hyperventilate. He was taking neither piece of advice. Finally he closed his eyes, but he didn't move.

"I'm so sorry, Aaron. I've been wrong. I've been so wrong. And I've missed you. I thought I could do it without you, but...life is so miserable with you gone. I can't do this." Haley clung to him, her arms tight, her fingers clutching the back of his suit jacket.

Aaron didn't look at Dave. He couldn't, and after a moment he leaned back and gripped Haley's arms, trying to get her to let go without pushing her, trying not to look to see if Gideon, or anyone else in the bullpen, was watching. "'I'm sorry' doesn't put things back the way they were. You shouldn't have come here," he said under his breath

She stood back, staring up at him in surprise. "Aaron..." Her eyes were pleading. "I had to see you right away. I tried the house, but you were gone. You...you packed up my things." Her lower lip trembled.

Dave opened his eyes, wondering if there were anything of his at Aaron's house, anything that might tell her they had been sharing a relationship closer than that of work partners. He wondered if Haley knew he was in love with her ex-fiance.

Aaron stared at Haley a moment--and _fuck_ , he wished she'd stop looking at him like that. He watched her lip, and then his voice softened in spite of his attempt not to let it; the last thing he needed was for her to _cry_. "You were gone. You left. I was going to ship them back." He hadn't been able to, but he wished he had now.

"I want to come back," she said, her voice quietly urgent. "I promise I'll give it a real try, Aaron. I love you. I want to be with you. Whatever's important to you is fine. Please." Her voice trembled.

Dave closed his eyes for a moment, then drew in a deep breath and opened them again. "You should talk to your fiancee, Aaron," he said, his voice gruff. "Take her out to lunch." He pushed past them, not letting himself touch Aaron at all. "I'll handle the paperwork." He glanced over his shoulder, hoping he didn't look as wrecked as he suddenly felt. "It's nice to see you again, Haley." Then he went inside the BAU office.

Aaron felt his heart sink. _She's not my fiancee, and you know it_ , he thought angrily, but only watched Dave go. "Haley, you need to go," he said quietly.

"Why?" she demanded, staring at him. "Agent Gideon didn't have a problem with my being here. And your partner said you could take me to lunch." She touched his arm. "Aaron, we need to _talk_."

"I know we do," Aaron said. He still didn't want to leave. "This isn't--" He expelled a breath, not knowing what to do or say anymore. He didn't have any excuses not to leave. Dave had made sure of that.

"Aaron, I love you. Please, I know I've been awful." She looked down. "I tried to do what your mother suggested. She thought we could get you to come back. But I see now that _this_ is what's important to you. And...and I shouldn't have made you choose. I was wrong."

"My mother?!" he asked, raising his voice just slightly from the hushed tone he'd been using. It didn't surprise him, really. He was convinced, at times, that Haley got along better with his mother than even Aaron did. He stared at her for another moment, then took her upper arm and pulled her gently towards the elevator.

"I just thought--Aaron, she could see I was unhappy about things. And she thought you'd change your mind. She thought you would see..." Haley shook her head. "She was wrong. And I was wrong. I'm sorry."

Aaron shook his head slowly. "This isn't the place to discuss this," he said, waiting until the elevator doors opened and pulling her inside.

Haley reached up and covered his hand with hers, pulling it down from her arm and wrapping both hands around it. "I'm sorry."

He looked down at her, thankful the elevator was empty. "I already told you, 'I'm sorry' doesn't make everything right." It didn't negate the fact that he'd been sleeping with Dave _or_ that she had purposely manipulated him.

"I know. But we've been together for so long, Aaron. Can't you at least listen to me?"

"I'm listening," he said, knowing everything she said was just going to make this more and more complicated. It didn't matter what he did now, he was damned either way.

"I'll do anything I have to do, Aaron. Anything. I just want to prove that I'm committed to making it work. I really am. I know I shouldn't have tried to manipulate you. I shouldn't have even talked to your mother about our problems. I know you aren't that close to her, and I went behind your back." She looked down, her hands tightening on his. "Your work here frightens me. I don't want you to be like David Rossi, who never sits with his back to the door and always watches people like he doesn't trust them. I don't want you to be in danger. But I've realized this is important to you. You want to protect people instead of just getting justice for them when they're already dead."

Aaron watched her, his resolve crumbling by the minute. After a moment, he sighed and pulled her against him. God, what the hell was he doing? He didn't let her hand go, but wrapped his other arm around her. "Dave was in Waco last year, what do you expect? He's a brilliant profiler." _All you can say is in defense of Dave?_ "I don't know," he finally said, sounding defeated. He settled his chin against the top of her head. God, this felt good. And familiar. And wrong at the same time now. "I don't know if this can work again." 

Haley wrapped her arms tightly around him. "It can, Aaron. I'll earn your trust back. I'll stay. I've talked to the people at the school. They have a summer school session I can teach. I could move back next week. Please."

He shook his head. "I... I have to think about it." She probably thought he was just punishing her now. There was no way she could possibly understand what a mess she'd just made by walking into the BAU today.

She stared up at him, her eyes glassy with tears. "I don't understand. What is there to think about? Aaron, we're in love. We've been together since high school." Her breath was coming faster, a prelude to actual crying. "Please, I don't know who I am without you. I need you. I thought you needed me."

"Haley..." he started. His chest was aching. It felt like it was constricting. "You're right. You don't understand." He glanced up at the numbers lighting up inside the elevators, mentally trying to gauge how much time they had before the doors opened on them again. "Please don't cry."

"I can't help it," she whispered, turning her face so it pressed against his jacket. "I've ruined everything and I just want to fix it. I want to make it all right and you won't--you can't--" Her words dissolved into sobs.

Aaron sighed, not sure if he was more frustrated at her or if he just felt bad for the way this was all turning out. It wasn't her fault he'd had sex with Dave the very night Haley had ended things. She would never do the same thing to him. He pulled her close again and stroked a hand over her hair. "Shh," he whispered.

"I--love you--so much," she managed, holding on to him.

"I know," was all Aaron could manage at first, but he couldn't not return it after a moment's hesitation. He _did_ love her. Even if that hurt more than he could imagine right now, and he still didn't know what he was going to do. "I love you too."

*****

Haley hadn't had a hotel room. Aaron had slept on the couch. She complained, and pouted, and even cried a bit more, but Aaron couldn't sleep with her. Not in that bed. He'd been with Dave in that bed for the past week, and had finally started to become more comfortable with that. And now? Haley was sleeping in the bed, Aaron was decidedly _not_ sleeping on the couch. And Dave wasn't answering his phone.

The following morning Aaron gave Haley a kiss on the forehead, in spite of how she frowned at that, and left for the BAU. He still had to work, and he intended to get Dave alone at some point during the day to talk to him. They needed to talk about this, and Aaron wasn't making any decisions until they did.

Except that when he got to his desk, the one he'd been sharing with Dave for over a year, he found it half-empty. He stood there and stared at it for a moment. Dave was gone? Dave was _gone_. Aaron couldn't breathe, but he forced himself to do the one thing he could even think to do. He walked straight to Gideon's office and knocked.

Gideon looked up from the papers he'd been reading, and his expression immediately went sympathetic for a moment before he blanked it out. "Come in, Hotch." He sighed. "You might close the door."

Aaron had every intention of shutting the door, and was already doing it before Gideon was finished. Once it was shut, he just stood in the doorway for a moment, staring at Gideon. This had been a stupid idea. Dave was _**gone**_.

"David resigned yesterday afternoon," Gideon said quietly. He didn't look away from Aaron as he held out the paper he had been looking at.

Aaron stared at Gideon, but didn't move from the door. After a moment he shook his head. He knew what Gideon was holding. He knew Gideon was telling the truth and he really didn't _want_ to see Dave's letter of resignation for himself. He clenched his jaw and looked away. "Jason..."

"It isn't your fault, Aaron," Gideon said softly. "I think he considers it a gift to you." He sighed. "He took Ruby Ridge hard, Waco even harder. I'd been expecting this for some time before you showed up. He was impressed with you. Impressed that you came in like you did, without resting on your reputation. You gave him a year he might not otherwise have had."

"That really isn't any consolation right now," Aaron said through clenched teeth, finding his voice finally and fighting to keep control of himself. He still wasn't looking at Gideon.

"I expect he's at home." Gideon looked down again, as if he didn't wish to witness Aaron's pain. "You should talk to him, Aaron."

Aaron nodded after a pause, then tried to force himself to say something, or at least look at Gideon, but he just left the office without a word and headed straight back out of the bullpen, ignoring the strange looks he got. They all knew he and Dave were close--though they didn't know _how_ close. They would figure out why Aaron was leaving soon enough.

Aaron broke the speed limit on the way to Dave's, and it didn't feel like much time had passed before he was pounding on Dave's door, wondering what the hell he was supposed to say.

Dave had been packing all night. He knew it was stupid to want to go somewhere else, but he didn't think he could stay here, not so close to Quantico, not in the apartment where for too short a time he'd had what he wanted. _What you're walking away from, you dumbass_ , said a voice in his head. But he knew it was the right thing to do. He'd felt the way Aaron had reacted to Haley's presence. He'd known that Aaron would be unable to walk away from her. So it was left to Dave to make it easy. It was the only thing he could really do for Aaron now.

He wasn't surprised by the violent pounding on his door. He'd been expecting it from the moment he left the BAU yesterday. He supposed it said something that Aaron obviously hadn't been back to work after lunch yesterday, even if he had been trying to call Dave. "Yes," he muttered as he got up and headed for the door. "It says you did the right thing."

It didn't stop his heart from breaking.

He pulled the door open and tried to keep his expression blank, even though he knew his eyes gave everything away.

Aaron looked at Dave, and his anger at the other man faded considerably. He wasn't sure why, but it didn't matter, because as soon as his anger died down, the hurt he was feeling surged up to take over. He shook his head, not speaking for a moment, and then finally said, "What are you _doing_?"

Dave took a step back to let Aaron into his apartment. Shithead came running up to rub against Aaron's ankles, and for God's sake, it was ridiculous how _that_ , of all things, made Dave want to break down. He turned away and shut the door, trying to compose himself. "I'm leaving."

"You're running away," Aaron countered quickly, looking back at Dave, but not moving so he wouldn't trip over the cat. He turned and glared down at it after a moment, as if this was all the cat's fault, but the cat continued to purr and headbutt Aaron's ankles, oblivious to what was being said.

Dave took a shaky breath. "Yeah." His voice was hardly more than a whisper. He'd told himself to be ready for this, but of course he _couldn't_ be ready for this. He wanted to shout at Aaron. He wanted to kiss him and drag him into the bedroom. Instead he just stared at Shithead, feeling his eyes burning. "It's easier than waiting for you to walk away first."

That was the last answer Aaron expected to hear. He expected Dave to fight with him, deny he was running away... _something_. Not _agree_ with him. He nudged the cat away and closed the gap between himself and Dave, wanting to touch him. "You weren't even going to talk to me first?"

Dave frowned and looked up reluctantly at Aaron. "What's to talk about?" He shrugged. "Anyway, I knew you'd show up here. I wouldn't have actually left town without saying goodbye."

Aaron felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. "You're leaving _town_?"

Dave took a short breath. "What am I going to do, Aaron, stay here and watch--" He broke off and shook his head. "Look. I want you to be happy. Haley's back. She seems to understand she's got to do things differently. I'm just trying to make this easier on you."

"You just decided what was best for me without my input." Aaron frowned deeply, then reached out and gripped Dave's hand. "It doesn't have to be like this."

Dave curled his fingers around Aaron's. "How would it be?" he asked quietly. "You love Haley. And what you and I have, it's great, but it can't compete with a woman you've been with for, what, over ten years, anyway. You would end up having to make a decision. I'm just saving you from doing that."

"Dave..." Aaron stared at Dave, trying to reason the situation out in his head, and coming up no less torn than he had been last night. "Dave, I--" He lifted a hand to cup Dave's jaw and make Dave meet his eyes. "Don't leave."

"Don't leave what?" Dave said, his lips curling a little in spite of himself. "Don't leave D.C., don't leave the BAU, or don't leave you?" God, he shouldn't relish Aaron's touch, not when Haley was back. But he couldn't help it.

"All of the above," Aaron said.

Dave sighed. "So you want me to stick around and wait for you to leave me?"

"I don't want you to leave the BAU because of me. I don't want you to leave D.C. because of me." He brushed his thumb over Dave's cheek and wished he could kiss him, but all he could do was think about Haley, just as last night all he could think about was Dave when Haley tried to convince him to sleep in the bed.

Dave shook his head. "Aaron...I _stayed_ at the BAU because of you. I'd already started thinking about leaving when you showed up. I've got someone interested in a book deal about how the BAU got started, so it's not like I don't have something lined up." He told himself he should pull away and make Aaron quit touching him. Instead he sighed and slid an arm around Aaron's waist, pulling him in for a tight hug. "I'm making it easier on all of us this way," he murmured.

Aaron returned the hug automatically and turned to kiss the side of Dave's head and then just buried his nose in Dave's hair. "Don't..." He sighed. "All right, fine; I don't want you to leave D.C. for purely selfish reasons." He let out a small, sad laugh. "You can write a book here."

"You'd still have to choose," Dave said quietly. He didn't let go of Aaron. _Do you understand what you're asking of me?_ "I can't stick around waiting for Haley to fuck up again. And I'm not going to be part of your cheating on her."

"I'm not asking you to wait, and I'm not asking you to be my... lover." Aaron tightened his arms. God, he was being pathetic. "No matter what happened or will happen, you're my friend." He hadn't quite meant to say that, but the word 'friend' had slipped out so easily it only struck him a few seconds too late what it meant to say it.

"You're asking me to stay and be your friend," Dave repeated in a flat voice. He didn't know if he could do that. To be here every day, facing the knowledge that the person who meant more than anything to him was just out of reach? He ought to stop clutching at Aaron like this. But Aaron was holding on to him just as tightly. "Aaron..."

"I can't... leave her," Aaron finally admitted, and he was admitting it as much to Dave as he was to himself. "I know... I know I should." He tilted his head down a little to kiss the top of Dave's ear. "Dave, if I had expected this, I would have never... I'm so sorry." He felt like he could cry, for probably the first time since he was a child.

"I know," Dave said quietly. He lifted one hand to stroke over Aaron's hair. "I know." He closed his eyes and took a slow breath. "If you need me, I'll stay," he said, feeling his throat tighten. God, he couldn't do this. But he couldn't go, not if Aaron needed him.

"I need you," Aaron whispered, his lips still close to Dave's ear, but the words made his chest ache even more. He sighed and lowered his head a little more to press his cheek to Dave's. He didn't want to say what he was thinking. He wanted to continue to be selfish; he wanted to keep Dave here, in spite of knowing it was hardly fair to ask that of Dave. He drew a long breath. "But in spite of the fact that you've just made about a half a dozen decisions for me without my input, I can't decide whether you stay or go for you."

Dave sighed. "Maybe Gideon's lost my resignation letter," he murmured. "They've waited three years for the book, they can wait a while longer. As long as I don't let Max Ryan retire ahead of me." He ignored the little dig about making decisions. He still thought he'd been right; Aaron would eventually see that. After a long moment, he loosened his arms and pulled back to look Aaron in the face. He studied his expression, then cupped his face gently and leaned in for one last kiss.

Aaron sucked in a breath, and for a moment he didn't do anything in return. _Don't do this_ , he wanted to say, but he couldn't force the words. And then he just didn't have the resolve to fight it, and leaned in to draw his tongue along Dave's lower lip, taking the invitation and kissing Dave deeply. God, he'd never be able to forget this. He had a feeling he and Dave both knew Dave wasn't going to stay, but maybe, just once, they could let themselves fool themselves, just to make this a little easier. He pulled away after a moment, when he was out of breath. "I'll see you tomorrow then," he said, but he couldn't hide the sadness in his eyes that he knew he probably wouldn't.

"Yeah," Dave breathed, lifting a hand to brush against Aaron's cheek. He didn't know if he would be able to go through with it. Watching Aaron rebuild his life with Haley might be more than he could handle. But he wouldn't leave the city. That much he thought he could do. He caught Aaron's gaze. "Marry her, Aaron," he said quietly. "Do a better job than I did. You deserve to be happy."

Aaron looked down, away from Dave. He wasn't sure he was ready to _forgive_ her yet, let alone get married. "So do you."

Dave laughed, just a quiet expulsion of breath. "Yeah, well. Wife Number Two." He stepped back and put his hands in his pockets to keep from reaching out for Aaron again.

Aaron still didn't look up. "I should probably go." He didn't want to, but he thought staying would be even more painful.

"Yeah. Well. I'll see you." Dave kept watching Aaron, wishing he didn't feel so damned powerless. But there was nothing to do, absolutely nothing that would fix this.

Aaron reached up and gripped Dave's shoulder, but didn't say anything. There was nothing _to_ say. He drew a steadying breath and nodded, then turned to leave, not sure if he was going back to work, or going home. Maybe he'd just drive for a while.

*****

Hiding a smile, Dave looked down at the desk he still shared with Aaron and shook his head. Conover had crawled under Leming's desk and tied his shoelaces to his chair; one of these days he was going to get himself in trouble with his pranks. Dave had learned to keep an eye on Conover whenever they were in the office together. Actually the bullpen was pretty full today. Aaron wasn't here, but aside from him, they only had two agents out. Weird.

He turned his attention back to the resignation letter in front of him. It was real this time, and he and Aaron had talked it over thoroughly before Dave spoke to Gideon about it at all. Dave wasn't leaving hurt and angry this time. He was just leaving because it was impossible to move forward while he was still here, in such close proximity to Aaron.

He was truly glad Aaron was happy, and he'd been pleased--almost relieved, in a way--when Haley had shown up with a diamond on her finger. Aaron had asked Dave to be his best man, which had been a request that was impossible to refuse, which of course Aaron had counted on. At the same time, Dave couldn't sit by and watch without constantly being reminded of all he'd wanted and all he'd lost.

So here he was, his last day before official retirement from the FBI--and how weird was that, retiring at his age, but he'd earned his pension, so it all worked out. He was finally going to write that book, and he had it in mind to do a little consulting on the side to supplement his income. He thought--he hoped--that Aaron was happy for him, too.

With a sigh, Dave signed the paper in front of him and folded it once, then stood, preparing to take it in to Gideon's office.

The elevator ride to the bullpen was quiet. Aaron was riding up to the office with Gideon after a long lunch, and Aaron knew Gideon had to know how Aaron felt today. It was bitter-sweet saying goodbye to Dave. Of course goodbye wasn't _goodbye_ this time. Aaron was convinced last time would have been, if he and Dave had parted hurt and confused. Aaron had been relieved--if a bit guilty--when he'd come in to find Dave back in the office the next day.

Things had changed drastically over the last few months. Aaron really believed Haley was sorry, that she wouldn't try to manipulate him again. And he did love her. Over the months he'd come to realize that he'd loved Dave too, in a way. But of course, it wouldn't have done either of them any good to say that out loud now. Dave had been right when he'd stepped away from the relationship, and they both knew it.

They both knew Dave had to go now too, now that they could part on good terms. It was hard to share a room with Dave on cases, and Aaron still felt guilty when Dave and Haley had to spend more than five minutes together, even if he had been relieved Dave had agreed to be part of his wedding.

Aaron sighed as the elevator dinged up and up, staring down at the going away cake he and Gideon had picked up, not knowing what to say, though he was smiling faintly.

"It's difficult to see him go," Gideon said quietly. "But it's a lot better than it could have been."

Aaron nodded and glanced over at Gideon. "Much," he said, his tone matching Gideon's. "Thanks, Jason."

Gideon shrugged. "I didn't do anything," he replied, though of course he had--he'd sat on Dave's resignation letter, and then ripped it up when Dave asked to come back.

Aaron expelled a breath, a hint of a laugh. "Of course not."

Gideon smiled. "I'm glad to see you smiling more, Hotch," he said. "And I know Dave is glad to see it, too."

"I think..." Aaron started, but then shook his head and dismissed the thought. Or rather he dismissed the idea of telling Gideon that he thought Dave had known the right thing for them, even if it had been the hard thing.

The elevator doors dinged open, and Aaron walked into the bullpen. Somewhere in the corner of the room, Conover started singing 'He's a Jolly Good Fellow', and it didn't take long before the rest of the room was singing too.

When Aaron put the cake down at the desk he was no longer going to be sharing with Dave, he shrugged at Dave's bemused expression, replying with a dry, "They don't write songs about cranky bastards, unfortunately."

Dave snorted, then started laughing. "That's because the real cranky bastards would've started throwing things to make you sorry lot shut up. Geez, guys, this is nice." He glanced up at Aaron. "Your idea, Hotshot?"

Aaron settled in the seat across from Dave and shrugged again, smiling softly. "I couldn't let you leave without embarrassing you a little bit."

"Thanks," Dave said, giving him a wry smile. "What'll I do without you to keep me humble?"

"You think you're getting rid of me?" Aaron asked.

"Damn, you mean I'm not?" Dave's smile widened as he looked at Aaron, but then Leming apparently tried to stand up, because he crashed over, taking his chair with him. Conover burst out laughing, and Dave shook his head and started cutting the cake.

"You've never been humble, you dumb shit," Jacobs said as he came up for a piece of cake. "We just got lucky that Hotch is actually better than you and makes you shut up from time to time."

Dave raised his eyebrows and pointedly cut a tiny piece for Jacobs.

Gideon and Conover finally got Leming free of his chair, and he hobbled over for some cake. "At least you won't have any annoying coworkers," he muttered, though he was fighting a smile.

"Are you kidding? Rossi'll just annoy himself," Jacobs pointed out, licking the icing off his fork. "He'll miss us."

"Doubtful," Dave said, rolling his eyes. He glanced over at Aaron. He would miss a lot of this, but there were things he wouldn't miss, too. He wouldn't miss averting his eyes whenever he and Aaron had to share a room at a hotel. He wouldn't miss people's commentary on how long it had been since he'd been on a date, and Conover's loud opinion that Rossi was cranky these days and really needed to get laid. But he would miss his partner, that was for damn sure.

The impromptu "party" lasted a bit longer, and then a new case came in. Aaron would be flying out with Gideon and Leming the next morning, and the three of them fell into preparing for the next day while Aaron tried to ignore how strange it felt to know Dave wouldn't be with him.

He lingered longer than really necessary, calling Haley once to tell her he might be late, and then talking to her again when she called asking him about some wedding decorations that he couldn't have honestly cared any less about if he tried. "Blue is fine," he said into the phone, staring down at the crime scene photos from their new case with a frown, Dave's packing up in his peripheral vision. "'Fine' doesn't mean 'I don't like it'. It means it's fine... Well, then do yellow. I... Whatever you want."

Aaron watched as Dave got up from no-longer-their-desk and headed for the elevator.

"Honey, I have to go. Blue, yellow, neon pink, I don't care... I love you too," he said quickly, and hung up, standing to go to follow Dave. He caught up with him at the elevator. "Going down?"

Dave glanced over at him, torn between being amused and being annoyed at the conversation he'd only heard snatches of. "Yup. You all set to work with Leming from now on?" He smiled faintly.

Aaron glanced over at him. "I'm not sure I wouldn't rather have a root canal," he said, his voice quiet. "But I'll make sacrifices if it means your eventual fame in the world of books," he teased gently.

Dave snorted. "I'll dedicate all my books to you," he joked. He stuck his hands in his pockets and turned back to the elevator, watching the numbers light up. "It'll be weird," he said finally. "I've been a cop of one kind or another for over half my life."

Aaron nodded, following Dave's gaze up to the numbers. "You won't know what to do with yourself for a while," he said. "And then eventually, you'll figure out that your life isn't meaningless without us." He kept his tone light, because it was a strange thing to say. Dave probably thought it was a load of crap, too, coming from a man who'd nearly given up a relationship over a decade old for the BAU. 

And maybe it was a load of crap. Aaron wasn't sure.

Dave didn't say anything until the elevator doors opened. There was no one inside. "I hope you're right," he murmured then. It was why he was leaving, after all. He reached out to hold the elevator doors open, then glanced at Aaron. But words failed him just then. He was glad to be leaving like this, instead of how he'd tried to leave. All the same, there was an ache in his chest that just wouldn't go away. Sometimes he wanted passionately to be _away_ , and other times he was actually _afraid_ of going.

Aaron walked into the elevator and waited for Dave to join him. When the elevator doors closed behind them, it was incredibly silent for a long while. It was both comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. Aaron drew a deep breath. "I don't know what I'm going to do with myself for a while, either," he admitted, staring ahead of himself.

"Probably take over the entire BAU," Dave said without rancor. "You'll be SAC before you know it." He leaned against the wall, his gaze on Aaron's profile despite himself. God, he needed to get away. He ought to spend the next month somewhere they'd never had a case together. The Grand Canyon, maybe, or the Maine coast. He wondered if he could get away with coming back to Virginia the week before the wedding.

Aaron shook his head, but didn't argue. He didn't like to talk about it, but he knew the section chief had his eye on Aaron already, even if it would be several years before they'd consider promoting him. "You know what I mean," he said quietly.

Dave laughed faintly and nodded. "I know," he agreed. "You'll be all right. Anyway, you'll always know how to find me." Implicit in those words were, _And if you ever need me, I'll come_.

Aaron looked at Dave, his lips curling up just a little. "I know." He nodded, but didn't look away. He couldn't quite look away, even if he thought he probably should. "You have everything packed and ready to do?"

"Pretty much." Dave shrugged. "You know, Richmond really isn't all that far away." It wasn't far enough, he was certain. But every time he'd looked somewhere further afield, it had felt wrong.

"I know," Aaron said, and finally sighed and looked away. "So, do you have time for a drink, then?"

"Of course." Dave smiled. _For you, always_. He sighed. "This is the right thing to do, Aaron," he said quietly. He wasn't sure which of them he was reassuring.

"I know," Aaron said for the third time. The elevator doors dinged open. "Come on. First round's on me."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part Two - In which we jump to canon Season Three

**2007**

Dave remembered Erin Strauss as an ambitious, cast-iron bitch. It was nice to see some things never changed. So many other things had. He glanced around as he left, taking in the new surroundings. He had a feeling no one had to share a desk any more.

He'd sort of been hoping to run into Aaron while he was here to meet with Strauss, but at the same time he felt relieved as he got into the elevator without seeing him. Of course she was going to seek Aaron's approval, but they all knew he wouldn't need Aaron's permission to come back, or hers. The director would have him back in an instant. The job was Dave's for the taking.

Maybe he should have done this a little differently. Left the decision in Aaron's hands. Waited for Aaron to come to him. Then again, there was still that fear that Aaron wouldn't have come to him at all.

Two weeks ago he'd received an unsigned letter in the mail. It was the sort of thing he would never even have seen, if it had been sent to his publisher or his agent. Instead it had come to his home address, which was something very few people had. The electric company and the phone company, his three ex-wives, and Aaron--and the Bureau.

When he opened it, he hadn't been surprised to recognize the handwriting, or that it was succinct and unsigned. This letter wouldn't need a signature.

_Come back. Aaron needs you._

No signature, but it was Gideon's handwriting. Dave had made some calls and found out that Gideon had vanished into thin air, with nothing but a letter to a young protege--someone who wasn't Aaron. Dave recognized some of the names on the team--Prentiss was an ambassador's daughter, Morgan was spoken well of in many circles, Doctor Reid had written numerous articles. But none of them could be over thirty-five or thereabouts. Brilliant minds, all of them, but young.

So Dave was going back. He just hoped Aaron wouldn't be angry.

The last thing Aaron had ever expected to hear from Erin Strauss was that David Rossi wanted to come back to the FBI--more specifically, the BAU. Aaron had seen Dave over the years, though never quite as much as Aaron would have liked. Of course, Dave wasn't around Quantico much, and it was no secret Dave and Haley didn't get along. But Dave was returning _now_? For all the times in Aaron's life he'd wished he would see Dave more often, this was possibly the _worst_ time for Dave to come back.

Gideon was gone. Haley was gone, for all intents and purposes. Dave would see right through Aaron, see the pain he was trying to hide, and Aaron knew it. Not to mention, Aaron had _changed_ immensely from the time Dave and Aaron had worked together. Occasional meetings in relaxed settings, Christmas dinners and the like, the rare occasions he'd been able to spend time with Dave over the past few years were very different from the way Aaron was on a daily basis now. Aaron had no desire for the way Dave saw him to change, but he knew it would.

And it had to be on Dave's first case back when Dave steamrolled over the team and Aaron had to reprimand him. And if Aaron hadn't been immersed in the case, he might have recognized it right then instead of several hours later: it was possibly one of the most surreal moments of Aaron's life. Things didn't get much easier when Dave walked into Aaron's office after they were back to Quantico and proceeded to point out everything Aaron had been hoping Dave would be more tactful about. Apparently, even ten years hadn't schooled Dave any more on tact than it had subtlety, and Aaron felt a bit like he'd done all the changing for both of them.

It was late by the time he left the office. The bullpen was empty and Dave's office was dark, and Aaron didn't really want to go home to an empty house, but there was only so long he could put off the inevitable. He pressed the elevator button and pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a long, breathy sigh.

"You know, the long hours are hell on a marriage," Dave said. He'd been sitting on a bench by the elevators for the past forty minutes, waiting to see how long it would take Aaron to leave. It was strange, working with Aaron again. On the one hand, Dave almost felt like they didn't know each other any more. But at the same time, they could still read each other. Despite the way he'd fucked things up out there, Aaron had been at his shoulder the whole time. Even while chewing him out, which had been both the weirdest and most oddly familiar moment of his life.

Aaron sucked in a breath and jerked his head toward the direction of Dave's voice, and for a moment he just stared and then shook his head and looked away. "How long have you been sitting there?"

Dave checked his watch. "Forty minutes or so? Everyone else has been gone at least an hour, Aaron. You're working too hard." Not that he didn't know why. Not that he didn't understand. He'd done it himself, after all.

"Too hard is subjective," Aaron said, not really looking at Dave. "You waited forty minutes in a mostly dark lobby to lecture me on my work habits?" he asked, and looked back at Dave. The elevator door dinged open and Aaron held it without turning to look.

Dave joined Aaron in the elevator. "Maybe I waited forty minutes in a mostly dark lobby to tell you that you did good work on this case," he said, his lips quirking a little. As if Aaron needed validation from him or anyone, these days. To tell the truth, the case had Dave feeling more than a little like a dinosaur, a relic of some almost-forgotten past when fax machines were exciting new technology and typewriters weren't extinct.

Aaron gave Dave a look, and was struck yet again with another shining example of how things had changed. When Aaron had joined the team, Dave's praise always warmed Aaron. Now it just felt unnecessary, and Aaron had no idea how to respond. "Are you going to tell me what this 'unfinished business' is, or am I going to be surprised?" _Again_ , he almost said, but was fortunate enough to catch it.

Dave folded his arms across his chest and looked at Aaron, trying to hide his hurt. Maybe this had been a mistake. Three years since they'd last seen each other was a long time--the decade plus since they were partners, even more--and even if Aaron had greeted him warmly, Dave had fucked up royally on this case. He had the horrible feeling that he'd disappointed Aaron, quite possibly more than he ever had before. And he'd disappointed Aaron plenty of times, there was no question of that. But this... He cleared his throat. "I sort of thought you'd know," he said quietly, and looked away.

Aaron frowned at Dave, shaking his head slowly even as he thought about it, trying to think of why Dave would want to be back here, working _under_ Aaron after so many years and enough money from book sales that he could coast for the rest of his life. Aaron shook his head and looked away. "Are you settled in?" God, this was just like the last elevator ride they'd shared together at Quantico, except he was asking if Dave was settled instead of if he was ready to leave.

Dave shrugged. Aaron had no idea, did he? God, what was Dave even doing here? "Shithead doesn't like the new apartment much. I think it's because Mucci spends so much time inside now. There was more room for him down in Williamsburg."

Aaron's lips curled slightly, in spite of the fact that he still felt a little on edge. At least Dave had stopped pushing on the marriage subject, though. "I'm amazed that cat is still alive." He glanced up. "Did you get either of your second two wives to call him 'Shithead'?"

Dave laughed faintly, remembering the old joke. "Rita tried, but she said she felt ridiculous. Doris flat refused. I'm afraid I've never met anyone who lived up to the Hotshot standard." God, this felt almost awkward, trying to remember all their old rhythms and silences. _This was a terrible mistake_ , he thought suddenly.

"I don't think I ever once called him that... not out loud," Aaron replied, his smile widening in increments. If he remembered correctly, he'd called it 'cat' more often than not. Aaron swallowed and shifted on his feet, the hint of a smile fading again--God, the _cat_ might not even like him now.

Dave looked at him, surprised. "Why does it feel like you did?" he said, smiling crookedly. "Well." He hadn't been wrong about one thing--no one else had ever lived up to Aaron. He sighed and looked up at the numbers. "Unsubs don't change," he said quietly, echoing what he'd said earlier, "but it seems like everything else has."

"When you see something everyday it doesn't feel like it changes at all. It all happens so slowly over time," Aaron said. "And then something reminds you and it feels like light years." He glanced up at Dave, hoping he wasn't going to take that the wrong way. "And I'm not speaking only about the job." He sighed. "I am glad you're here," he added after a pause. _Even if I had to call you out for your behavior today, and even if you started questioning my failing marriage less than forty-eight hours after seeing you again for the first time in far too long. God, how is this going to work?_

Dave looked back at Aaron. He still wished he hadn't done this. "I didn't come here to step on your toes, Aaron," he replied. "I heard about Gideon, and..." He shrugged and looked away again. "I thought maybe you might need me."

Aaron nodded. "And I just said, I'm glad you're here."

Dave glanced back at him and smiled faintly. "I'm sorry," he blurted. "About Texas."

Aaron blinked at him for a moment, almost surprised. Almost. Except that he hadn't missed the way Dave had reacted to him when they talked in his office. "I get it. Sharing is a learned skill." He looked away. "You'll get there." He paused for a moment, then added, "I have every faith in you."

"Ah, hell, you just had to say that, didn't you," Dave said, mostly because he didn't like apologizing and would rather make light of it. "Now I'm going to have to be on my best behavior."

"Yes, you are," Aaron said, but he turned and smiled at Dave anyway, feeling slightly better somehow.

"You heading home, or you want to get something to eat?" Dave said. "You probably know the good restaurants around here better than I do, these days."

Aaron considered it for a moment as the elevator doors dinged open and they stepped out. He hadn't been wanting to go home anyway, and maybe they could catch up in a more neutral setting. "I didn't eat dinner. Yeah, let's go out."

Dave still drove fast, but it was past dark, and his night vision wasn't what it used to be. He followed Aaron to a quiet restaurant, where they settled in at a booth. Dave ordered a beer and a cheeseburger with fries, then wondered where to even start talking. He shouldn't have pushed the issue about Haley earlier, even if he had been trying to make a point. Well, he'd been trying to make a couple of points, but he wasn't sure if either of them had been worth it. Haley was Aaron's weak spot, and always had been, and Dave knew that.

He hadn't spent this much time feeling ashamed of himself since...well, since Rita divorced him, actually. Divorced him because she thought he was having an affair, until he'd finally confessed that wasn't the case. He had married her to try to forget Aaron. He _had_ loved Rita, but not enough.

Dave took a sip of his beer and sighed, looking at the tabletop.

Aaron cleared his throat and took a sip of his tea. "Thanks," he murmured.

Dave looked up at him, confused. "For what?"

"I don't believe for a second you didn't know that I didn't want to go home, _and_ ," he said quickly before Dave replied, "for the record, no, I don't want to talk about it." He sat back in his seat a bit. "But thanks all the same."

Dave smiled crookedly. "You don't think I was just being selfish?" He nudged Aaron's knee with his own, trying to ignore how good it felt. "It's been too long, Aaron."

"It has," Aaron said. "Shithead and... Moxie not very good company?" he asked after a moment, raising an eyebrow.

Dave laughed. "Mucci. You know, the hero of Bataan. They're good company. But they don't tell me when I'm being an egotistical jerk." He sipped his beer. "Maybe I should get a parrot."

Aaron stared at Dave for a moment, not sure how to take that, but then his lips quirked to the side. "You'd teach it to say that?" And then Aaron thought of Reid, and how Reid would probably be spouting something about parrots not really understanding what they were saying anyway, so it wouldn't be quite the same... only Reid would say it with a lot more technical words and possibly statistics. "Reid seems to be quite taken with you."

"You're comparing Doctor Reid to a parrot?" Dave said, raising his eyebrows.

Aaron had been trying to hide a smile in his mug, but he chuckled softly at that. "No--Non sequitur."

Dave laughed and shook his head. "He's nice. A little...ah, enthusiastic. But he's obviously brilliant." He'd been overwhelming, in fact, rattling on about all the computerized information and the interviews they'd done since Dave left. But Dave liked him.

"Enthusiastic is a good word for it," Aaron agreed, nodding. "And he's probably read all of your books a half dozen times, in spite of having them memorized the first time," he said, smiling softly.

"Memorized? God, they're not _that_ good." Dave sipped at his beer, then flashed the waitress a smile when she arrived with their food.

"He has a eidetic memory." Aaron thanked the waitress and started in on his food. "And an IQ of 187, and can read 20,000 words a minute."

"Right, I'll keep that in mind. If I want Doctor Reid to remember anything, I write it down for him. Not in a little notebook." Dave glanced up at Aaron, thinking of his old list of Aaron's faults--the list that had only ever had two things on it: "perfectionist", and "too fucking married".

Aaron might have been irritated by that little call back to their earlier conversation if Dave's voice hadn't sounded a little too warm when he said it. "See, you're learning already. Who said you can't teach old dogs new tricks?" he murmured, smiling, and it suddenly felt a little more like Dave's last day at the BAU ten years ago, and Aaron was calling Dave a "cranky bastard" to his face.

"Hey, who are you calling old?" Dave said, and smiled back. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad, after all. "You've gotta watch yourself, you're not getting any younger, either."

"But you've saved me from being the oldest on the team. I was worried after Gideon left." Aaron's smile slipped, and he hid it in his mug of tea.

Dave's smile faded. "What happened, Aaron? Gideon was...the best. Now no one even knows where he is." Dave had a postmark, Wilson's Creek, Arkansas, but he had a feeling that wasn't Gideon's final destination. If Gideon even had a final destination in mind.

"You didn't hear?" Aaron asked. Of course, no one on the team was really talking about it, in spite of the fact he was nearly certain Reid was probably carrying around that note wherever he went, but people talked outside of the team.

Dave shrugged. "I heard he left. I didn't want to hear anything else from someone besides you. I know you were close." And distance, not to mention the unsigned note, had increased his own fondness for Jason Gideon. Anyway, he had always--always--respected Gideon.

"Did you hear about Frank Breitkopf?" Aron asked.

"There was a showdown at the train station," Dave said, nodding. "The press wasn't exactly kind. Not that we've ever expected that."

"He jumped in front of the train with a civilian. That wasn't the reason Gideon left, though." Aaron drew a deep breath. "Frank went out of his way to murder one of Gideon's close friends in his home." Aaron had a feeling she was more than a friend, but Gideon had always kept things like that to himself.

"My God," Dave breathed, and had to suppress the instinct to cross himself. "He...God. That's..." It was worse when it hit home. You could hold on to your objectivity when they weren't your friends. You could compartmentalize. But Gideon... Dave shook his head.

Aaron nodded, his expression solemn. "It was abrupt, but we can hardly blame him." That didn't mean that it didn't sting to not have heard a word, but Aaron still understood.

"I seem to recall a time when another guy tried to leave the Bureau," Dave said slowly. "You went looking for him. I guess Gideon didn't want to be found?" The note folded into his wallet felt significant suddenly, as if he were keeping a horrible secret. But he _knew_ that Gideon wouldn't want Aaron to know he'd interfered, and Dave wasn't sure he was ready to admit that he'd come here for Aaron, since Aaron didn't seem to realize it. _It was a private communication,_ he reasoned. _From Gideon to me._

"Yeah, well, I didn't have that opportunity this time," Aaron replied, and he wasn't quite able to keep the bitterness from his tone. "There was nothing to be gained from it this time, though. That's not the sort of thing you can reason out."

"I'm sorry," Dave said quietly. "Especially after what happened in Boston. Gideon's a good man." He sighed, then glanced up at Aaron. "Though I was right, you did end up running the place. In my opinion there's no finer man for the job."

"This wasn't exactly how I wanted to do it," Aaron said, suddenly not wanting to talk about it any more.

"I know." Dave studied his face as they ate. Aaron looked weary, as if he'd shouldered too many burdens for too long. Dave wondered if there was any of that burden he could help with. How much of it was the job and how much of it was Haley? "It's a fine team," he said finally, changing the subject. "Am I right in thinking you brought most of them in?"

"Some of them," Aaron answered, then laughed softly. "Though I nearly turned Emily away before she even started." He shook his head and offered Dave a wry smile. "She... surprised me."

"Didn't expect much from the ambassador's daughter?" Dave teased. He gave Aaron a speculative glance, hoping he wasn't right. "She's very pretty."

"Emily?" Aaron asked, giving Dave a lopsided smile. "Should I be warning her to watch out?" he asked. "I don't want to have to recommend you for a transfer so early, Dave, but I will if I have to."

Dave sucked beer down the wrong way when he inhaled, then coughed. "My God, no," he sputtered, torn between amusement and disappointment. Maybe whatever they'd had between them had faded for Aaron. He caught his breath, then added, "You have my word, Aaron, I didn't come back to the Bureau looking for Wife Number Four."

"You worried me a moment." Aaron hid a smile at Dave choking. He had been worried, at first, when Dave seemed to be looking at JJ the wrong way. And Aaron wasn't sure if Dave backed off because he saw Aaron's reaction, or if Dave really hadn't meant it the way it had initially sounded at all. "Good."

Dave just studied Aaron's face, shaking his head faintly. Finally he just turned his attention back to his beer.

Aaron's smile faded. "What?"

"Nothing." Dave cleared his throat. "Just..." He shrugged. "Wondering what's changed."

Aaron's eyes narrowed in thought. "Are you speaking specifically or abstractly?"

Dave shrugged. _I'm talking about us,_ he didn't say. _You're more serious and tired. I'm...what? How have I changed?_ He took another sip of his beer.

Aaron frowned. He'd thought things had been going well, but that didn't appear to be the case any more. Dave looked, somehow, disappointed. "If... I've said something to offend you..."

Dave jerked his gaze back up. "Of course not. Come on, Aaron, this is me. I don't exactly offend easily." He smiled faintly. "I guess maybe I'm wondering if I'm too old for this." It wasn't the whole truth, but it definitely wasn't a lie.

Aaron gave him a smile, one that said he wasn't quite certain he believed that was really what Dave was thinking, and said, "You're hardly old."

"Fifty-two. Getting up there." Dave's smile strengthened a little. "Ah, I don't know." He waved a hand in dismissal and drained his beer.

"I'm not too terribly far behind you," Aaron said, looking down at his mostly empty plate.

Dave snorted and shook his head. "So where are you living these days? Still in the old house?" He wondered a moment later if that had been an insensitive question, because of the separation.

Aaron nodded slowly, but didn't say anything for a moment. He didn't want to lead right back into discussing Haley. "Yes, I am," he said finally. "How about you?"

"Well, no, I moved to Williamsburg after Rita, you know? She got the house in Richmond. Anyway, I kept the Williamsburg place, but I'm renting a house here." He smiled. "I wasn't sure you wouldn't throw me out on my ear. Didn't want to burn all my bridges."

"Smart move," Aaron replied wryly.

Dave glanced up at him. "Shit. I blew it today, didn't I?" The question was half-serious, though he wasn't sure if Aaron realized it.

"You're lucky I still like you," Aaron said. He rubbed his hand over his forehead and sat back. "I need to go home and get some sleep." He looked up. "You do too. You're not retired any more."

Dave laughed, feeling relieved. "You think being retired meant I didn't have a schedule? Research, writing, consulting, speaking...Hell, being back at the BAU is going to give me a chance to slow down." He grinned across the table at Aaron and waved their waitress over. When she would have put the bill on the table, he took it. "This one's on me."

Aaron went for the check and then frowned at Dave. "You don't have to--"

Dave's grin widened. "This one's on me. You can get the next one."

Next one? Aaron's frown faded and he shook his head. "Fine."

When they reached the parking lot a few minutes later, Dave stopped Aaron before he turned to his car, with just a brief touch to his shoulder. "We shouldn't have lost touch, Aaron," he said quietly. "I'm sorry about that. I know it was my fault."

Aaron shook his head. "No, it wasn't. I should have made more time." _I should have made more time for everyone--you, Haley, Jack._

"I know what this life is like. I should have nagged you more often." Dave shook his head. "You may think I'm crazy, but it's good to be back."

"I don't think you're crazy at all." Aaron reached out and squeezed Dave's shoulder. "If I did, where would that leave me?" He offered a self-deprecating smile and started towards his car.

Dave smiled. "See you tomorrow."

*****

Dave had held a book in his hands all the way home, but he couldn't concentrate on reading. He wasn't interested in joining the others, particularly after his little confrontation with Morgan after they took out Henry Frost. He had no doubt that Morgan _was_ relentless, and probably perceptive enough--and stubborn enough--to dig up the information he might need to put together Dave's main reason for coming back to the Bureau. Still, even that concern was at the back of his thoughts as he stared out the window of the jet all the way back to Quantico.

He hadn't lied when he'd told Morgan that Ruby Ridge and Waco started him thinking about leaving the Bureau. He'd been a cop before becoming a federal agent. He'd spent nearly half his life trying to protect people by the time Ruby Ridge happened in 1992...and suddenly he was viewed as the enemy, the outsider, a murderer. All because he worked for the FBI. It had shaken his faith, not just in his career, but in who he was.

Of course, that faith had been restored by an earnest younger man--a man whose voice spoke suddenly from just behind him as they walked into the BAU.

"You okay?" Aaron said softly. He'd started toward his own office, but then turned to follow Dave without a word until they were both inside.

Dave glanced over his shoulder and sighed, then went further into his office. The painters were finished, the walls a dark green that ought to absolutely fascinate Emily Prentiss while she tried to figure out if he was interested in fertility or creativity. At least Doctor Reid had tried to resist the urge to profile him. "I don't much like western states any more," he said finally. The chairs were still piled high with boxes and covered with drop clothes, so he dropped his ready bag on the floor and, after a moment, sat on the floor himself, leaning against his desk.

Aaron watched him, almost amused that Dave was sitting on the floor of his own office. Though, if Aaron was truthful, he couldn't _stop_ watching Dave lately. And yes, part of that was professional--they couldn't afford to have Dave run roughshod over an investigation again--but it was more than just that. It was partly because, by some twist of fate, Aaron had an old friend thrown back into his life exactly when he needed it the most.

And because Aaron was _watching_ Dave, he was _thinking_ about Dave and their history for the first time in years. It was obvious Dave had moved on. He'd been married twice since he'd left the BAU, made a successful career for himself... moved on. And so had Aaron. Aaron found himself reminding himself lately that just because his own private life was falling apart lately, didn't mean that Dave's was too, and that the last time he turned to Dave during a moment of emotional crisis, it had ended in disaster.

Aaron sighed and walked over to the desk and sat against the edge, looking down at Dave. "I'm not such a fan of the east coast anymore." He looked up at the walls. The smell of paint was still a little overpowering. "The green is nice."

"What do you think it says about me?" Dave asked, shifting to look at the walls. If his shoulder just happened to brush Aaron's calf...well, that was entirely intentional. But he didn't think it would look that way.

"The color?" Aaron asked, glancing at Dave again at the touch but not moving. It felt good, actually. Aaron shrugged. "There's no reason for it to symbolize envy that I can see. Or sickness. Maybe rebirth, regeneration. New growth." He liked that interpretation, so he stopped there, especially seeing as how he wasn't sure the color was even what Dave meant.

"New growth." Dave smiled faintly. "You're going to start sending me to workshops, aren't you?" He leaned his head back against the desk. "You were the reason I stayed," he murmured after a minute.

Aaron's gaze snapped down to Dave, surprised by the admission, even if Gideon had told him as much ten years ago. Aaron frowned in thought. "I know," he said quietly. "And about the other thing, I think it says that you're good at your job."

"You think so?" Dave said. He didn't look at Aaron. It was ironic how their roles had reversed. Dave looked to Aaron for approval these days, and found himself warmed when he earned it. "I was with the Hostage Rescue Team that day, Aaron. It could've been my finger on that trigger, if things had gone differently. I was there as a negotiator, but I was carrying a gun just like everyone else."

"But it wasn't you. You did your job. And what I meant was that it's a _good_ thing that, even after all this time has passed, you still care," Aaron said. "I've seen a lot of good agents burn out."

Dave laughed, though he wasn't really amused. "I don't know if anyone in my life has ever accused me of caring too much," he admitted.

"You care more easily than you want people to see," Aaron said, smiling softly. He'd wanted to say that maybe no one knew Dave quite as well as he did, but Aaron knew that was a big assumption to make after all these years of only occasionally talking, even if he and Dave were sitting here right now and all of Dave's other exes--if you could even be so bold to have called Aaron that--weren't. Still, Dave loved easily. Three marriages and at least one meaningful--Aaron hoped--whirlwind relationship with a younger co-worker were enough proof of that.

Dave's laugh came a little easier the second time. "You're the only person who believes that," he said, but his lips curled up. It was on the tip of his tongue to say Rita probably still believed that he'd never loved her at all, but he was tired of bringing up his ex-wives.

"Doesn't matter who else believes it," Aaron said. He glanced down again. "As comfortable as the floor looks... let's get out of here."

"You asking me out?" Dave joked, and stood, wincing as one of his knees cracked. "Damn, I hate getting old."

"It's inevitable." Aaron ignored the question though. He ignored the way it made him feel too. 

"So where are we going?" Dave asked, shouldering his ready bag. "I think it's your turn to buy, so make it someplace expensive."

"I thought I might put something in the microwave for you." Aaron stepped into his office for a moment to grab his things. "But I have some really fancy microwave dinners, so I hope you won't be too disappointed."

"Wow, and here you used to cook real meals for me," Dave joked. "I guess I've come down in the world."

"Maybe _I_ have," Aaron said, and then belatedly wondered if he was joking or not.

Dave snorted. "Not likely." He glanced at the bullpen, where Morgan and Prentiss were teasing Reid, who looked pleased about something. "You ought to come over and see Shithead one of these days. I'm convinced cats have a long memory. He still doesn't like Kay."

"I'm not sure I'm ready to test that theory yet," Aaron said.

Dave laughed, which made the others look over. He just shrugged and waved at them, then headed for the door, falling naturally in step with Aaron. "I'm sure he'd only bite you once or twice."

"I definitely liked it better when you really cooked for me," Dave said, pushing aside the remains of his microwave turkey, mashed potato and dressing dinner. The food hadn't really been bad, but eating together like this, in Aaron's home--in the house where they'd been _together_ , if only for a short time--kept reminding him of how things used to be. Dave had spent the past two weeks telling himself to stop longing for the past and start looking at the present with an eye toward the future. It wasn't always possible, with a history as long as his and Aaron's.

Aaron glanced at Dave, then back at his own food, without a flicker of reaction on his face. "I give you Thanksgiving in a box and you complain."

Dave laughed. "Thanksgiving in a box." He glanced down at the meal, then folded his hands in prayer. "Thank God there wasn't any more of it." He gave Aaron a teasing look.

Aaron tried not to laugh, but he ended up snorting and grinning anyway. He turned to smile at Dave and then snatched the little molded plastic container away from Dave and went to throw it away with his own. He took a moment to breathe once he was in the kitchen alone. This was a little strange having Dave here. With Haley gone, it was so reminiscent of the time they'd spent here together before. "Do you want anything to drink?" he called out into the living room, where Dave was more than likely flipping the channel _off_ of the news that Aaron had been peripherally watching.

Dave settled on some historical documentary and called back, "Sure, scotch if you have it, but anything's fine." He wasn't sure he wanted Aaron to be keeping scotch in his home. Aaron had never been as big a drinker as Dave, and while that could have changed over the years, Dave didn't want it to have changed since Haley moved out.

Aaron glanced back at the doorway, and then leaned out to look at Dave. He was momentarily distracted, frowning at the television, but turned back to look at Dave after a moment's hesitation. "I have wine. I think Haley left a bottle of rum, but I'm not sure."

"Wine sounds good." Dave shifted a little so he could look at Aaron. God, he was still as handsome as he'd ever been. Dave smiled.

Aaron looked back at Dave a moment, feeling oddly warmed by that smile. He made himself walk back into the kitchen. "It's red," he said, "and I'm changing the channel right back."

"Damn it, you know I hate the news," Dave said, but there was no heat to his argument. He stretched his legs out and leaned back into the couch, pleased. This felt familiar, comfortable, and yet there was an edge of unknown. How much _had_ they changed over the years? His feelings hadn't changed a bit, but he had no real idea if Aaron even thought about their past much any more.

"And you know I like it, and I pay for the cable," Aaron said as he walked back into the living room. This was a discussion they'd had in some form or another since their partnership began, but somehow Aaron couldn't not remember having it while straddling Dave's lap when he saw Dave stretched out like he was. Aaron handed him a glass and sat.

Dave gave an exaggerated sigh and tipped his head in defeat. "Your house, your rules," he conceded. He took a sip of the wine, swirling it for a moment to taste. "Fantastic. God, this is just like old times." He took another sip of his wine as soon as he'd said it. Damn it, he'd been trying to wait for Aaron to bring up the past before he did.

Aaron turned his head to look at Dave, then shrugged and looked into his glass. "It's a good year. I'd been saving it for a special occasion, but..." He wasn't sure what he wanted to say--everything he thought of sounded too needy--so he just took a drink and stopped talking.

Dave made a noise of amusement and held out the TV remote. "I'm not sure whether I'm flattered or insulted." That was a lie. He couldn't help being flattered that Aaron had offered him the wine he'd been saving. He decided not to think about whether Aaron had bought it before or after he and Haley split up.

Aaron took the remote and rolled his eyes. "I should have thought of it sooner. I think it would have complimented the Stouffer's."

Dave smiled at the TV, which was now showing a wildfire somewhere out west. "Nah, the company improved the food enough."

"That sounds vaguely familiar," Aaron said without thinking.

"Vaguely?" Dave's smile widened and he closed his eyes. "God, that must have been ten years ago. More. Thirteen?" He opened his eyes again to take another sip.

"Around that," Aaron said, watching the smoke rising on the television. "You don't still have my faults listed in that thing, do you?" He reached over and tapped the notebook in Dave's breast pocket, then took a sip of his wine.

Dave looked down at the notebook, feeling a pang of emotion he didn't want to identify. "I only ever got around to listing two," he murmured. "One--perfectionist. Two--too fucking married."

Aaron expelled a breath of a laugh. "You've missed a lot over the years. Workaholic. Drill sergeant. Absentee dad..." He gave Dave a sad smile. "You really should get your pen out now, or you'll never catch up."

"I don't know, I think 'perfectionist' is a pretty good catch-all for workaholic and drill sergeant." Dave shifted a little so he could see Aaron better. "And I'm willing to bet that any time you ever spent with Jack, you gave him a hundred percent of yourself."

"It's not really enough." Aaron shook his head. "None of it was. And I'd do it all again in a heartbeat." He drew a long breath and looked at Dave. "What does _that_ say about _me_?"

"It says you're selflessly dedicated to helping other people," Dave said without hesitation. "I already told you, you're the finest man I know. You're human. We all have limitations, even if you hate accepting yours."

Aaron wasn't sure what to say to that, mostly because he wanted to argue the point, argue that he was the one in the wrong. But he didn't think he would win the argument with Dave, and it didn't matter how wrong it was if he knew he was where he was supposed to be. Aaron dropped his head against the couch and swallowed, closing his eyes.

Dave licked his lips and tried to drag his eyes away from Aaron. It was impossible. "That's why perfectionist will always be number one on your list," he said, his voice a little huskier than he'd expected. He cleared his throat and turned his attention to his wine again.

The sound of Dave's voice sent an unexpected shiver down Aaron's spine, and he rolled his head to the side to look at Dave just as Dave looked away. He'd thought he saw an unexpected, but too familiar--even after all this time--expression on Dave's face just before he turned. Aaron shook himself and looked back at the TV. "Sorry."

"I'm not sure why you're apologizing," Dave said, glancing up at the TV. "I'm an arrogant, cranky bastard who's spent too much time in the limelight, I took part in one of the worst fiascoes the Bureau has ever been involved in, and I fucked up the first case I came back on...and you're apologizing for being a perfectionist." He shook his head. And this was why Aaron Hotchner was still the most powerful man Dave knew--he could get Dave to admit things like that when no one else ever could.

Aaron turned to look at Dave. It never stopped feeling good that Dave said things like that to him. Dave didn't just say that to anyone. Still, Aaron's lips curled slightly before he replied. "No. I'm apologizing because I had been meaning to make _you_ feel better."

Dave laughed faintly. "I feel fine," he said. "The company improves a lot besides the food." He told himself to stop _flirting_ with Aaron, but it was comfortable, easy.

"I happen to agree," Aaron replied, not looking away.

The look in Aaron's eyes seemed so familiar. It sent a thrill of heat through Dave, and he wondered if he still knew how to read Aaron. God, this felt good, like there was a hint of a promise that neither of them had spoken. Dave smiled slowly, his gaze warm on Aaron's.

Aaron smiled in return, feeling oddly warm even if he hadn't finished his glass of wine. He started to look down Dave's throat and chest, and then caught his wandering eyes and turned back to the TV, hoping Dave hadn't noticed.

_Oh_. That glance gave Dave his first real infusion of hope since he'd come back here. Falling back into their partnership had been fairly easy. But after spending weeks wondering if any of the old chemistry and heat was still there... It was a definite relief to know Aaron was still interested in looking. Dave sipped his wine and glanced back at the TV, feeling oddly excited.

Aaron drew a breath and shifted down on the couch, and possibly slightly closer to Dave, even as he told himself he was being stupid. The last thing he needed right now was to start thinking about this as more than it was. They watched the news for a bit longer and Aaron was starting to feel his eyes grow heavy. "We had a long day. You're welcome to stay if you want to. The guest bedroom is actually finished now."

Dave raised an eyebrow, thinking it over. He really ought to go home and check on his pets, but he'd had a friend feeding them while he was in Montana, and he hadn't yet called to say he was home... Come to think of it, he ought to see if Doris wanted to take custody of Mucci; it wasn't fair to keep a hunting dog in an apartment. He rubbed a hand over his face. "Sounds good, actually," he said. "If I wouldn't be in the way." He knew Aaron wouldn't have made the offer just to be polite, but it seemed like good manners to say it, anyway. _The guest bedroom isn't really what I'm interested in, but I can be patient. For a while._

"In the way of what?" Aaron countered. He looked over and smiled faintly at Dave. "You think that, after you mocked my very generous offer of frozen food and my choice of entertainment, I wouldn't have gotten rid of you already if I didn't want you here?"

"Good point. You must not have anything better to do if you're inviting me over," Dave teased. "Let me grab my ready bag out of the car. I think I still have a clean change of clothes left."

"All right," Aaron said, and pushed off the couch to take their wine glasses to the sink. It seemed like a waste to open the bottle and then go right to bed, but they really didn't need to get drunk.

When Dave came in from the car, he dropped his bag by the front door, then glanced over at the TV, which was now off. "Going to bed already?" he asked mildly. He wouldn't really mind, but at the same time, he was reluctant to let the evening end yet.

"You're welcome to stay up if you want," Aaron called back. They didn't have to go in tomorrow, but Aaron was planning on it anyway. Somehow, he didn't think he should mention that. He was already planning to slip out before Dave was awake and leave him a key to let himself out. Even if he did _want_ to stay up with Dave.

"Nah, the only reason to stay up is the company," Dave said, smiling as Aaron came back in. He picked up his bag and glanced around, wondering if the guest bedroom was where he expected it to be.

"Sorry," Aaron said, then inclined his head down the hallway and started going that way to show Dave where he was sleeping. He tried to ignore the tiny voice that told him he could offer Dave _his_ bed. "Maybe I'm old enough for the both of us."

"Maybe you've just forgotten how to relax," Dave teased. He followed Aaron down the hall, trying not to remember other times they'd done this, with considerably less clothing on.

Aaron hummed thoughtfully, a little amused. "Maybe I don't want to remember." He pushed open the door to the guest bedroom and stood aside.

"Oh, that's just sad," Dave murmured. He gave Aaron a lopsided smile. "Maybe you need to be reminded. For your own good." He walked into the guest bedroom and looked around in assessment, then put his ready bag on the bed.

"I'm not sure there's anyone up for the challenge," Aaron replied. _Except you_ , he realized a moment later, because he felt more relaxed now than he had in some time. "Let me know if you need anything," he said, then turned in the doorway to go, waiting for a moment to see if Dave _did_ need anything.

Dave glanced over at Aaron, that smile lingering on his face. _What I need, you're not ready for_ , he thought. _But at least now I know it's not hopeless._ "I'm fine, thanks. I hope you're not planning on getting up too early. Saturdays are still my day to sleep in, as long as JJ doesn't call us in."

"I won't wake you," Aaron said. "I have a fairly relentless internal alarm clock," he added, and then headed down the hall to get ready for bed. "Good night, Dave."

*****

Dave woke up early the next day, though at least it was daylight out. He sat up, rubbing a hand over his face, then swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He thought he could hear a shower running somewhere in the house, which meant Aaron was probably going in to the office. Somehow that didn't surprise him. The Aaron of today wasn't quite his Aaron, who had given everything he had to his job, but had also known how to relax.

Dave pulled on a t-shirt and decided t-shirt and boxers was dressed enough, then headed out to the kitchen, where he rummaged around in the refrigerator and cabinets until he found the fixings for Italian omelets. There was some microwave bacon in the freezer, so by the time the shower turned off, Dave had managed a halfway decent breakfast, and had a pot of tea brewed on the counter.

Dave hadn't been awake when Aaron had gotten in the shower, but when Aaron emerged from the bathroom the house smelled far too good. Aaron ignored the way his stomach insisted on going to the kitchen, and went back to his room in his boxers and undershirt to tug on his shirt and a pair of pants. He didn't bother to dry his hair or button his shirt before he went down to the kitchen, though, and he walked inside and went straight for... not coffee. Tea. He sincerely hoped Dave hadn't made the decaf, and frowned at his coffee mug. "I thought you slept in on Saturdays."

"I heard the shower and suspected you were planning to go to work today," Dave said, his voice serene. "So I decided to disrupt your plans."

Aaron sighed and looked at the food. It had taken more effort than he had expended the night before. He gave Dave a look half-way between appreciation and exasperation. "I'll stay and eat," he conceded.

"You'll eat, and then you'll put on jeans, if you still own any, and we're not going in to the office today," Dave said, looking calmly at him. He did his best to make his voice as implacable as possible in the hopes that Aaron wouldn't argue with him.

"I still own a pair of jeans or two." Aaron poured himself some tea and sat down next to Dave. "I'll eat, then leave you a key to lock up, and I'm going in." He was starting to think that he might not win this argument no matter what he said, however, if the look on Dave's face was any indication.

"You're not going to work today, Aaron," Dave said again. "You need to learn to take a day off now and then. In fact, if I have anything to say about it--and I have do plenty to say about it, actually--you won't go in tomorrow, either."

Aaron stared at Dave for a moment, then decided not to argue. If he really wanted to leave, Aaron seriously doubted Dave would actually _physically_ stop him from leaving the house. He hoped. He looked down at his plate. "When did you learn how to cook?" he asked.

Dave shrugged. "After Rita left me. She took the microwave. The omelets would be better if you had real Parmesan, by the way." He gave Aaron a faint smile.

Aaron gave Dave a look. "When did you become so impossible to please?" he asked, and then smiled and took a bite of his breakfast.

Dave snorted. "Some time before I met Rita, apparently."

_I never had trouble pleasing you before, though_ , Aaron thought, but just shook his head and kept eating.

Aaron apparently wasn't ready for ex-wife jokes, so Dave shrugged. "I'm really not that hard to please," he murmured. "Spend today with me, and I'll be pleased."

Aaron laughed softly, and thought about ignoring it, but then looked at Dave again. "You're not going to relent, are you?"

"Nope. You know how stubborn I am." Dave finished his omelet and started carrying dishes to the dishwasher.

Aaron lifted his eyebrows and watched Dave with a sigh, though he was mildly amused that Dave had just made himself right at home. Aaron shifted in his seat to watch Dave move around the kitchen.

When Dave had cleaned up everything but Aaron's plate, he turned and leaned against the counter, looking back at Aaron. "Finished?" It occurred to him that Aaron was mostly dressed and he was...in boxers and a t-shirt. Somehow it had seemed like a better idea before he was completely awake.

Aaron looked back at his plate, realizing a moment too late that he'd been staring at Dave. "Yeah, I'm done," he said. "Thanks."

Dave nudged Aaron's shoulder. "Jeans. And maybe even a t-shirt. You have any of those left?" He glanced over his shoulder so Aaron could see he was teasing. "And maybe you'll let me use your shower."

Aaron turned in his seat to face Dave and forced his eyes not to wander. "So you're keeping me from work. What do you plan on doing with me?" It was slightly suggestive. Just maybe. But it could just as easily be taken as a simple question too.

Dave raised his eyebrows. "Oh, the possibilities are endless," he said lightly. He could think of quite a few things he'd _like_ to do with him, of course, but he was still trying to think of something that wasn't indecent.

"Mmm, I'm not sure that's a good enough answer," Aaron said, and got up to put his cup in the sink and run water in it.

"I'll make sure it involves something dirty," Dave promised, and let just a hint of innuendo creep into his voice. Aaron didn't have to know he was thinking about hiking.

Aaron's eyebrows went up and he looked at Dave. Was he supposed to take that the way Dave was seemingly implying it? "You can talk me into a lot of things, Dave," he said, walking toward the hall, because he apparently _was_ going to have to dig his jeans out. "But if you think you can talk me into mud wrestling, you're going to be sorely disappointed."

Dave laughed and shook his head. "Fine, I'll think of something else. You're no fun."

Twenty minutes later Dave was showered and dressed in jeans and a button-down khaki shirt, which was all he'd had left clean. It was strange, wondering if Aaron would even _want_ to go hiking. They never had really spent a lot of recreation time together when they were actually doing something. They'd had meals and movies and plenty of time relaxing in front of the TV, but Dave didn't have much to draw on when he tried to think of what to suggest they do for the day.

Aaron had found jeans easily, but a t-shirt that wasn't an undershirt was more of a challenge. Still, he wandered out into the living room dressed casually and looked at Dave. "Did you have enough time to come up with something?" he asked, fully intent on letting Dave choose, considering he'd ruined Aaron's plans for the day. Admittedly, Aaron's plans hadn't been overly exciting, but that wasn't the point.

"I was thinking about Prince William Forest Park, actually," Dave said, shoving his hands in his pockets. God, Aaron looked _good_ dressed down. It startled Dave into giving him a quick once-over, though when he caught himself he tried to make light of it. "I see you found a t-shirt."

Aaron looked down at himself, then back at Dave. "What were you thinking about Prince William Forest Park?"

"It's a good place for hiking. Thirty-seven miles of trails, lots of wildlife. I promise not to shoot anything." Dave kept looking at Aaron, hoping for a clue about whether it sounded like fun or torture.

Aaron nodded. It wouldn't have been his first choice. Actually, he couldn't remember the last time he'd done anything quite so... 'outdoorsy'. But it wasn't a bad suggestion. "Okay. I suppose we've spent enough time on the couch because of me."

"Not that I'm objecting to couches in general, but it _is_ getting harder to pass my physical every year," Dave joked. He headed for the front door. "I'll drive. I don't suppose I can get you to promise to leave your cell phone in the truck."

"Absolutely not," Aaron said, and headed out the door behind Dave. "You have realized by now that you're going to be doing a lot more running around now that your back at the BAU than you did on book tours, though, right?"

Dave sighed and shook his head. "Yeah, and climbing places like Black Eagle Peak, I get it. Need to get back in shape, I guess."

Aaron glanced back at Dave, but got in the car without comment. The drive to the park was filled with quiet conversation, and when they got there, Aaron got out and squinted into the sun for a moment before putting his sunglasses on. "I have to be honest, I'm not sure I've ever gone hiking when it wasn't required of me on the job," he said, looking around.

Dave glanced at him anxiously. "Bad choice?" he asked, unhappy at the thought.

Aaron looked over at Dave. "No." He wasn't certain of that, actually, but Dave didn't need to know that.

Dave smiled. "I'll take it easy on you," he promised, and had to drag his gaze away from Aaron. He led the way to a trailhead and set off through the trees, trying to keep to a moderate-to-easy pace. Aaron was in good shape--you had to be, in their work--but Dave wasn't really interested in exercise today. He just wanted quiet companionship, and this was one of the places he'd always liked.

The trails weren't particularly difficult, and Aaron still wasn't certain this would have ever been his _choice_ for a day trip, but he had to admit it had its good points. It was relaxing--though Aaron had to concede to himself he'd been more at ease outside of work with Dave at his side than he had been outside of work in a long time--and the scenery was nice.

Late in the morning they came across a cabin camp that seemed mostly empty. One of the cabins had blankets and towels spread over the stairway railing, but the others looked unoccupied, and no one was around. Dave went over to the nearest cabin and settled down on the steps. It had been a good morning, though occasionally the thought had drifted through his head that maybe it was time to talk about the past. _Their_ past, specifically, rather than past cases and catching up.

He still didn't think either of them were ready for that conversation, though. Every time he thought about confessing that he still loved Aaron, his chest clenched up a little. He just shaded his eyes and squinted up at the sky.

Aaron sat next to Dave and didn't say anything for a moment. The silence wasn't uncomfortable, but when David Rossi was silent for too long, it never failed to catch Aaron's notice. "Should I be worried?" he asked mildly.

"Worried?" Dave glanced over at him, amused. "I didn't lure you out here to kill you."

"I would hope I would have noticed if you were that off balance this morning. I have known you an awfully long time," Aaron replied.

"Longer than anyone else has been able to put up with me," Dave said, leaning back on his elbows.

Aaron looked back at Dave and smiled softly. "You're usually never quiet for such an extended period of time."

Dave shrugged. "I dunno. I'm feeling nostalgic." He glanced over at Aaron, warmed by the expression on his face.

"Yeah?" Aaron pressed the heels of his hands against the wood step and gripped the edge lightly, looking back at the landscape, watching the the scattering of leaves drifting from the trees on the breeze.

"Having you around again." Dave closed his eyes, tilting his face up to the sun. "I forgot how happy I was when we were younger."

That comment made something in Aaron's chest ache a little, and he nodded. "Things were easier then." Aaron shifted to lean against the side of the railing. "Most things, anyway. Not all." It had been one of the hardest decisions in his life having to choose between Dave and Haley, but outside of that, life was easier in general.

Dave nodded, not opening his eyes. "Most things." Hell, loving Aaron had been simple. Walking away had been what was hard. "You ever hear from Conover or Leming these days?"

"Leming kept in touch for a while. We were partners, you know," Aaron said wryly. It had never been the same after Dave left, and Aaron was certain Dave probably knew that. "Conover disappeared off the grid."

"I get Christmas cards from Leming sometimes." Dave shook his head. "I've never met a man with less sense of humor. Good man, though. Solid. He a good partner?" _Not as good as me, was he?_

"He wasn't bad. He was good at what he did." Aaron glanced back at Dave. "We never worked together quite as well as you and I did, but it _did_ work." If Aaron was honest, part of the reason he preferred the team dynamic was that they all complimented each other in a way Aaron had never had since Dave had left the Bureau. It was easier to mesh with a team than an individual, even if Dave had always seemed to balance him so well.

Dave laughed faintly and looked sideways at Aaron. "I don't think I've ever gotten along with anyone the way you and I did." He turned to look at Aaron more openly. "Do," he corrected. He admired Aaron--his dedication and drive, his humility, his passion--and he trusted him. More than anything, that was why Dave had been willing to come back and work under Aaron's leadership.

Aaron couldn't help but smile at that. "You push me beyond my comfort zone, and I reign you in." It was how it had usually worked when they were younger, and Aaron had always felt good that Dave _let_ Aaron reign him in, even when Aaron had been fairly new to the Bureau. It spoke volumes about how much trust Dave put in him, and Aaron supposed it was why they worked so well together even now that Aaron was technically Dave's boss. Aaron looked away again. "I clean up your messes, and you clean up mine." He shrugged and squinted at the sun.

"You're the only one who ever could," Dave said. "God, I'm getting maudlin." He stood up to keep himself from doing or saying something wrong. He kept thinking he must be utterly transparent to Aaron. History, after all, could be a burden as well as a blessing.

"I promise not to tell anyone," Aaron said softly.

Dave glanced down at him, knowing he should say something flippant, something to direct this conversation out of the deep waters it had suddenly veered into. But no words came, and he just smiled, watching him.

Aaron held Dave's gaze for a long moment, and then pushed off the step he was sitting on. "You said at breakfast that if you had anything to say about it, I wouldn't go to work tomorrow either," he said, not sure why he was just realizing this. "Are you planning on staying over another night to do that?"

The words sent a thrill through Dave, but he just shrugged. "That an invitation?" His smile warmed.

Aaron breathed a small laugh. "You never needed one."

Dave laughed, too. "No, I just barged into your life without waiting for permission, let alone an invitation, didn't I?" he said. He turned and headed for the trail, not sure why he was so confident Aaron would follow. Aaron wasn't a follower these days, he was a leader. But out here, just them, there was no need for either of them to prove anything.

Aaron started down the trail behind Dave, grinning. "Oh, but you did it with such panache. Honestly, you're quite irresistible." He hadn't really meant to say that last part, and he looked down at the ground as they walked. It was the truth, but he didn't need to let himself fall into flirting with Dave, no matter how easy it was to do.

"I don't know, you seemed to manage it all right," Dave said, and instantly regretted it. He had never spent much time being angry about the way things happened; he'd been lucky to have even a few weeks with Aaron, considering the man was as good as married when he showed up, and one of his defining characteristics was loyalty. Dave cleared his throat. "Sorry."

That stopped Aaron in his tracks and he looked up and watched Dave for a moment until Dave turned around. He was surprised by the subtle underpinnings of hurt in Dave's voice--it felt strange to rehash this when Aaron thought it was all long past. It felt strange to think he should feel guilty about how things had ended ten years ago when they had both agreed it was for the best. But he _did_ suddenly feel a little guilty for reasons he couldn't pin down, and he suddenly didn't feel quite so relaxed anymore. "What else was I supposed to have done, Dave?"

Dave sighed and shook his head. "Nothing, Aaron. That...I shouldn't have said that." He forced himself to meet Aaron's gaze. "I never blamed you."

"But you're still hurt," Aaron said, not really know why he was pushing. Maybe it was out of habit; he was so used to pushing people for information. But maybe they really did need to talk about this.

Dave's heart thumped harder in his chest. Hell, yeah, he was still hurt, but whose fault was it? Not Aaron's. Maybe not even Haley's. It was just one of those stupid things that happened. He licked his lips and shrugged, looking away. "I've always regretted the way things happened," he said finally. "But it wasn't your fault."

Aaron nodded and started walking again after a moment. "I would have done things differently if I knew then what I know now," he said quietly.

Dave swallowed. "That's easy to say, but you have a beautiful son that you wouldn't have without her. And you were happy, Aaron. Even if she did eventually hurt you again." There was a brief silence as they walked. "None of us are perfect. It's in our nature to disappoint each other." He glanced over at Aaron with a faint smile on his face. "I, apparently, am an expert at it."

"I'm not denying that I was happy for... a long time, or that there's not a single thing I regret about Jack, other than that I don't see him nearly enough." Aaron sighed and looked out along the trail. "I just..." He shrugged. He tried to think of how to put what he was thinking in a way that sounded neither bitter, hurt, or unfair. "I over-estimated her."

Dave was having a hard time paying attention to where he was walking, because he didn't want to look away from Aaron. He put his hands in his pockets, slowing his stride a little. "I feel like I ought to say something profound or helpful, but...Well, I've left three unhappy women in my past. I don't think I have any room to judge." _Of course, I know how I failed the last two._

Aaron sighed, his frown deepening. "I just thought she understood--the job, me..." He shrugged and watched the ground as he walked. "And I thought we were alike, and I'm not sure now where that changed, or if it was ever even true."

"Sometimes people change. Their priorities, their feelings change." Aaron looked sort of forlorn, and Dave felt that old urge to hug him and promise things would be all right. "I guess maybe that's what happened with Haley."

"Priorities and feelings change, yes, but loyalties shouldn't," Aaron said, and then didn't really want to talk about it anymore. He looked out over the landscape and avoided the gaze he could feel on him.

Dave's brows drew together. "Aaron, what happened?" he asked softly. He had a feeling Aaron wouldn't answer him, but he had to ask.

Aaron shook his head and kept walking, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep from doing anything that would betray his sudden discomfort. He was silent for a long time, and too his credit, Dave didn't push. Finally, Aaron drew a long breath and forced himself to speak. He obviously needed to talk about this, and he couldn't think of a single other person he felt close enough to to tell. "Years ago, when you and I... I really believed she would have never done the same thing," he started.

"The same thing," Dave repeated, trying to figure out what Aaron meant. "You...don't think she could be attracted to someone else while she was with you?" Frankly, Dave couldn't understand that, either.

Aaron turned and gave Dave a look, and then turned back around. _More than that_. "I don't know how long it's been going on, but I'm fairly certain it started before the word 'divorce' was ever actually spoken by either of us."

"God, Aaron. She was actually seeing someone else?" Dave shook his head and looked away, trying to hide his sudden anger. How _could_ she? Dave might be a jackass in a lot of ways, but he'd never been unfaithful. Yes, he'd married Rita before he was over Aaron, and he'd failed Doris and Kay in other ways, but he'd never even considered cheating on them. Then he drew in a slow breath as another realization hit him. "Aaron, you and I...what we did wasn't wrong. You thought she had walked away."

"I know," Aaron said, and he did know that. "But it still felt like a betrayal then. And now..." He shook his head. "She sat there and told me she loved me and tried to get me to leave my job, all while sleeping with another man." He shook his head, wondering how it could feel so good to say something out loud even when it also felt so awful. "And I know that I have no one to blame but myself."

Dave stopped walking, trying to find the words. "She tried again to get you to leave the BAU? I thought she'd..." He trailed off and sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't have let you go so easily." He shook his head. "God, I'm so...I hate that she put you through this, Aaron." He ignored for the moment the suggestion that it had been Aaron's fault.

Aaron laughed softly, but it didn't sound overly amused. "Can't change the past, can we?" Aaron considered telling Dave that Haley had called his suspension a blessing in disguise, but Dave already understood, and Dave had never gotten along with Strauss. There was no use in having him know that she had ever had anything out for Aaron. He shook his head. "Not your fault."

"I think we've had this conversation before, too," Dave said mildly. "It may not be my fault, but I hate to see you hurting. You deserve better treatment than that." After a moment he started walking again. He had a feeling Aaron needed to talk about this--Aaron probably hadn't told anyone about this, after all--but he was tempted to change the subject, try to lighten the hurt in Aaron's expression.

"And she deserved more than what I gave her," Aaron said, then smiled sadly. "This conversation could become very circular."

"She knew who you were when she married you," Dave replied. He sighed. "Sorry, Hotshot. Maybe I'm a little protective of my partner."

"I changed," Aaron said, and then shook his head and laughed softly. "And so did the BAU. No partners on a team," he said and smiled at Dave, then reached out and pressed the back of his hand to Dave's arm, hoping Dave would understand it as the silent 'thank you' Aaron meant the gesture to be.


	6. Chapter 6

The next few cases came and went in a whirl of emotion--stressful beyond the usual when one of their own was shot. Dave was by Aaron's side during their unofficial investigation into who shot Garcia, which ended in JJ having to take a life. It had been an incredible shot, nearly unbelievable, and the case had left the team shaken, but not broken. Perhaps closer than they had been before, and on a team like theirs that practically spent their lives together, that was saying quite a lot. Even Dave was starting to blend, to care in ways Aaron knew he eventually would grow to care, no matter what Dave actually _said_.

Then there had been the case in LA with Johnny McHale, and that one had been difficult for them all, since McHale had been truly unaware of his own behavior. And after LA had been Fredericksburg. Aaron knew Dave had felt a certain kinship with the retired police detective there, the way he had held on to the one case he'd never solved. It made Aaron think of the 'unfinished business' that had brought Dave back to the BAU. He'd never told Aaron what it was, but after Fredericksburg, Aaron thought it had something to do with a case Dave hadn't solved his first time around. He made a mental note to look into Dave's old cases, but as soon as they got back to the BAU, it was driven out of his mind by more pressing matters.

Dave was relieved when Morgan and Prentiss suggested they go out for drinks after they got back from the case in Fredericksburg. He liked the members of this team, liked the way they worked together and how everyone contributed different strengths to their cases. He agreed immediately, and was amused at the way Morgan ordered Reid to join them.

He was pleased when Aaron actually agreed to join the rest of them--and then things went wrong. It was painful to stand there and not be able to stop Prentiss from asking what the papers were; Dave knew for sure then that Aaron hadn't told anyone else, because he was the only one who'd recognized them the moment they walked in. Youngsters. What did they know about divorce? He clenched his jaw as Aaron explained tersely that Haley was filing for divorce and strode out of the BAU. Dave waved off everyone's questions and went after him.

He caught up in the parking lot. "Aaron."

Aaron drew a long breath and held back his first response; he wanted to snap, wanted to yell at someone, but this wasn't Dave's fault. Dave was just trying to be a good friend. "Yeah?" he said, not looking up from where he was opening his car door.

Dave went and leaned against the car, not looking directly at Aaron. "Come over to my place. We can drink and not talk, but I'm not letting you go home alone."

Aaron sighed and looked up as he opened the door and tossed the envelope with his divorce papers carelessly into the passenger seat. "Dave..." he started, and then forced the exasperation out of his voice. "I don't need a sitter. I'm fine."

"No, you don't a sitter. You need a friend. And you need to be reminded there are people who--care about you." Dave tried to say 'love', but frankly couldn't force the word out. Not to mention he didn't want to throw that word out in a situation like this. "I can understand not wanting to deal with the whole team, but this is just me and Shithead here." He tried to smile. "Shithead makes everything seem a little better."

"The cat probably doesn't remember me and likely won't take to me so well anymore," Aaron said, giving Dave an imploring look.

"Shithead loved you," Dave said. "You were always good for cuddles." Why was it easier to talk about the damn cat's emotions than his own? He shook his head. "Come on. Don't make me use my handcuffs."

Aaron stared at Dave for a long moment, and then a smile formed on his lips in spite of himself, even if he knew it probably looked a little sickly. "Cuddles?"

"What? I'm talking about _Shithead_ ," Dave muttered. He glanced sideways at Aaron.

"I never _cuddled_ your cat," Aaron said.

"Shut up."

Aaron glanced away, the smile on his lips weakening a bit. He felt too tired to argue, and considering Dave had even managed to coax a smile from him was a good sign. He shook his head. "Where are you living now?"

"Come get in the truck. We'll swing by and get your car tomorrow." 

Aaron nodded after a moment's thought, and followed Dave to the truck.

When they got to Dave's apartment, he opened the door slowly out of habit, then remembered Mucci was with Doris now. As soon as Shithead heard his keys jingling, though, he came running in, tail straight up in the air. He paused when he saw Aaron, then cautiously crossed the distance to sniff at his pant leg.

Aaron looked down at the cat and he couldn't not think about the last time he'd really seen it, standing in Dave's living room when Haley had come back and Dave had tried to leave the BAU. Now he was in a different apartment of Dave's in the exact opposite set of circumstances: Dave was back at the BAU and Haley was _leaving_ Aaron. "Hello, cat," he murmured, trying to ignore the surge of emotion he was feeling.

Shithead purred and rubbed against him, leaving hair on his suit pants. Dave just smiled. "There, see, he remembers you." He headed for the kitchen. "Make yourself comfortable, I'll be right back with the scotch."

Aaron watched Dave go. "The head butting is just him marking me as his territory, not him remembering me," he called after Dave, but when Aaron went to sit on the couch, the cat jumped up in Aaron's lap. Aaron raised his eyebrow at it.

"I can't believe you're profiling my cat," Dave called back. He got the bottle of Glenfiddich and two glasses, then returned to the living room, where he found Shithead on Aaron's lap. "Anyway, you ought to be glad he's calling you his territory and not food." He sat on the couch near Aaron and poured them both a glass.

"To his credit, he's never once tried to eat me." Aaron took the glass and took a drink, enjoying the burn of it down his throat. He didn't drink often, and usually not the harder stuff, but tonight it felt appropriate.

"Like I said." Dave glanced over at him. "I think Shithead likes you almost more than he likes me." The thought flitted through his head that last time Haley had left, Aaron and Dave ended up in bed together. He tried to push it away. He hadn't liked the way things ended that time. And while he knew Aaron wouldn't be taking her back a third time, he wasn't sure if sex was really the best way to handle this situation.

"Maybe he prefers being called 'cat' over both Mr. Fluffy and 'Shithead'". The cat curled up in Aaron's lap and Aaron almost rolled his eyes. The damn cat _did_ remember him, apparently. And Aaron was going to have to dry clean this suit. He lifted his hand to pet it and took another drink. "And maybe I did cuddle him once or twice when you weren't home," he joked, not quite managing the tone.

Dave laughed faintly and took a sip of his drink. Shithead was better therapy than anything Dave could say. After a moment he turned his head to look at Aaron, trying to assess his emotional state. He just got distracted by Aaron's eyelashes and the lost expression Aaron was trying to hide. God, he was gorgeous.

The longer the silence drew on, the more and more Aaron's chest ached. He'd been doing a good job ignoring it as long as he kept talking, but when he was forced to actually think, to sit there in his own head... it was difficult to manage. "Say something," he murmured after what felt like too long.

Dave sighed, wishing he had something wise or even witty to say. "I like having you in my life again." He looked down at Aaron's hand resting on Shithead's fur.

Aaron drew a deep breath, and then nodded. "I missed you too." Aaron squashed the fleeting impulse to move closer to Dave. The last time Haley left him, Aaron had pulled Dave into his hotel bed. It wouldn't be fair to do that to Dave again, or even reasonable to think Dave might want that again.

"Listen, whatever happens, no matter what, I'm here, Aaron." Dave was trying to resist the temptation to suggest a good hard fuck. They'd still only danced around the topic of their past relationship. And he'd got his papers tonight. Still, what did papers mean? Aaron had known it was coming. He had an empty house to prove it. Dave took a breath. "Anything you need, if I can help you, I will."

Aaron sucked in a breath, remembering that Dave had said very similar things the night Aaron pulled Dave into his bed the first time, a little thrill going through him that Aaron knew he most definitely shouldn't be feeling. "I know," he murmured, and reached out to close his hand around Dave's on the couch, because it was a safe enough gesture.

Dave's breath caught in his throat for a moment when Aaron's hand touched his. He turned his hand so he could grasp Aaron's back. He suddenly had no idea what to say, so he stared at their joined hands and didn't say anything.

"Thank you," Aaron whispered.

Dave swallowed. "Welcome. I'm glad if I can help." The heat of Aaron's hand in his was making it hard to think.

Aaron drew his thumb along the top of Dave's hand, then gave it a squeeze and let go, forcing himself not to think about what he was thinking about. It wouldn't solve anything to do things the way they had last time.

Dave's throat felt tight. He swallowed again, trying to get rid of the feeling. "Aaron..." he murmured, but words still didn't want to come. He supposed pulling Aaron into his arms wouldn't make things any clearer.

Aaron didn't answer at first, mostly because the tone of Dave's voice made him wonder if Dave was thinking the same thing. Or maybe it meant that Dave knew what _Aaron_ was thinking about, and that was an entirely unsettling thought. "What?" he asked softly.

Dave shook his head. "I don't know. I don't know what to say right now...how to say what..." He just shrugged. This couldn't be the right time to ask Aaron to give them another shot at a relationship. It had to be too soon, in Aaron's mind, at least, even if not in Dave's.

Aaron turned his hand and gave the cat a scratch under his chin, just letting Dave talk. It wasn't often Dave admitted to not knowing what to say, or _how_ to say something. Normally Dave just _said_ things and then dealt with the consequences later. After a moment, Aaron ducked his head to talk to the cat, "I think he's malfunctioned."

Dave scowled at Aaron, though there was no heat to it. "Go away, Shithead."

Aaron smiled faintly and looked up at Dave. "There's no need for name calling," he murmured, holding Dave's gaze.

Dave's scowl faded at the expression on Aaron's face. "Some things haven't changed, Aaron," he said finally. His body felt like it was trying to strangle him, though whether it was because he was afraid of saying the wrong thing, or afraid of saying anything at all, he wasn't sure.

"I was beginning to get the feeling," Aaron said. He looked down at the strip of couch between them, then back at the cat. "Dave... I'm not sure this... is the time," he said.

"I know," Dave said. His voice came out a little choked, which was highly embarrassing. He sighed. "It's why I wasn't...didn't know...God, Aaron." He looked away, because his eyes were stinging suddenly, which was even more embarrassing. He shouldn't have said anything. But Aaron had touched him first.

Aaron's gaze snapped back up to Dave, and Dave wasn't looking at him. But Aaron had never heard him sound like that before, and he didn't have a clue what to do about it. "I'm not... feeling..." _Especially strong right now_ , he thought, but couldn't manage the words. He reached up and cupped the opposite side of Dave's jaw. "What I did to you last time... It wasn't fair."

Dave closed his eyes and lifted one hand to cover Aaron's. "You didn't do anything to me. It took two of us for that." He took a deep breath and pulled Aaron's hand down from his face, but didn't let go of it. "But I know the timing of this is shit."

"The timing was shit last time too." Aaron stroked a thumb over Dave's hand. He sighed. "I used you to fill a void in my life, and it doesn't matter that I liked you, or that I cared about you deeply, it was what I did." He squeezed Dave's hand. "Care about you; present tense."

"Yeah, well." Dave wasn't sure if he felt better or worse. "That's why I wasn't malfunctioning. I had good reason for not knowing what to say." He sighed and reached down to gently nudge Shithead off Aaron's lap. "Come here," he ordered, holding out his arms.

Aaron stared at Dave for a moment, but then shifted into Dave's arms, leaning against his chest. It felt good. Strange in the way it always had felt to let another man hold him like this--not that he'd ever let any other man but Dave--but it felt good too. Aaron needed it, whether he would have admitted to that or not. "I've never been alone," he said after a while. "I went straight from my parents to a dorm room to Haley, and you were there when we were separated." He sighed, and forced the words he was thinking out before he could make himself keep them inside, feeling his chest tighten painfully. "I think I should be alone... for a while. I think I need to know what that's like and know what that means. I don't... think it's healthy to not know who I am without another person in my life... And if we still want this later, I want to be able to give you everything I didn't before, and... I can't do that right now." He suddenly felt like he couldn't breathe, not just because he wanted Dave _now_ , but because he never imagined being able to say all of that to _anyone_.

Dave stroked his fingers through Aaron's hair and sighed. "Yeah," he said finally, closing his eyes. He didn't like it, but he did understand. And he knew Aaron was right. It just wasn't easy. Then again, nothing in life ever was. He tightened his arms around Aaron and hoped he wouldn't pull away yet.

Aaron closed his eyes at the touch and sighed, then slid his arms around Dave's waist. "That doesn't mean we have to stop this... unless it bothers you... to touch without more."

"I told you," Dave said quietly. "I just want to give you what you need right now. So whatever you need from me..." He trailed off.

"What I want and what I need are very different things, and this is... what I want." Aaron was so tempted to press his face to Dave's neck, but he didn't move. "I don't trust anything I want right now."

Dave sighed and turned his head to press his lips to Aaron's forehead. "I've felt this way for thirteen years," he said after a few moments. "I don't think it's going to go away while you find yourself."

Aaron opened his eyes, and took a deep breath, then pulled away to look at Dave, though he didn't move out of Dave's arms. "Dave, we were together a few weeks and you've been married twice since then," he said, smiling faintly.

Dave looked away from the expression on Aaron's face. Maybe he'd never known how much Dave cared. Maybe that was Dave's fault. Then again, maybe that was for the best. "Rita was me trying to get over you. Doris was me thinking I had. Can we move on?"

Aaron stared at Dave for a moment, the smile slowly fading off his face, and then he sat back. Dave loved him--had loved him for _over a decade_. Aaron had realized a long time ago that he had loved Dave too, but all Aaron could feel now was even more guilt. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and then rubbed his eyes. "Dave..." he murmured, then just shook his head.

Dave leaned forward and reached for the bottle to refill his glass. "Pity is not what I was looking for there," he said, an edge creeping into his voice. He glared at the scotch and drained it in a long swallow.

"I'm not pitying you," Aaron said quickly, not failing to notice Dave's sudden change in demeanor. He shook his head again. "Not enough to be responsible for one divorce. Now I am for three." He glanced at his own glass and then drew a breath. "Maybe I should go."

"Damn it, Aaron, you don't get responsibility for how I fucked up my life," Dave said. "I made all my own choices." He wasn't entirely sure why he was so angry, except that he knew he shouldn't have dredged up the past, not yet, not tonight. And he certainly hadn't expected Aaron to react like this when Dave finally revealed how he felt.

"Yeah, and so did I. And, apparently, I made the wrong ones," Aaron said, and he hadn't meant it quite the way it had come out--he'd meant that hurting Dave, making Dave's life more difficult, was the last thing Aaron had ever wanted, and that it was even more painful to Aaron to know that the hurt he inflicted had lasted so long--but there was no retracting his words now.

Dave moved further away from Aaron and stared at him. "Well pardon me for complicating your life," he bit out, stung. "Maybe I should have made it simpler by pointing out that Haley was a manipulative liar from the moment I met her!" Oh, shit, he really shouldn't have said that.

That shocked Aaron into silence for a moment, but then his temper flared. "Fuck you," he spat, and he turned to glare at Dave before he even had an opportunity to check his anger. He didn't waste another minute getting up and starting towards the door though.

"That's what started this whole fucking mess, isn't it?" Dave snapped back, standing up and following Aaron. "Don't you walk out on me, Aaron!"

"Or what?" Aaron growled, not turning around or slowing his stride.

It was a good question, and it should have stopped Dave in his tracks. What _could_ he do? Nothing. Unfortunately he spoke before thinking. "I didn't have to come back, you know! I apparently don't have any reason to stay!"

Aaron stopped, and then turned to glare at Dave. "You're threatening to run away from me again?" he accused. "How's running away worked out for you, Dave? You've left, what, two successful careers, three marriages; you've spent the last several years of your life moving from town to town, seminar to seminar, person to person, and when it gets too hard, you leave." he said, and turned around again. "Learn a new act." _God_ if Dave _did_ leave, Aaron was never going to forgive himself, but right now he was too angry to care.

That _did_ stop Dave in his tracks. He stared at Aaron's back, mouth hanging open as he fumbled for words that wouldn't come. Finally he snapped, "So what, you're going to give it a try tonight? Think it'll work any better for you? What is it you're running from here?"

" _I'm_ not running," Aaron said, turning to fix Dave with another sharp glare. "I'm leaving before we say anything else we're going to regret. I nearly lost you once, and I won't do it again, unless you're planning on just not showing up tomorrow, in which case I'm _not_ running after you again."

" _Nearly lost me_?" Dave repeated incredulously. "You _married_ someone else, Aaron!" He closed his mouth then, his teeth clicking together, and stared at Aaron, breathing hard. "Fuck it," he muttered finally, and lunged forward, grabbing Aaron's shoulders and kissing him angrily.

Aaron made a startled noise, and resisted for a moment, but then started kissing Dave back with as much heat as Dave was giving. "You _told_ me to marry her," he whispered, his tone still heated even as he bit at Dave's lips and started pulling open Dave's buttons with shaky fingers--shaking from anger or desire, he wasn't sure.

Dave pulled Aaron's tie off and pushed him back toward the wall. "What was I supposed to do, beg you not to leave me?" His heart was thumping madly in his chest as he nipped at Aaron's jaw.

"You can't blame me for something you never gave me a voice in," Aaron argued. He bared Dave's chest and ran his hands up it. "This is a terrible idea," he said, but his body was already responding, and he pulled Dave against him.

"This is the best damn idea we've had in weeks," Dave muttered, tugging the back of Aaron's shirt out of his pants to get to bare skin. "God, Aaron, couldn't you have tried a little harder to change my mind?" he whispered, and kissed him hard, one hand sliding up into his hair.

"Would you have listened?" Aaron countered, sliding his fingertips into the back of Dave's pants.

Dave closed his eyes and kissed Aaron's neck, then nipped. "Maybe. Shit, I don't know. I wanted to." He shoved Aaron back against the wall and started working on Aaron's buttons.

Aaron made a noise that was almost a laugh, but he couldn't really catch his breath. "You are such an asshole." He tugged at the back of Dave's shirt to get Dave to let it drop off.

"You've known that for thirteen years," Dave muttered, shrugging his shoulders and then flailing an arm impatiently to get his shirt off. "And you're an uptight hardass sometimes." He kissed Aaron again, pressing their chests together.

Aaron hummed into the kiss, then started pushing Dave back, nudging him gently, but firmly, towards the hallway. "You need that. You're reckless, and impatient, and... I still think this is a really bad idea," he said, kissing Dave again, his teeth scraping Dave's lower lip as his fingers curled into the top of Dave's pants.

"Maybe I do need that," Dave retorted when the kiss ended. "And maybe you need a good hard fuck to loosen you up." He found the hallway wall convenient to push Aaron against again, and worked a hand between them to undo Aaron's belt as they kissed.

The words Dave spoke sent a thrill through Hotch that went straight to his cock. He made a little noise of want, then threaded his fingers into Dave's hair, curling them tightly in the graying locks as he deepened their kiss. "I'm loose," he breathed.

Dave snorted. "Bullshit. You're a fucking drill sergeant." He bit at Aaron's jaw. "Driving everyone crazy."

Aaron turned them both and shoved Dave back against the wall. He kissed Dave hard and yanked at Dave's pants, pulling them open. "Keep going, and I won't be the one getting fucked."

"Always got to be in control, don't you?" Dave gasped, tangling his fingers in Aaron's hair--it was too short; Dave didn't know what had possessed Aaron to mangle it in this haircut. He bucked his hips against Aaron's, but it was only to provoke Aaron, not to really struggle.

Aaron drew in a shaky breath and then pushed against Dave's hips, pinning them back against the wall in immediate reaction to both the jolt of anger and the jolt of arousal that flooded Aaron at Dave's movement against him and at Dave's words. God, they really shouldn't do this. Not like this, not angry, not fighting. And Aaron _was_ still angry; his heart was pounding against his chest. He pressed his head to Dave's shoulder, panting hard. "Maybe," he breathed. "Maybe I just haven't had enough."

"Enough what?" Dave demanded, confused. Aaron wasn't responding the way he'd expected, going still like that, and his words didn't make any sense. Dave slid his hand down just inside the back of Aaron's pants.

"Control," Aaron said, his voice shaky. He reached back and pulled Dave's hand away, and then stepped back, leaning against the wall and starting to pull his pants closed again.

"What the hell?" Dave glared at him. "You need to learn to _give up_ a little control every once in a while!" He didn't move from where he was standing against the wall, but his shoulders slumped a little as he watched Aaron start re-dressing himself.

"Do I?" Aaron said, looking up and glaring back at Dave. "I slept with you the first time in a moment of weakness. I went back to Haley because you wouldn't even _let_ me think about the other possibility. With the exception of my career, I've let Haley call every shot in our personal lives--hell, Dave, I even put in for a transfer last year because of her, when it was the last thing I wanted!" He started to pull his shirt closed too. "And now I'm letting you drag me down the hallway when this isn't a good idea?" He shook his head and walked back toward the living room. "Where's my tie?"

Dave ran a hand over his face. "I can't believe you're doing this," he muttered, leaning his head back against the wall. After several deep breaths, he made himself follow Aaron. "Probably on the floor by the door," he said, though he could see Aaron was already leaning down to get it. Oddly, the sight fanned his anger again. "And for the record, _you're_ the one who started for the bedroom first," he snapped. "So you can't blame this all on me."

"I didn't say I was," Aaron called back angrily, not liking the tone of Dave's voice. Of course, Dave _had_ kissed Aaron first, but that seemed like a childish argument. "I'm doing the right thing, what I should have done earlier."

"You're leaving," Dave said, his voice flat. He sighed. "Well, you're not going to get far, because you rode with me, remember?"

Aaron froze, and then turned to look at Dave. _Shit_. He'd completely forgotten that. He shook his head. "I'll call a cab," he muttered.

"Don't be such a jackass," Dave said, buttoning his pants. "I'll take you back to Quantico." He rubbed his hands over his face again and went looking for his shirt.

"No, really, it's not a problem," Aaron murmured.

"Aaron. God. No matter what, we're still partners," Dave said. He didn't want the evening to end like this. He was still angry that Aaron was leaving with this unresolved, but he could understand why.

Aaron sighed and slumped back against the wall, shoving his tie in his pocket instead of putting it back on. "We're not _partners_ , Dave."

Dave shook his head. "We've been partners for thirteen years, Aaron. That doesn't go away just because I quit the Bureau or because you decided to start people working as a team."

"I didn't decide that," Aaron said, but the fight had all but gone out of his voice completely, and suddenly he was just tired.

"Just...shut up, Aaron," Dave said. He got his keys off the kitchen counter and looked at Aaron.

Aaron rolled his eyes and looked at Dave, but didn't speak. He wasn't even sure what to say. After a moment, he just turned and pulled the door open, then walked out the front door.

The drive back to the BAU was silent. Dave didn't know what to say, and Aaron was apparently taking him literally. When they pulled up next to Aaron's car, Dave put his truck in gear and leaned on the steering wheel. "Aaron..."

Aaron had been staring silently out the window. The night had gone from good, to awful, to comfortable, then back to awful again. Aaron felt drained and oddly empty, and maybe it had been a good thing for them to yell at each other, but Aaron wasn't really sure of that just yet. "Yeah?" he asked softly, not looking over.

Dave shook his head and looked over at him. "I don't know. Just..." He licked his lips and lifted one hand to touch Aaron's shoulder briefly. "See you later."

Aaron turned towards Dave, but still didn't look at him, then nodded. "Yeah." He wanted to touch Dave's hand, but after a moment, he just got out of the car and started towards his own.

Dave didn't move until Aaron's tail-lights had faded. Then he put his truck back in gear and headed for home.


	7. Chapter 7

Dave woke up depressed and hung over. He'd returned home the night before and had quite a bit more scotch before going to bed, and he hadn't slept well. He kept dreaming about arguments, not just with Aaron but with Rita and Doris, even one memorable argument with his father.

"God," Dave muttered, and rubbed a hand over his face. After a long time he rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling, wishing he'd exerted a little more self-control last night. He shouldn't have let Aaron know how he felt. He shouldn't have let things stray towards the past at all. He finally dragged himself out of bed.

Shithead was sitting by the door, sniffing at the carpet. "I hope you didn't forget where the litter box is," Dave told him, and went to fix himself some coffee.

His spirits were still low when he arrived at the BAU an hour later, and he went to his office without even glancing into Aaron's to see if he was there.

Aaron saw Dave walk past the window of his office on time, as usual, and a sick feeling washed through Aaron's body. He'd woken up in the middle of the night cold, shivering. He hadn't had a nightmare in a long time, and when he stirred, he reached for Haley--and then as soon as he realized, as soon as he remembered, he curled his hand into a fist and and gave the pillow next to his a sound thump before slumping back into bed. Where his thoughts promptly went back to Dave and everything that had happened the night before. He'd meant it when he told Dave he wasn't ready for more, but... it was _Dave_. And Dave _loved_ him.

Leaving might have been the worst thing Aaron could have done last night, but he hadn't been able to force himself to stay.

When JJ called the team into the conference room later, Aaron went, and did his best to ignore the way his stomach was turning. They still had a job to do, and Aaron was fairly certain that no matter what had happen, Dave still knew that as much as Aaron did.

Dave forced himself to look at Aaron only because he knew that the others would notice if he didn't. The team took for granted that he and Aaron were close, and he'd appreciated that both because it allowed them to spend time together without the others questioning it, and because it meant they didn't ask Aaron personal questions about him. Now it just seemed like another way these men and women would realize something was wrong. He forced himself to listen as JJ told them about the missing girls, and that the jet was already standing by. He caught a ride to the tarmac with Emily and Derek and told himself that he and Aaron had long since proven they could work together without personal matters getting in the way.

He occupied himself on the flight out with a novel, and no one broke into his privacy except Reid, once, when he gave Dave an update from Garcia, who told them one of the girls had been found, her body unidentifiable.

Of course it was inevitable that when they got to the scene, Dave and Aaron fell together in dealing with the police and the parents of the victims.

Still, the case went off easy. Well, easy in the sense that Dave and Aaron were able to deal with each other professionally. Once Aaron was in work mode, he'd hardly blinked, and when the case ended with Reid standing over a young man who'd just been shot point-blank in the face, his killer likely to walk free, Aaron was too angry to think of anything else when he'd gotten on the jet. He settled in right across from Dave's seat out of habit, preoccupied, and flipped open the case file.

Dave looked up slowly from the report he'd been filling out. His eyebrows went up as he registered that Aaron had just voluntarily sat down across from him. Usually the flight home was unwinding time, he'd discovered. It seemed maybe this time that wasn't going to be the case. He pushed away the pang of hurt and loneliness that followed, just as he'd been pushing it away the whole weekend. It had been a hell of a lot easier when they were working, because at least when they were working together, he had a part of Aaron. Dave didn't say anything. If Aaron was going to sit with him, Aaron could damn well say something first.

Aaron saw the movement across from him, and glanced up... and then it hit him too late why he probably should have sat on the other end of the jet. Aaron glanced at Reid, who was asleep, then back at his file. "Vaughan is going to walk," he murmured, just to fill the silence.

"Big surprise," Dave said, and looked back down at his report. "They obviously really want the guys he worked for."

"He..." Aaron shook his head. He focused on his paperwork for a moment, but he couldn't think or concentrate at all, and after a moment he sighed and looked back at the rest of the team again. JJ and Emily were having a quiet conversation on the far end of the plane, and the rest of the team was sleeping. Aaron cleared his throat. "We need to talk," he murmured.

"You think?" Dave didn't look up. What was there to say? Aaron had said he wasn't ready for anything, and Dave had provoked him, and they'd shouted at each other. It actually almost felt good to drop the professionalism and be angry about it again. It'd be nice, though, if Dave knew whether he was angrier at Aaron or at himself.

" _Dave_..." Aaron said, looking up and giving Dave a look.

Dave glanced up at him again, and was struck by how tired Aaron looked. "I'm listening."

Aaron stared at Dave for a moment, then shook his head. "We'll talk when you decide you can speak to me without using that tone."

"Don't you fucking patronize me," Dave growled, glaring at him.

Aaron sucked in a sharp breath and looked away, shifting in his seat. He clenched his jaw. This was _not_ where this needed to happen. After a moment, he got his reaction under control and simply ignored Dave's words, looking back at the papers in front of him.

Dave glanced away, taking in the rest of the team. Morgan had shifted in his sleep and was leaning on Reid. It was sort of cute. Emily and JJ were leaning in over the table between them, looking at something. He sighed and looked back at Aaron. "Sorry, that was...well, look, don't patronize me, okay? I'm a big boy, so whatever it is you have to say, just say it." His voice was low, but the anger was gone.

"I wasn't patronizing you," Aaron said, the calm in his voice forced. "I don't think this is the place for this." He licked his lips and looked up again. "I'll buy you dinner." He really hoped that didn't sound like he thought that was going to make up for anything.

Dave didn't really want to talk about it at all, but he knew they had to deal with it. He glanced out the window, then shrugged. "Fine. You can buy me dinner. I'm in the mood for steak."

Aaron looked back up, almost-- _almost_ \--surprised by that. But then this _was_ Dave. "Do you remember what I called you the other night?" he whispered. "You never fail to disappoint." He sighed. "Fine, steak."

"I've never denied that," Dave said, meeting his gaze. "You never seemed to mind."

Aaron looked at Dave for a long moment, and the worst part of it was knowing that usually Aaron didn't mind. Usually he liked Dave's demeanor when it wasn't directly a problem professionally. Aaron couldn't deny it either, so he looked back down at his files. "I'll meet you in my office after you're finished with your paperwork."

Dave glanced over at Morgan and Reid again--still asleep. "Right." He turned his attention back on his paperwork. Eventually he quit writing and just stared out the window until his eyelids got heavy and he fell into a light doze. He didn't wake until Morgan touched his shoulder. They were about to land. Aaron was up front discussing something with JJ.

Once they were back at the BAU, Dave settled in at his desk and finished his paperwork as quickly as he could, then just sat at his desk for a long time, wishing he could make some sort of sense of all the conflicting thoughts and emotions.

Finally he shoved away from his desk and made his way slowly to Aaron's office, telling himself he wasn't reluctant. The bullpen was empty except for Prentiss, who was packing up her bag and obviously getting ready to head out. Dave paused outside Aaron's office for a moment, looking in the window. Then he went to the door and knocked lightly.

"Come in," Aaron answered, not sounding very happy, and when he glanced up and say Dave, he sat back from his desk. "Hey," he said, his tone gentling. He'd had a bit of time to calm down, and he was really hoping both of them could stay that way.

"Hi." Dave put his hands in his pockets and leaned against the door frame. "Need more time?" He wasn't sure if he hoped Aaron would say yes or no. They shouldn't put off this conversation any longer, but he had a feeling he wasn't really going to like what Aaron had to say.

Aaron shook his head. They might as well get this over with. "No," he said, pushing out of his chair. "Do you really want steak?" he asked, and then his chest tightened because normally that question might have been accompanied by a smile.

"Yeah," Dave said, watching Aaron and trying to gauge his mood. "Steak and a nice Barolo vintage, or maybe a Barbaresco. If we're going to discuss this over dinner, it ought to be a nice dinner."

Hotch laughed unhappily and smiled a not entirely amused smile. "Whatever you want."

Dave nodded. "There's a good Italian place in Stafford. Quiet but not too pricey, and the food's excellent." Aaron was obviously uncomfortable, but Dave wasn't sure what to do about it. He wasn't exactly comfortable himself.

Aaron nodded, and gave Prentiss a small wave as he headed out of the BAU. The team hadn't really been questioning him much since he'd been served in front of them, and they all probably thought Dave was just keeping him company. Aaron hated that they all probably knew he needed it. He walked into the elevator and glanced at Dave, not sure what to say.

Dave was watching the numbers, but he caught Aaron's glance from the corner of his eye. He turned his head to look over at him. He wanted to say something that would wipe away the tense lines on Aaron's face. Unfortunately anything he could think to say would probably just make it worse. He put his hands in his pockets and looked back at the elevator doors. "It's not Doctor Reid's fault that guy pulled the trigger," he said finally. Talking about work was safe.

Aaron looked at Dave for a moment, then looked away. He could do small talk. Small talk with Dave was easy, even when Aaron's mind was elsewhere. "We all know that better that Reid, unfortunately."

"You'll talk to him? He's got a fantastic mind, and I like him a great deal...but it's just possible that he models his standards for himself after you." Dave glanced at Aaron again. "I like you a great deal, too, but you've always held yourself to higher standards than other people."

Aaron drew a breath and shook his head. "I have to," he said as fact. "If anything, Reid is more Gideon's than mine." He frowned in thought. "Yeah, I'll talk to him."

_Poor Reid_ , Dave thought, but didn't say. "Well, you're all he has, now," he pointed out. He paused when the elevator doors opened, waiting for Aaron to go first.

"He has the team," Aaron said, walking ahead of Dave.

"And you're the SAC," Dave pointed out. "You're his role model, for all intents and purposes." He caught up with Aaron. "He couldn't have a better one, as far as I'm concerned, but he should be aware of your, mm, shortcomings." A smile flickered across his face and was gone. "Maybe I ought to just give him my list."

"I'm not sure 'too fucking married' would really help him," Aaron said, and he looked over at Dave, glad Dave was smiling. "Reid's more than aware of my shortcomings. I've probably told him more than most on the team. Yourself not included."

Dave snorted. "No, I suppose it wouldn't." He walked a while longer in silence. "I know you don't need my approval," he began, and it ached just a little at how true that was, "but you _have_ done a fine job with this team."

Aaron stopped and turned to face Dave, his brows drawn together. "Why are you telling me this?" he asked, genuinely curious, because this was the last thing he'd expected when he'd told Dave to meet him in his office.

"Because..." Dave paused. "Because I'm not sure if you realize it. And because even if you don't need to hear it, maybe I need to say it." He looked away again. "I went out and became a commercial success and a personal failure. And you're still here, and even if Haley never saw you as a success because you're not working as a lawyer, you've succeeded more than I ever did. You kept to what mattered most."

"And yet, I'm still a personal failure, just as much as you are," Aaron said. God, he was tired. "You're supposed to be mad at me," he informed Dave after a minute, and then started walking again.

"I can be mad at you and still admire you at the same time," Dave said. "I'm a complicated person. I'm capable of complex things like that."

Aaron laughed softly and shook his head. "I'm not mad at you either," he said.

Dave shrugged and decided not to acknowledge it. "Am I driving, since you're buying, or are we meeting there?"

Aaron looked over at Dave, wondering if Dave still _was_ angry. Aaron had felt it fading quickly after the case had ended, the entire weekend slowly draining what was left of his energy to remain mad. And maybe he would be mad once he was better rested, but it was hard to stay mad at Dave for very long even in the worst of cases. "I thought saying that would get me out of buying you a steak."

Dave raised his eyebrows and stopped by his truck, leaning against the tailgate. "Well, we never did finish that bottle of wine we opened the other night," he said, watching Aaron speculatively. "If you have more Thanksgiving in a box, I could count that as buying me dinner."

Aaron drew a deep breath, wondering if it was a good idea to go home with Dave when all he really wanted right now was the comfort of Dave's arms around him like Dave had held him before their fight a few days ago. "I was kidding," he said lightly.

"I really am in the mood for steak," Dave said slowly, "but I mostly said it to piss you off. Hell, we can eat fast food if you want." He studied Aaron's face. "You're tired."

Aaron shook his head and ignored the last part. "Whatever you want to do," he said.

"I thought you said you needed more control," Dave countered. He folded his arms across his chest, his gaze challenging.

Aaron tilted his head and gave Dave a look. "Over things I care about, not what I eat or where we go right now. Do you exist to make my life difficult, David?"

Dave smirked. "Pretty much. What are we doing?"

Aaron sighed. "I couldn't care less." He pushed keyless lock for his car and it beeped at him, and then he looked back at Dave. "Let's do cheap food and good wine that's been breathing a couple weeks, and I'll buy you a steak when I'm ready to make an honest man of you," he said, his lips quirking to the side slightly.

Dave's eyebrows shot up, but the smirk didn't fade. "That's a hell of a wait for a good steak," he said lightly, but he pushed away from the truck and nodded.

Aaron smiled softly and got in his car. The whole drive to his house, he wondered if it was a good idea for them to be meeting alone again. When they got to the house, the nerves didn't fade, and Aaron almost wasn't hungry between being tired and not knowing when or how they were supposed to talk about what had happened. 

They made more small talk as they ate and they finished off the bottle of wine while Dave complained about the news--Aaron was almost starting to like that, the consistency, dependability, and familiarity of little routine they'd already fallen into so easily.

The longer the evening went without the topic of their relationship coming up, the more it felt like just another night, the sort of evening they'd spent together dozens of times in the past. Dave knew they ought to talk about this, even if he wasn't eager to--though Aaron's flippant remark about the steak had actually helped ease Dave's anxieties about that. Finally he stretched his legs out and tilted his head to lean against the back of the couch. "You're not just humoring me, are you, Aaron?" His voice was quiet.

Aaron looked over, his attention on the TV diverted and his eyebrows lifting a little in surprise. "How so?"

Dave frowned at his wineglass, choosing his words slowly. "What we had before...I know I was more invested in it than you were. Not your fault, I've never thought that. But now, you're not just humoring a delusional old guy, are you? You _do_ want this. Us."

Aaron pressed his lips together, and then turned his head to drop it against the back of the couch. "I told you before that I'm... I'm afraid of what I want. And that's mostly because I care about you. I know that I hurt you before, and I don't want to do it again, and I keep... fucking up with you because I do want you. More than I should have ever had any right to most of the time."

The words released the tension in Dave's chest, and he sighed. "You're not the only one who fucked up, Aaron. You were right, I didn't leave you any choice in the matter back then. I still think we did the right thing, but...I'm sorry I took that decision away from you." He squinted at the TV, then looked away. "I was trying to protect myself."

Aaron shook his head. "I would have made the same decision whether you'd let me or not, and both of us know it." He turned his head to look at Dave. "I should have had the self-control not to turn to you like I did." Aaron wondered suddenly why they were discussing the past rather than last weekend.

Dave laughed softly. "Believe me when I say that I've never once regretted that you did," he said. He took a breath and looked at Aaron. "What I do regret is walking away when I did. Leaving the Bureau, throwing away the best friendship I've ever had." He looked back at his wineglass. It was easier than watching Aaron's face as he admitted things like this. "Running away's always been easier, but it's never made me happy."

"Do you know how much I hate--" Aaron started, then shook his head. "You didn't throw anything away, you just put us on hiatus."

"Hate what?" Dave asked, looking back at him.

Aaron sighed and stared at his glass. "Knowing what you told me the other day. If I hadn't pulled you into my bed that night... You might have been perfectly happy."

"Don't try to downplay my part in all this, Aaron," Dave said. "I was just as culpable as you were. If I'd had a trace of nobility I would've refused, knowing you were hurting and needed affirmation. Instead I was selfish and went along with what you wanted, because it was what I wanted, too." He sighed and rubbed a palm down his face. "Look, the past is past. What we really need to think about is what we're doing now."

Aaron shook his head. "I don't know what we're doing now," he admitted. "I don't know what _I'm_ doing now, but I know I want you here with me." He shrugged and finished off the last of the wine in his glass.

Dave nodded. "All right." He ran one fingertip along the lip of his glass. "Then I'll be here."

Aaron nodded too. "Sorry." He looked at Dave. "What I said the other night."

Dave shrugged. "It was all true."

Aaron smiled faintly. "I know," he said, his tone light. "I still shouldn't have said it."

"Maybe it needed to be said." Dave drained his wine and sighed.

Aaron nodded. "Maybe."

"Whatever happens, we're moving forward from here." Dave turned his head to look at Aaron. "That's what matters."

"Okay," Aaron murmured, then reached over and took Dave's hand, twining his fingers with Dave's against the couch.

Dave smiled, watching him, and brushed his thumb against Aaron's. Just now, he wasn't sure there was anything else they needed to say. He could be patient, and whatever Aaron needed, they'd work through it.

*****

Dave wasn't sure why Aaron had chosen Doctor Reid to send to Philadelphia with him, unless it was related to their conversation of the week before. He _did_ know that Aaron _owed_ him for five hours in a car with Reid, one of which was taken up with the genius spouting statistics about traffic patterns and the worst stretches of road on the Eastern Seaboard. Dave had finally brought up the case out in Chula Vista just to shut him up. It had been too effective, sending the younger man into what felt like a very dark silence as Dave tried, in a very clumsy way, to make Reid understand that it wasn't his fault Jack Vaughan had murdered Ryan Phillips.

Finally, Dave had suggested they listen to Peter Coyote reading _Foundation_ , which had started a good-natured argument over which order the Foundation Series-- _trilogy_ , Dave kept insisting--should be read in. Dave had finally won by dint of saying, "Driver chooses the music," but Reid had, surprisingly, looked a lot happier after that, anyway.

Reid was an endearing person, and didn't seem to realize how much he both intimidated and overwhelmed people sometimes. Then again, Dave had the feeling maybe _he_ intimidated and overwhelmed Reid. Maybe this was some sort of growing experience Aaron had sent him on.

Of course, Jill Morris had acted like Reid wasn't even in the room, which had raised Dave's hackles a little. As soon as he realized it, he sighed and decided Aaron was too smart for his own good. Dave was invested in the team, and was getting to be just as protective of Reid as the rest of them.

Hours later, he had a headache and a very bad feeling about the person who'd left these papers, but there was nothing to suggest a crime had actually been committed. Agent Morris' sudden introduction of the hair was...convenient. But Dave couldn't ignore the possibility, so he called Aaron, who agreed to have the team come up.

When Hotch arrived in the Philadelphia field office, it didn't take long for Agent Morris to land herself on Hotch's radar as someone he needed to watched. Especially after she started treating his team like they answered to her, and Aaron could feel his team watch her too, Morgan in particular. 

Aaron didn't like having to pull rank with local agents--it was possible he disliked it even more than having to reprimand one of his own team, because at the end of the day the team was a family of sorts, and he knew it would be okay--but reprimanding _local_ agents most certainly wasn't conducive to concluding a case smoothly. Aaron let Agent Morris get away with throwing her weight around for a while, silently imparting calm as best he could with his team by keeping a cool head himself... until Agent Morris held a press conference that she hadn't told anyone about. And then Aaron had no choice.

And while he hadn't realized at the time that Dave had heard every word, that much became apparent later when they'd argued in front of the team after Aaron found out Dave had known Morris falsified evidence.

Dave hadn't been able to get Aaron's words to Jill out of his head. He knew Aaron hadn't realized he was outside her office, but it didn't really matter whether Aaron spoke the words to Dave or someone else. He'd still said them, and he'd meant them, there was no question of that. _The last thing the Bureau needs is another agent_ \--like Dave. Someone out to make a name for himself, like Dave had. Dave had done his best to explain to Jill, when she'd shown up and offered him a drink, that there was nothing he regretted more than the bridges he'd burned in the process of making himself a commercial success.

As the investigation continued, it had become obvious to Dave that the team disliked Jill Morris. Even Emily, who had started out defending her out of gender solidarity, eventually reached a point where she looked at Jill as if she were crazy. Dave understood. Jill was getting so obsessed with finding the unsub that she forgot to think about the victims. Still, it made him question how the team viewed _him_. Did they see that he'd done the same things Jill had? Did they look at him as someone who put himself ahead of the victims and the cases?

He tried to push the concerns out of his mind when Jill went missing, but the scene in the parking garage infuriated him. He'd _told_ her to be careful, to check her ego, and she'd ignored him--and now she was gone, and he hadn't made a damn bit of difference. The irony of Spencer trying to comfort _him_ by telling him he couldn't have known what she would do didn't escape him, but it didn't make things any better, either.

Finding Jill alive helped. The fact that her first words were, "I'm sorry," helped more. He held her tightly and reassured her, relieved, but so damn tired. And then, leaving the hospital, she'd proved, with her decision to talk to the press, that nothing he'd done or said had changed a thing. It felt like a betrayal. He'd slammed the door of the SUV when he got in, and spent the first half hour of the ride in silence, not looking at Aaron.

Aaron was silent most of the drive, just letting Dave seethe. He'd been waiting for Dave in the parking lot, and hadn't missed the long look Dave had exchanged with Morris as he passed the press. When Aaron pulled into a parking spot outside of a gas station about halfway back for a bathroom break, he turned to look at Dave. "I meant what I said back there."

"What's that?" Dave asked, not acknowledging the look.

"That you're nothing like her." Aaron turned around and stared out the front window when Dave didn't face him.

"Like hell I'm not. That girl--I know her. I _was_ her. And nothing I said to her made a damn bit of difference. All she can see is that everyone turns and stares when I walk into a damn field office." Dave clenched his jaw, then tried to make himself relax. It wasn't Aaron he was angry at, not really. It still _hurt_ , remembering what Aaron had said to Jill, but Dave wasn't angry. It had all been true.

Aaron drew a long breath. He somehow had a feeling Dave would try to talk sense into her; he'd passed Agent Morris on her way to Dave's room the night before, and once Aaron quelled the surge of irrational possessiveness over Dave at the idea that he might let her in, he didn't say a thing to her. "Some people have to make their own mistakes," Aaron said, then looked back at Dave. 

Dave shook his head. "She came to my room the other night," he said. "I was looking over the case. She apologized to me because you ripped into her." He glanced at Aaron and then looked away again. No need to tell Aaron that Dave knew exactly what he'd said. No need to say he'd hoped, when he heard the knock on his door, that it had been _Aaron_. "She bought me a drink. I tried to explain the cost of making your name the way I did. Told her I'd burned too many bridges in the process..."

Aaron nodded, slightly relieved he wasn't going to have to ask what Morris had wanted. "Gideon once told me you were arrogant, reckless, and bad with the press. And I told him that I knew that." He looked at Dave. "I'm not unaware of your shortcomings, but the fact remains that I don't think you're anything like Agent Morris."

Dave snorted. "You're probably the only one in the Bureau who doesn't," he said. He looked at Aaron again. "When was it that Gideon said that? Thirteen years ago, or two?" He couldn't help but be amused by that. Gideon always had known his team well.

Aaron smiled. "I think it was when he was warning me about you when I first joined the Bureau."

That provoked a genuine laugh. "Unfair," Dave said. "I had to do all my own digging on my new partner."

Aaron's smile broadened. "His warnings weren't the sort of thing I could or would have even known to dig for." With that, he promptly got out of the car to head into the gas station.

Dave followed, scowling. "What's that supposed to mean, Hotshot?" He realized as soon as he said it that Aaron had, that easily, delivered an early death to the brood Dave had been sinking into.

"That he knew of your proclivities and had noticed your newest interest at the time," Aaron said simply as he made his way back to the coffee maker and frowned at the too thick liquid it dripped when he pushed the handle.

That threw Dave for a moment, then sent a quick burn of anger through him, which faded almost immediately. He'd suspected as much, but still... "Jason told you how I felt? When?"

"Not how you _felt_ , what he _suspected_ , and it was well before Athens." Aaron turned to look at Dave. Dave didn't need to know that Gideon had told Aaron that Dave loved him. Gideon hadn't said it in so many words, but Aaron knew it now. "Didn't you have to go to the bathroom?" he asked, darting a significant glance to the back of the station.

"No, I think I'm going to be sick," Dave growled. "Did the whole damn BAU know?" He stalked off to the bathroom, unsure why he suddenly felt so mortified. He'd always been quiet about his liaisons after Kay, but they'd never been a dirty secret. Leming had known Dave occasionally went to bed with men, and their work relationship had never been affected. He wasn't sure if Conover had known--there probably would have been a much larger number of lewd remarks, if he had--but he'd always known Gideon was aware.

Aaron watched Dave walk away. Somehow that wasn't the reaction he'd been expecting, and Aaron wanted to kick himself. He'd just made Dave feel better, and then pissed him off again. Aaron went to pay for the sludge in his coffee cup and headed back to the car to wait.

Dave got a Coke on his way out, since Aaron had tipped him off to the appalling quality of the coffee. He gave Aaron an apologetic look when he got back. "How long did you know before I said anything?" he asked quietly.

Aaron shrugged. "How long I knew, or how long between when Gideon told me and when you said something? ...A month? Two? I honestly thought Gideon was out of his mind at first." _I thought he was out of his mind when he implied I'd hurt you too, but look at what happened_.

Dave snorted. "He always did know his team." He shifted in his seat to face Aaron. "You were young and eager, totally in love with the law and completely dedicated to helping people. You were good at your job and you never once rested on past success. It was exciting. You made me glad to be a part of that." He smiled faintly. "And I got to know you. You let me in. You were irresistible. Still are."

"I'm starting to think you idealize me," Aaron said, but he couldn't ignore the way he felt suddenly warmer, or the way he wanted to kiss Dave right now. Instead, he reached over and cupped his hand against Dave's jaw, smiling softly.

"Maybe just a little," Dave murmured. "But you usually live up to it." He couldn't help wondering if this was really the best way for Aaron to find out who he was on his own, with Dave always around. But Dave certainly wasn't going to bring it up.

Aaron shook his head and dropped his hand, then started the car, still feeling the scrape of Dave's goatee against his palm.

The drive back to Quantico was more comfortable after that. Dave settled back gratefully in his seat, letting his eyelids droop as he watched Aaron. They didn't talk much, but the silences were easy. Dave had to fight back a snicker as they got caught in a traffic snarl, thinking about the way Reid had spouted statistics at him. He reached out and slid his fingers over Aaron's. "You sent Spencer with me on purpose, didn't you?" he asked quietly.

Aaron had been scowling at the traffic, but he sucked in a breath at Dave's touch. He'd thought Dave had fallen asleep a few minutes ago. "Mmm," he hummed, letting the breath out audibly. "I sent the most experienced and the smartest," he said, turning his hand to curl his fingers around Dave's. Morgan's expertise was obsessional crimes and could have gone in place of Reid, but Aaron had though a road trip with Dave might do them both good.

"Uh huh." Dave smiled. "He's started calling me David." It was nice, actually. Reid was treating him more like a coworker than a revered professor or a rock star or something.

What was left of Aaron's frown completely faded. "Good." He wondered how much of that was because Aaron called Dave by his first name; Reid still called Morgan and Garcia by their last names more often than not. Aaron signaled and got into a slightly faster lane, then frowned again when it stopped dead. "I knew he'd get over the hero-worship eventually," he said lightly, in spite of the expression on his face.

"Apparently the I-95 corridor between Washington and Springfield is one of the top ten worst traffic tie-ups in America," Dave said, his lips quirking as he remembered some of Reid's spiel about traffic. "I believe backups of fifteen to twenty miles are common." He closed his eyes, frankly not caring how long it took them to get back to Quantico.

The car was nearly stopped, so Aaron took a moment to turn a baleful gaze on Dave. But Dave's eyes were closed and that small smile was still on Dave's face. Aaron just gave Dave's hand a small squeeze and looked back at the road. "Keep talking like that and I'll make you call him to see if there are faster ways to go."

"Of course. Take 495 instead." Dave snickered and glanced over at Aaron. "At least I'm giving you the Cliffs Notes version. It took him twenty minutes to tell me that much." He smiled and closed his eyes again.

Aaron merged into another lane and shook his head. "So he's doing all right then," he assessed.

Dave shrugged. "You know him better than I do," he said. "When I did bring up the Vaughan case, he got really quiet. I did my best, but..." He snorted. "Of course, maybe some of what I said got through to him. He was actually trying to reassure _me_ up in Philadelphia."

Aaron breathed a small laugh. "He's stronger than he thinks he is." Of course, the expression of Reid's face as he stared at Ryan Phillips' body was one Aaron hadn't seen Reid wear in a very long time.

Dave nodded. "And he has an entire team of people who care about him." He paused, then added, "Especially Derek," just to see what Aaron would say.

Aaron glanced over, then back at the road. "A lot's changed since Reid joined the team."

"Like what?"

"Nearly everything," Aaron answered, and then realized that his answer was not only vague, but that telling Dave what had happened to Reid in Georgia or about the fallout after the Hankel case felt like a betrayal of trust. "They didn't used to get along all that well."

"He seems protective of Reid. The whole team does, really." Dave smiled. "I'm not entirely convinced he needs to be protected, but I can understand why. Hell, I got pissed off at Jill Morris when she acted like I was the only one who'd come up to work on the case."

Aaron glanced at Dave, and then a slow smile spread across his face as he looked back at the road. A moment later he was grinning to himself.

"What?" Dave's tone was defensive; he knew exactly what was amusing Aaron. 

"Nothing," Aaron replied, but be still wasn't able to fight his amusement that Dave had taken to Reid exactly like Aaron knew he would.

"Shut up." Dave didn't let go of Aaron's hand, though. He did close his eyes, content to let the subject drop if Aaron would.


	8. Chapter 8

Twenty years. It seemed impossible that it was actually over. Dave had returned from Indianapolis feeling empty, almost. Drained. Old.

Of course, his initial plan, to go home and open a bottle of scotch, got derailed when Reid informed him that Kevin Lynch was waiting to see him. Dave had sat at his desk in silence born of utter shock as Lynch informed him that showing up at Penelope's door in the middle of the night was not only an unacceptable crossing of personal boundaries, but also 'ungentlemanly' and 'unbecoming'. When Lynch wound down, Dave had apologized just to get the younger man out of his office. He'd managed not to burst out laughing during his dressing-down, but as soon as Lynch was safely away, Dave had shut his office door and slumped against it, unable to muffle his laughter.

His amusement hadn't lasted long, though, and he'd eventually left without answering Reid's confused questions about what Lynch had wanted, and without doing more than glancing in at Aaron through the window of his office. Aaron had looked preoccupied, anyway, so Dave just took at face value Reid's assessment of the custodial with Hartwick as 'ultimately uneventful'. They could discuss it later.

Shithead greeted him at the door, and as soon as Dave had shrugged out of his jacket, he picked the cat up and scratched under his chin. "Twenty years, buddy," he murmured. "That's longer than you've been alive." He'd hated seeing what had become of those kids, but hopefully getting their parents' home back would help. It was a nice house, and he'd seen to it that it was well kept up. Money from the sale could set them all on new paths, get Connie out of that topless bar she thought he didn't know about, maybe put Georgie and Alicia through school.

He sighed and carried Shithead out to the kitchen to feed him. It was strange to be without the case that had obsessed him for so long. "Maybe scotch is called for, after all," he said aloud, and carried the bottle to the living room, where he turned on the CD player and invited Elvis to brood with him.

Aaron hadn't seen Dave leave the office. Aaron hadn't paid much attention to anything at all since he and Reid had returned to the BAU after what had been one giant mess of a custodial. All he'd done was sit in his office and stared at those divorce papers. And then he'd signed them. And it didn't matter that he _knew_ he and Haley were over already, or that he _knew_ he had Dave, it still felt like cutting out a part of him.

And on the flip side, it felt good too--almost like a burden had been lifted, like he was taking one step closer to moving on, which he knew he had to do, even if it was painful. He'd managed to push aside a lot of the hurt before he'd headed out of his office. He got stopped by Morgan on his way out, who apparently hadn't believed Reid when had told them all the custodial was "uneventful".

Aaron told him it was the truth, all except for the part where Reid likely saved Aaron from being beaten to a bloody pulp. Morgan seemed surprised, but amused... and then told him he thought Aaron should check on Dave. Morgan wouldn't tell him why, but he did at least say Dave was okay.

Twenty minutes later, Aaron was knocking on Dave's door, feeling uncomfortable not knowing what he was walking into, but too concerned to leave. And if he was honest, he needed the company too.

Dave frowned and pushed Shithead off his lap, then made his way to the door. Couldn't be anyone but Aaron, but he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. He opened the door and sighed. "You should have got here while I was still halfway sober," he said, and turned around to go back to the couch, without waiting for Aaron to come in.

Aaron's eyebrows lifted and he stared at Dave for a moment before stepping inside and shutting the door behind him. "You don't sound overly happy, so I'm assuming you're not drinking in _celebration_ of something," Aaron hazarded, and went to the kitchen to get himself a glass, stepping over the cat awkwardly every few steps as it tried to twine itself around his ankles.

Dave slumped on the couch and swirled the scotch in his glass. "I'm sure you know where I was while you and Reid were with Hartwick." He'd told Aaron about the Galen case at least once when they'd been partners before, though he'd avoided discussing that part of his 'unfinished business' with Aaron since returning to the BAU.

Aaron looked back in the living room, and then decided on a Coke instead of Scotch. He walked back into the room and sat next to Dave, popping open the can. "I could try to guess, but it would be easier if you told me."

"You mean JJ hasn't had you signing paperwork making the Galen case an official BAU assignment?" Dave rubbed a hand across his eyes and let his head fall back against the couch. "I honestly didn't think any of those kids liked me," he admitted. "Except Spencer. And then half the fucking team shows up just because they're _worried_ about me." He closed his eyes.

Oh. Galen. Aaron vaguely remembered that name. He frowned in thought, looking from Dave to the glass in Dave's hand. "We're a team," he said. "And you're part of it. Don't tell me you're getting drunk because they care about you."

Dave let out a long sigh. "I've held on to this case for so long...I just. Twenty years obsessing over it. It's strange, I always thought solving it would bring some kind of peace. A sense of closure. Instead I feel...empty." He drained his glass and considered another.

_And Morgan knew that_ , Aaron thought, but he just kept his gaze on Dave. "What happened?"

"We solved it." Dave let out a mirthless laugh and reached for the bottle. " _They_ solved it. Derek and Penelope, mostly, I was just...dead weight. There isn't a single case I've given more hours or obsessing to in my life, and..." He shrugged.

Aaron shook his head and took the bottle from Dave, more to get his attention than out of any notion to stop Dave from drinking. "You have _never_ been dead weight."

Dave blinked at Aaron, feeling a little muzzy. Maybe he _had_ had enough. "When I took the team by to meet the kids...Connie stood in the street and told me to leave them alone. Basically told me to just let her parents stay dead." He shook his head and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I called them every year, just to promise I was still looking for answers...and they just wanted to forget." He'd rarely been as humiliated as that moment when his blood had run cold, witnessing Connie's rage and hatred for _him_...and in front of his team.

Aaron sighed, his heart aching, and reached over to touch Dave, resting the bottle on his knee. He stroked his hand down Dave's spine, then let it rest at the small of Dave's back. "That's... completely natural," he murmured, and in all honesty, he would have wanted to forget too, but victims rarely thought about the trauma that helplessness could instill in those trying to help them. "But you didn't leave when she told you to. Something changed..." he prompted.

Dave shrugged. "She told me to stop sending the gifts." He closed his eyes, leaning just a little into Aaron's touch. "I never sent them gifts. Derek looked at the ones they still had and told us who we were looking for, and Penelope found the guy." He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "Maybe that's part of it, too," he admitted. "I kept thinking justice would be done when I found the son of a bitch who brutalized John and Rebecca Galen. But...he didn't understand, Aaron. He was mentally impaired, he had no _capacity_ to understand. He didn't mean to do it, and when Derek and JJ arrested him, he was terrified. There's no justice there. There's no fucking point." He reached out and took the bottle back.

Aaron sighed, but let the bottle slip from his fingers anyway. "The point is that you can let it go," he said. "How did the kids take it?" _Kids, like they're all still little_ , he mused.

"Acted like it was a victory and made me buy 'em drinks since I picked my hotel with my comfort in mind." Dave hunched his shoulders and poured himself another glass. "I flew commercial. I wasn't going to make the FBI foot the bill for my personal vendetta."

It took Aaron a moment to follow, and then he chuckled softly. "I meant the Galen kids," he said, running his hand along Dave's back again. "But I'll be sure to tell Morgan you think of him that way."

Startled, Dave blinked. "They're all youngsters compared to me," he muttered, but thinking about the Galen kids eased some of the tension in his body. "Connie asked if she could call me sometimes," he said, his voice softening as he remembered. "Just to let me know how they're doing."

Aaron gave Dave a small tug towards him. "Wasn't pointless then, was it?"

Dave's eyes widened a little, and he resisted going with the tug. "Aaron..."

Aaron sighed and dropped his hand.

"I'm drunk, and you're confusing," Dave muttered. He rubbed a hand over his face.

Aaron looked at Dave a moment, knowing Dave was right on both points, but still thinking that it would do more good than harm to comfort Dave. "You're allowed to hold me and I'm not allowed to do the same? You're not making much sense either..."

Dave took a short breath, then gulped at his scotch and set the half-empty glass aside. "You ought to be used to that by now," he murmured, moving closer to Aaron.

Aaron shook his head and pulled Dave against his chest. "You're usually a lot more lucid." He slid his arms around Dave and buried his nose in Dave's hair.

Dave sighed and relaxed against Aaron, grateful for his strength. Sometimes he just got too tired to be strong for himself any more. He took a couple of deep breaths, then slid an arm around Aaron's waist, pulling him closer. "I..."

Aaron closed his eyes, enjoying the closeness a little more than he knew he should allow himself, and then lifted his hand to stroke his fingers through Dave's hair. "What?"

"I need you," Dave breathed, closing his eyes. Aaron knew that. It was a stupid thing to say, especially since they'd been trying to maintain some sort of distance lately. But he couldn't stop the words.

Aaron drew in a deep breath, hesitated, and then kissed the top of Dave's head. "I know," he said, sliding his hand down Dave's side to let it rest there and opening his eyes again. "I suppose it goes without saying that it's mutual."

Dave let out a slow breath and leaned a little more into Aaron's embrace. _What the hell are we doing?_ he wanted to ask. _We both know damn well what we want, and it's the same damn thing. Why are we dancing around this?_ But he knew why, intellectually, and he'd accepted Aaron's decision. "You're a lot more comforting than Shithead," he mumbled instead.

It took Aaron a moment, but he laughed and kissed Dave again. "I should hope so." he pressed his cheek to Dave's hair. God, this _was_ confusing. He closed his eyes again and tried to drown out the confusion by going over everything that happened today. Which didn't help. "I signed my divorce papers," he whispered.

There was a brief silence, then Dave admitted, "I'm not sure whether I should say I'm sorry or it's about damn time." His voice was quiet and warm; he hoped Aaron wouldn't take offense. He tightened his arm around Aaron.

"Say what you want," Aaron said, stroking his thumb against Dave's shirt.

Dave sighed. "I think they're both true. You know, of all the things that haven't changed in thirteen years, this is the biggest. No one has ever confused the hell out of me the way you do."

Aaron frowned, and immediately felt bad. "Sorry," he murmured, and started to pull away.

Dave tightened his arm, suddenly annoyed at how touchy they were around each other sometimes. "Shut up, Aaron," he growled, and lifted his head to press their lips together firmly.

Aaron sucked in a sharp breath, surprised as a thrill went through his entire body. He curled his fingers into Dave's shirt. "Dave," he whispered against Dave's lips.

"Why do you think I've never been able to stop thinking about you?" Dave murmured. "Maybe I like that about you." He kissed Aaron again, then pulled away and sighed, dropping his head to rest it on Aaron's shoulder.

Aaron closed his eyes, wondering when he'd lost his breath. He consider briefly calling Dave a tease, but he wasn't sure it would be a good idea for Dave to kiss him again, and he knew Dave could probably turn the same complaint on him. 

"It wasn't meant as a criticism," Dave added finally, when Aaron didn't say anything. He didn't pull away.

"I know," Aaron said, and slid down on the couch a bit. "I just... I hate not knowing what the right choice is... I hate... guessing."

"Which choice are you talking about right now?" Dave asked. He shifted a little so his shoulder wouldn't dig into Aaron's chest.

Aaron shook his head. "Never mind."

"Hey, talk to me, Hotshot," Dave said, his voice soft. He shifted more so he could look Aaron in the face. After a moment he lifted a hand to brush Aaron's cheek with his knuckles. "Don't 'never mind' me."

Aaron closed his eyes at the touch. "You might be used to me confusing you, but I'm not used to confusing myself."

It surprised Dave into laughing. "God, your life must be charmed. Most of the rest of us confuse ourselves all the time." He smiled at Aaron, his gaze warm.

Aaron opened his eyes to give Dave a look, pursing his lips, but he couldn't manage any heat to it. After a moment, the expression faded and he leaned in to kiss Dave again.

Dave went still, feeling a jolt as if he'd stuck his finger in a light socket. Then he kissed Aaron back, one hand lifting to bury itself in the too-short hair. Dave really hated that haircut.

Dave tasted like scotch, but Aaron cupped his jaw and deepened the kiss, his body somewhere between want and utter sick fear that he was doing the worst thing he possibly could right now. "This isn't what I'd meant to do," he murmured.

"I know," Dave replied, his lips brushing Aaron's. He kissed Aaron again to keep from saying words that might complicate this.

Aaron hummed into the kiss and flattened his hand against Dave to slide it down his thigh. "How drunk are you?" he whispered, kissing Dave again. "Honestly."

"Not as drunk as I meant to be," Dave replied, an odd surge of emotion going through him. He didn't want to inspect it too closely, but he knew it was hope, and he prayed he wasn't about to get those hopes dashed.

"That's... not the answer I was hoping for," Aaron whispered, but now that he'd started kissing Dave it was hard to stop. When his hand reached Dave's knee, Aaron leaned into Dave and slid it back up Dave's thigh.

"I'm not so drunk I couldn't say no," Dave murmured, smiling faintly. He kissed Aaron again, then took a quick breath. _Don't say it_ , he told himself, and pressed his lips to Aaron's again.

"That's not my point," Aaron murmured, but his kisses were growing more hungry. "I--" he breathed, then stopped and slid his hand under the bottom of Dave's shirt, sucking in a breath at the way it felt to touch Dave again.

"Aaron," Dave breathed. He ran his fingers through Aaron's hair and closed his eyes. "I want this, Aaron. I love you." The moment the words were out he wanted them back. They were true, but it was too much to say them out loud. It was unnecessary. They both knew. He kissed Aaron, trying to pretend he hadn't spoken.

Aaron sucked in a breath, the fear he had been feeling returning in full force. He froze, then pulled back just a few inches, suddenly unable to breathe. After a few moments of labored breathing, he leaned in and pressed kisses to Dave's jaw and cheek, wishing he could say the words back, but also wishing Dave hadn't said them at all.

"Shit," Dave muttered, turning his head away. He knew he shouldn't have said it. He just kept stroking his fingers through Aaron's hair, not looking at him.

Aaron frowned, closing his eyes, and then kissed the side of Dave's jaw he could reach now and slumped against Dave. "I just signed my divorce papers tonight," he murmured fatalistically.

Dave felt an odd surge of anger, but he pushed it away. "It'll always be something, Aaron," he replied, his voice low. "Are you going to spend the rest of our lives telling me no?"

"That's not fair," Aaron said without hesitation, but he didn't move.

"To whom? There are two of us here." Dave sighed and shook his head. "Shut up, Dave," he muttered, and turned his head to kiss Aaron again, slowly.

A flash of irritation went through Aaron, but Dave's kiss soothed much of it away. "What do you want me to do, Dave? I can't... say it back."

"I want you to come to bed," Dave said honestly. Of course Aaron couldn't say it back, and Dave hadn't expected him to, but being _told_ that still hurt. God, they were the most fucked-up pair ever.

God, that sounded good. Aaron pressed his lips to Dave's jaw. "You're also drunk."

"I'm not _that_ drunk," Dave said, and turned his head to kiss Aaron again.

Aaron drew a deep breath. He wanted this. He wanted Dave. He was starting to feel like a cock-tease. He nodded. "Okay," he whispered, and kissed Dave again before pulling back to meet Dave's eyes. "Okay."

"Okay," Dave echoed, and kissed Aaron more hungrily than he'd dared before. He stood, closing his fingers on the front of Aaron's shirt and tugging gently.

Aaron followed, wrapping his arms around Dave and sliding his hand under the back of Dave's shirt. He still felt like he wasn't doing the right thing, but he was starting to wonder if there even was a "right" thing. Dave wanted him, and he wanted Dave. Aaron hummed softly against Dave's lips and let Dave pull him down the hallway.

Dave waited until they were in the bedroom before he started working at the buttons of Aaron's shirt. "No tie," he mumbled, his lips brushing along Aaron's jaw. He nudged Aaron closer to the bed with his hip.

Aaron slid his hands around the front of Dave's shirt and started to push it up, shrugging. "Threatened to beat up Chester Hartwick today," he said casually, then kissed Dave hard to keep him quiet.

Dave made a surprised noise, though Aaron didn't give him a chance to ask. He let Aaron pull his shirt off instead, then pushed Aaron's shirt off his shoulders. "Spencer stop you?" he murmured, and kissed Aaron again as his hands stroked down Aaron's chest.

"One way of putting it," Aaron breathed, pulling Dave back towards the bed and then climbing onto it. He pulled Dave down with him and threaded his fingers in Dave's hair. "God, Dave," he panted.

"Yes," Dave breathed, and kissed Aaron again. This was familiar, and so good. He slid a hand down to work at Aaron's pants. He hoped this wasn't going to come to a stop again.

"Dave," Aaron breathed again, moving to help Dave get his pants open as his fingers fumbled at Dave's zipper. He pressed up against Dave with a small moan, then nipped at Dave's lip, his kisses growing more needy. "I'm sorry I've been--" he murmured, then stopped himself. "I want you."

"I know," Dave murmured, smiling faintly. He kissed Aaron, drawing it out as his fingers slid inside Aaron's fly to brush teasingly at his arousal.

Aaron sucked in a breath at the touch and let his eyes flutter shut for a moment. "Mmph," he breathed and shifted up against Dave, pushing down at Dave's pants.

Dave helped Aaron get his pants down, pushing his shoes off with them and letting them all fall to the floor. "Naked," he murmured, kissing Aaron's neck and chest as his hands went to Aaron's pants to tug them down.

Aaron shifted, arching his hips to let Dave finish undressing him, then he pulled Dave in for another kiss, sucking in a sharp breath at the feeling of Dave's excitement against him. It was just as strange as the first time, but still just as good too. "Sexy," he whispered, sliding his hands down to grip Dave's ass and pull their hips together.

The pleasure that burned through Dave made him gasp. He shifted, kissing Aaron hard. "Wanted this for so long." He ran his hands down Aaron's sides. "Aaron."

Aaron moaned into the kiss and shifted to let Dave slip between his legs. "Have me," he whispered.

"God," Dave breathed, a shiver of desire going through him at those words. He pressed his hips against Aaron's, making a strangled noise of pleasure.

Aaron gasped and thrust up against Dave with a wanton noise he couldn't quite control. "You can do better than spit this time, right?" Aaron breathed, his lips curling slightly. It wasn't as though they'd ever actually had to resort to spit after their first time together in Athens, but this felt a lot like the first time again. Except that Aaron wasn't trying to bury his feelings in this, and he supposed that even if he wasn't sure he could give Dave back everything Dave was giving him, it was an improvement, at least.

"Man, some people have such high standards," Dave muttered in amusement. He fumbled at the drawer in his bedside table, but he wasn't making much progress, since he didn't want to stop kissing Aaron.

"Mmm, is that a surprise?" Aaron murmured, chuckling as Dave uselessly felt for the lube. "I missed you," he whispered, his heart giving a funny tug at the words, and he wasn't sure if that was a good or bad sign yet.

Dave paused in his search and brushed his lips across Aaron's jaw. "Good." He pressed his forehead to Aaron's cheek for a moment, then dragged his attention to what he was doing.

Aaron closed his eyes at the touch, and then turned his gaze to watch Dave dig in his nightstand. When Dave moved back over him, Aaron looked up at him for a moment, then lifted his hand, brushing his knuckles along Dave's jaw until he could thread his fingers into the graying hair at Dave's temple.

Dave smiled slowly, his gaze warm. "You're so handsome," he murmured, looking down at Aaron. After a moment he kissed Aaron again.

Aaron sighed, relaxing even more under the gentle swipes of Dave's tongue and sliding his arms around Dave's waist, letting his hands stroke down Dave's spine. "Fuck me," he whispered.

The warm invitation in Aaron's voice was wonderful. Dave hummed in acknowledgment and rolled his hips against Aaron's again. He got the lube open to slick his fingers, skating the back of his hand down to Aaron's ass. "Want you," he murmured.

"Yes," Aaron murmured, and it occurred to him that he should be nervous. He hadn't done this, or anything like it, in over a decade. But looking up at Dave, there was no hesitation.

Dave pressed a kiss against Aaron's jaw, then nibbled lightly, smiling at the faint scratch of stubble against his lips. His fingers slid down the curve of Aaron's ass, teasing lightly at his entrance.

Aaron sucked in a breath, the feeling of Dave's finger sending a ripple of pleasure through his entire body, causing his untouched cock to pulse with need. He made an unintelligible noise of desire and pressed down against Dave's hand.

"You missed this, too, didn't you?" Dave murmured. He licked Aaron's earlobe and sucked it into his mouth. Slowly, he pressed his finger inside Aaron, paying attention to his reaction. It must have been a long time since he'd had this, maybe even since they were together. Haley didn't strike Dave as the sort to go in for kinky sex.

"Nngh," Aaron managed, his breath leaving him suddenly at the slide of Dave's finger. It was a little uncomfortable, but not as much as Aaron remembered from their first time last time; it was easier to relax this time. "Yes," he breathed. " _You_."

Dave hummed and slid his finger a little further, seeking out Aaron's prostate. God, he loved making Aaron react like this.

"God," Aaron panted, moaning and pressing down more when Dave hit _that spot_. "Been a long time. Mmph, Dave..."

Dave smiled, then nibbled and sucked down Aaron's neck. He rubbed lightly with his finger, enjoying the noises Aaron made. His own body was thrumming with desire. He shifted his hips to get friction for his cock.

Aaron was starting to lose control of the way Dave made him whimper and moan, his body loosening under Dave's ministrations. And then Dave thrust against him, and Aaron gasped and snaked his hand between them, grasping both their cocks with one hand and stroking, a strangled noise escaping as he did.

That tore a moan from Dave's lips and he went still for a moment, panting. "Aaron, yes," he murmured. He slid a second finger inside Aaron. He had to work not to lose himself to the pleasure of Aaron's hand on him.

Aaron's hand stilled and he arched under Dave's touch, panting hard as Dave stretched him further. Once he thought he could breathe again, he slid his hand over them again, his index finger slipping between them for a moment, and then over the head of Dave's cock. "Dave," he whispered. "That's enough."

"Enough?" Dave breathed, his voice coming out a little strangled. "Nnh...you sure?" He kissed the skin against his lips and lifted his head to look at Aaron. "Don't want to hurt you." He didn't, but he _was_ getting more eager to be _inside_. "God."

Aaron met Dave's gaze. He'd adjust to Dave's cock just as easily as his fingers, even if it took a moment longer. He pulled Dave down to kiss him in answer.

Dave groaned into the kiss, his tongue sliding eagerly against Aaron's. His chest felt tight, and after a moment he pulled back to catch his breath. "Yes," he murmured, and slid his fingers out to slick his cock instead. "Gorgeous, Aaron. Perfect." He kissed him again, positioning himself so his cock nudged at Aaron's opening. "I want you."

"Mmm," Aaron hummed, and slid his hands down to give Dave a nudge, a wordless invitation to _take_ as he kissed Dave again. God, he should really be more nervous, but he just _wasn't_.

Dave pressed in slowly, moaning in enjoyment at the tight heat surrounding him. Pleasure slid through his body.

Aaron gasped and gripped Dave once Dave was fully inside him, stopping Dave for a moment while he adjusted. He was panting hard against Dave's shoulder, and then he pressed kisses along it and up Dave's neck until the pleasure-pain became more pleasure than anything else. "Fuck, I did miss this," he panted.

Smiling slightly, Dave tilted his head to give Aaron better access. "So did I," he breathed, burying his free hand in Aaron's hair. "God, Aaron, so did I." He shifted, letting Aaron readjust to the feeling of him moving.

Aaron hummed a small pleased noise as Dave moved, touching Dave's chin and kissing him slowly. He slid his hand up into Dave's hair as they kissed, letting his other hand slide to the small of Dave's back to let him move again.

Dave rocked his hips against Aaron, feeling breathless with excitement and the pleasure washing through him. It was so good to be with Aaron again, to finally have this after all these years.

The discomfort returned when Dave started to move, but it didn't last long, and Aaron hooked a leg between Dave's and pushed down. "Yes."

Dave let out a quiet moan and pulled almost out, then pushed back in, breathing raggedly. He trailed kisses along Aaron's jaw as he began to thrust slowly. "Aaron."

"Dave," Aaron returned, but his voice was tight with the pleasure of Dave's movements. It was hard not to think of the past, of everything they could have had; Aaron felt almost overwhelmed by it suddenly. "So good to me," he murmured.

"Shh," Dave breathed, brushing his nose along Aaron's jaw. "You deserve it." It was true, he _did_ idealize Aaron, but he thought someone should, because as far as he could tell, no one ever had. He kissed Aaron softly as they moved together.

Aaron snorted, but then Dave moved a little faster and Aaron moaned, pressing his head back against the pillow. "Nngh, I'm-- I-- _God_ , Dave!"

It was incredibly sexy seeing Aaron Hotchner at a loss for words. Dave gasped and shifted his angle to thrust deeper, watching Aaron's face. "Gorgeous," he panted.

Aaron tried to laugh, but it just came out in one breathy exhalation, each push of Dave's hips forcing another wordless sound of desire from him. "Shut up," he managed, his voice warm, and then draped his leg over Dave's hip, letting out another strangled noise at the burst of pleasure the new angle sent through him.

Dave smiled and leaned in to capture Aaron's mouth with his own. He slid a hand between them to curl around Aaron's cock, stroking in time with his thrusts.

Aaron nerves were already thrumming with the feeling of Dave over him and inside of him, and when Dave gripped his forgotten cock, Aaron moaned. He automatically slipped his other leg over Dave's hip, seeking more pleasure. "Yes!" he gasped, then kissed Dave harder.

"Mmm." Dave sped his thrusts, his breath catching in his chest. This was so much better than he'd remembered. He was glad for Aaron's mouth against his; it kept him from blurting out too many tender things. Pleasure was building inside him, driving his thrusts harder and faster as his control slipped.

It was amazing and wonderful, the way it felt to give up, to let Dave take so much pleasure from him in a way that he'd never let anyone else. Aaron was having a hard time catching his breath; he wasn't going to last much longer as the obvious pleasure Dave was feeling only spurred his own on.

Dave groaned, pressing his mouth to Aaron's neck and panting. "God--yes--close--" he managed, his thrusts gaining force. He couldn't hold back, and finally he cried out and came, going still over Aaron.

Aaron moaned, then kissed Dave again, slowly as Dave rode out his orgasm. Aaron's own body was straining with want, his heart pounding insistently against his chest. He tried to force his breath calm as he kissed Dave, trying to make his body wait for Dave to move again.

"God," Dave breathed finally, letting his forehead rest against Aaron's shoulder as his hand sped on Aaron's cock. "So good."

"Ungh," was all the came out of Aaron's mouth in reply as Dave's hand started to work over him again. The short pause had only made his need more intense. "Yes!" he gasped, his chest rising and falling under the weight of Dave's body.

Dave shifted, slipping out of Aaron and moving down to kiss Aaron's chest. He flicked his thumb across the head of Aaron's cock with each stroke. God, Aaron was wonderful like this. Dave's lips found a nipple and sucked lightly, his tongue teasing at the nub as it tightened under his attention.

Aaron's breath went even more unsteady and he arched up under Dave, panting. "Dave!" he gasped. "Oh, yes. Almost--"

Dave hummed and bit, very gently. The noise Aaron made sent a thrill through Dave, and then he felt the hot flood of release across his hand as Aaron came. He worked his hand, milking the last of Aaron's climax from him, then moved, smiling, to stretch out next to Aaron. They were both still breathing hard, and he wanted to maintain contact.

Aaron just stayed on his back, not feeling quite able to move yet. His body felt heavy and limp and he let his eyes flutter shut. "God," he breathed.

"Mmm." Dave turned his head to kiss Aaron's shoulder, letting his eyes drop closed for a moment. "Missed this," he mumbled.

"Me too," Aaron breathed back, kissing Dave's forehead.

It wasn't _just_ the sex Dave had missed. He'd missed knowing Aaron was there. He'd missed sleeping next to Aaron, knowing that they both understood the nightmares. He'd missed feeling like Aaron showed him a side of himself no one else would ever see. Dave fumbled behind him for some tissues and cleaned them up enough that he could relax better against Aaron. He didn't want to move, the alcohol and orgasm draining his body of all energy.

"Thanks," Aaron mumbled. This felt too good to move. He didn't want to move either, even if his rational mind was starting to kick back in slowly and tell him he shouldn't stay. Aaron sighed and wrapped his arms around Dave.

"Mm-hmm." Dave moved closer, draping an arm across Aaron's stomach and pressing his face against Aaron's neck. _Don't go_ , he hoped silently. _Stay with me_.

Aaron smiled softly and tilted his head to press his cheek to Dave's hair. "Are you feeling better?" he murmured.

Dave laughed, the sound muffled against Aaron's skin. "Feel a hell of a lot better," he murmured. "Still pretty drunk."

Aaron snorted and shook his head. "Mmm, I should have waited."

Dave kissed Aaron's neck and then rested his head on Aaron's shoulder. "No, this was exactly what I needed," he said. "But I wasn't exactly expecting it, which is why I turned to the scotch before you got here." His voice was warm, probably too warm. He couldn't be bothered to care just now.

"Still..." Aaron breathed. He reached up to brush his fingers through Dave's hair, not really wanting to stop touching.

"Don't second-guess yourself," Dave murmured. He smiled at the touch of Aaron's fingers. "You made me feel better. In a lot of ways." _You made me happy._

"I'm glad... Just seems like it should have happened a different way after all those years," Aaron said, and then hoped Dave didn't take it the wrong way. A moment later, he realized that statement blatantly reflected how much importance Aaron was assigning to him and Dave having sex again, and he felt impossibly more naked than he was.

Dave's smile widened and he lifted his hand to curl around Aaron's, pulling it down so he could kiss the inside of Aaron's wrist. "It was perfect," he murmured. "And this way I'll have someone here to make me coffee in the morning when I'm grumpy and hung over." He hoped he would, anyway.

God, this was far more intimate than Aaron had planned for, but it felt good. Frighteningly good. Aaron lifted his eyebrows when Dave finished, and hesitated. He should say that he should go home. To his empty house and his empty bed, away from Dave's comforting arms. "Okay," he breathed. He hesitated for another long moment, then decided that Dave already knew this was important to him, so he asked what he was thinking. "You'll remember this?" he said, his voice soft.

Dave relaxed as soon as Aaron agreed. He shifted closer and kissed Aaron's jaw. "I'm not anywhere near that drunk," he murmured warmly, and stroked his fingertips across Aaron's chest. He settled down again with his forehead against Aaron's cheek, grateful that the evening seemed to have removed some of Aaron's hesitance. _I could never forget this_ , he thought as he closed his eyes again.

Aaron nodded and pressed his cheek against Dave a little more, letting his sated body fall a little more towards sleep.

*****

It took Aaron a moment to realize where he was when he woke up. It wasn't his house and it wasn't a hotel, and there was a warm body curled up at his side. A body that was too broad and an arm that was too heavy to have been Haley's.

_Oh_.

Aaron smiled before he could stop himself, before the weight of fear settled in his stomach. God, this was too fast. What happened to waiting? To taking this slowly? To figuring out who he was on his own before jumping into bed with Dave?

Aaron's smile slipped, but he planted a gentle kiss on Dave's forehead before carefully extricating himself from the bed in hopes of not waking Dave. He wasn't sure if it worked or not, but if Dave had woken, he'd fallen right back to sleep.

_Hung over. God, what did I do?_ Aaron thought, and then pulled on his boxers and undershirt so he could pad down the hallway to the kitchen to make coffee. He wasn't hungry--his stomach was clenching; maybe there was something to people telling him he needed to learn to relax--so he sat at the kitchen table, drinking his coffee and trying to sort things out.

Dave woke up alone, which sent a chill through him, but when he rolled over, he saw Aaron's clothes draped on a chair, so he relaxed again. His head was throbbing, but he didn't really care at the moment. Aaron had stayed. They might have taken things further last night than he'd meant to, but he wasn't running away from it.

After a few minutes, Dave climbed gingerly out of bed and pulled on his boxers, then took his robe from where it was hanging inside the closet. After a quick trip to the bathroom, he headed out to the kitchen, following the smell of coffee.

The sight of Aaron Hotchner leaning over a cup of coffee at his kitchen table was well worth getting up for. Dave smiled and went to pour himself a cup. "Morning."

"Morning," Aaron returned. Dave was sort of adorable in his robe, looking groggy. Aaron sighed. "How do you feel?"

"Good. Head hurts." Dave sat across from him and leaned on the table, looking up at him. "You?"

"I'm fine," Aaron said, then stood and started going through cabinets. "I don't know where you keep painkillers," he said after not finding anything in the first few places he looked.

"Cabinet between the sink and the stove," Dave said. "With the spices." He shifted to watch Aaron rummaging through his cabinets. It looked good, _right_ , for Aaron to be here like this.

Aaron found the Tylenol and wandered back to the table to hand it to Dave. He waited while Dave tapped a couple pills into his hand and then took the bottle back to the cabinet. "I can't guarantee that I won't burn anything, but I can attempt breakfast."

Dave swallowed the pills, then smiled at Aaron. "I have waffles in the freezer. You know how to operate a toaster, you can manage those. But I seem to recall your having more skill in the kitchen than you let on."

Aaron smiled. "Haley was a better cook than I ever was, and she was home more often. I haven't gotten a lot of practice in the last... decade or so." He went to the freezer and pulled out the box of waffles, then went looking for syrup.

"Shit, we might end up starving together," Dave said, amused. He sipped his coffee, enjoying the sight of Aaron Hotchner in his underclothes. Just now, despite being hung over, life seemed pretty damn good.

Aaron smiled. "I have a freezer full in my garage and lots of canned goods," he said. He held a sigh; they were talking about this like they were a couple. He dropped a couple of waffles in the toaster. "How dark do you like them?"

"Just hot, not browned," Dave replied. "Plates are over the sink." He ought to get up and help, but just now he was inclined to let Aaron take care of him. He had a feeling it wouldn't last too long, anyway.

Aaron nodded and finished making then both breakfast silently before settling at the table. "I should probably go in later," he murmured. Part of him knew he just wanted to get some distance. "JJ will probably have the Galen waiting papers on my desk, and I need to finish up my report on Hartwick."

Dave nodded. "How did that go, by the way? Reid said it was pretty uneventful." On any other day he would get on Aaron for going in on the weekend, but he had a feeling this was more about getting away from Dave for a while than it was going in to work.

"I told you I threatened to beat him up." Aaron glanced at Dave, then took a sip of his coffee and reached for the syrup. "His intent was to toy with us."

Dave frowned. "I'd forgotten about that. How the hell did it come to that, Aaron?" Of course, Dave suspected it was because Aaron was under so much stress. But it would be nice if Aaron actually realized it himself--and admitted it to him.

Aaron shook his head, but didn't say anything for a long moment. "It wasn't my finest moment," he admitted. "Though he _did_ threaten to kill us, and I knew Reid would go the opposite direction, so..." He shrugged and hid his frown in his coffee cup.

Dave sighed. "You're working too hard," he said quietly. "You know, you won't be doing anyone any favors if you work yourself into the ground. And trying to distract yourself from a marriage falling apart isn't going to work in the long run."

Aaron looked up and frowned at Dave for a moment, and then just turned his attention back to his waffles. "I'm not distracting myself. I'm well aware of what's going on in my personal life."

"Okay," Dave said, and sipped his coffee. He wasn't entirely convinced, but he was willing to take Aaron's word for it.

"And besides, my marriage isn't falling apart; it's over." Aaron suddenly felt a little too defensive. He drew a deep breath and looked at Dave's plate. "Are you finished?"

Dave looked up and nodded, but when Aaron reached for his plate, Dave caught his hand and held it. "Aaron, whatever the reason, you work too hard." His lips curved slightly. "My project for the year is going to be getting you to relax from time to time."

"I'm relaxed when I'm with you," Aaron said. Of course, he wasn't relaxed right now, but Dave was pushing.

"Then maybe my project will be getting you to spend more time with me," Dave teased, his lips curving more. He rubbed his thumb over Aaron's fingers.

"I spend a lot of time with you," Aaron said, but his voice softened a little at the way Dave was looking at him.

"Well, you should. I'm apparently good for your health." Dave squeezed Aaron's hand gently and let go.

Aaron drew a deep breath and then got up to put the dishes in the sink. "Except that you often drive me completely crazy, as well," he said, smiling. He walked back over and grabbed his coffee cup, then leaned over to kiss Dave's forehead on his way out of the kitchen.

"Yeah, well, likewise," Dave muttered, but he was smiling.


	9. Chapter 9

It seemed odd to Dave when he put his hand in his jeans pocket and _didn't_ feel the bracelet. He'd put it back in its case, a sort of symbolic laying to rest. It felt right, but occasionally he still caught himself thinking about the Galen kids and then having to remind himself that the case had been solved.

Fortunately, work kept him occupied as they chased down their angel of death in Pittsburgh. He found himself more absorbed in the work than usual, as Aaron appeared to have withdrawn from him entirely. He couldn't pretend it didn't hurt, but he kept telling himself things had just happened too fast, and Aaron would be back to normal soon.

Except soon turned into eventually while they dealt with cases in Texas and then Miami. When the day rolled around that Dave and Aaron had to leave for their conference in Boston, he wasn't sure whether he was relieved to be getting away from the rest of the team for a while, or dreading the idea of an entire trip bereft of distractions. If Aaron was going to be strictly hands-off for the whole week, Dave was probably going to go crazy.

It wasn't really a problem that they had been booked two separate rooms. The problem for Aaron was that he wasn't sure how he was supposed to behave. It was easy enough to not be tempted to find his way to Dave's room when there was always the possibility that the other team members might see, but now... well, there was no excuse to be standoffish other than the one he knew he and Dave were _both_ aware of: Aaron was panicking.

He somehow doubted that Dave was overly impressed by that excuse, but it was the truth, regardless of how much Aaron hated to admit it.

He wondered if they might need to talk about what was going on, but when they got to the hotel, neither of them said a word and went straight to their rooms. Aaron was unpacked quickly, after which he settled on his bed and stared at the ceiling, willing himself not to think about Dave in the next room. Which didn't work, really, except that the constant mantra in his head kept him occupied until they had to go down and give their seminar.

The seminar went well, Dave thought. No matter what a mess their personal life was in at the moment, he and Aaron made a damn good team professionally. They fielded a short question-and-answer session afterward, and then they were on their own for the afternoon. Dave watched Aaron out of the corner of his eye as they were packing up their notes, and thought that several more days of this would be completely unacceptable.

"Want to get some dinner?" he suggested as they left the conference.

Aaron glanced up at Dave, the calm easiness he'd been feeling while he was at work with Dave settling into the familiar guilt he was feeling when he and Dave were alone together. God, he was being such a bastard. "Yeah," he murmured.

Dave nodded. "What do you feel like? Italian? Chinese? Seafood?" He headed for the elevator. "I want to drop this off in the room before we head out anywhere."

Aaron looked at the notes in Dave's hands and followed him. "Sure," he said softly, then leaned against the elevator wall. "I'm really fine with anything. Seafood?"

"Sounds good. Feel like lobster?" Dave gave Aaron a sly look, hoping it would make him laugh instead of tensing up.

Aaron's lips curled a bit, and he glanced sideways at Dave. "If you're buying."

Dave grinned. "Why is it everyone always thinks I'm made of money? I had to buy a round of _scotch_ for the team in Indianapolis. The good shit, too, because the place I was staying doesn't have anything less." He looked over at Aaron. "I'll buy if you call the front desk and get a restaurant recommendation for us."

Aaron nodded, feeling tentatively better. "Fair enough. And I think they think you're made of money _because_ you stay in places like that." He turned to smile at Dave. Really, neither one of them would have any trouble buying dinner and then some, but it was nice to play a bit.

Dave laughed. "Well, you know, if I'm not sleeping on the Bureau's dime, I want to pick a place with nice beds and enough water pressure. And brass rails and cherry wood in the bar, and a jacket requirement in the restaurant, and..." He trailed off, shrugging. "You know. The simple things in life." The elevator came to a stop and he stepped out.

Aaron chuckled and shook his head, following Dave and looking away when he found his eyes wandering--they were _always_ wandering lately. "Of course," he said. "I'll meet you downstairs." He headed towards his own room.

Dave left his notes on the desk in his room and made a stop in the bathroom, then paused, inspecting his reflection. After a minute of deliberation he decided to lose the tie and keep the jacket. A moment later he told himself it was ridiculous to worry over his clothes, especially when it felt like a major victory that Aaron had agreed to have dinner with him at all. He sighed, splashed some water on his face and patted it dry, and headed back down to the lobby.

Aaron was waiting for Dave in the lobby, and he smiled when Dave walked up to him. "There's a place not too far from here that's supposed to be good."

"Excellent." Dave smiled back. "Lead on."

It didn't take very long for them to get to the restaurant, and they settled at a table. Aaron ordered a bottle of wine for them, then wondered if he should have. Then told himself he was being ridiculous; they both drank wine; the bottle wasn't that expensive. Aaron hated the way he was suddenly questioning his every move around Dave. "JJ thinks we have a new case. She's presenting it to the team tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? I guess we've been voted off the island," Dave said, looking amused. He sipped his wine, taking time to appreciate it. "Spencer was telling me that they worked a case without you or Gideon earlier this year."

Aaron raised an eyebrow, and then his lips curled slightly. "Mostly. Without me or Emily, actually."

Dave nodded. "He seemed to think Strauss was instrumental in keeping the two of you out of it."

Aaron drew in a breath and nodded at their waitress when she came to take their orders. Once she left, Aaron sat back in his seat. "Do you want the long version or the short version?"

"Long version," Dave said, because maybe Aaron would get involved in the story and relax a little more. He seemed edgy, and it was wearing Dave out.

Aaron took a long drink of his wine and then topped off both of their glasses. "Just after Gideon's friend was murdered, he was struggling." Aaron shook his head. "Strauss thought I wanted her job, decided someone had to take the blame for an unfortunate end to a case, and I took responsibility."

"You wouldn't like her job. Not enough hands-on work. She should've known that." Dave shook his head. "So I presume she maneuvered you into an impossible situation."

"She suspended me," Aaron said. "Two weeks. Then she tried to use Emily to find reason to fire me. Haley called my suspension a 'blessing in disguise'; I put in for a transfer, and Emily resigned." It was almost amusing now that it was over and there was very little doubt that Aaron and Prentiss weren't going anywhere, and Aaron found himself smiling.

"A blessing in disguise." Dave scowled. "I always knew Strauss was ambitious, but I had no idea she'd resort to such low tactics. So how did you end up getting the better of her?"

Aaron took another drink. "Garcia handed me the case file and held up transfers and resignations in the system, Morgan kept me posted, and I tracked down Emily and flew us out to help. Technically, we were still employed with the BAU, and we were able to show Strauss exactly why the team needed to stay intact." He shifted in his seat and sighed. "And when I got home, Haley was gone," he added, his smile slipping.

Dave looked down at the table, his expression blanking. "Ah." He cleared his throat and looked back up. "So the team saved you, and you saved the team."

Aaron looked at Dave for a long moment, wondering if that was true. It wasn't his team's fault that Aaron had left his home that night, but they had pushed, and that single decision had sent his personal life into a downward spiral. He didn't blame them in the least, however, because he knew he would have been miserable anywhere but the BAU in the long run. He was quiet for a little too long, and he swallowed hard. "I don't know," he said.

Dave sat up and reached across the table, resting his hand lightly on Aaron's. "You wouldn't have been happy leaving the BAU, and this team couldn't do without you," he said quietly. He hoped he didn't sound insensitive, but he knew it was the truth.

"Oh, but you're here," Aaron said as lightly as he could manage. "They would have been fine." Aaron turned his hand and gave Dave's a squeeze, then pulled away. "But you're right about the first part."

Dave shook his head. "I'm no replacement for you," he said, "even if we're an excellent team." He shrugged and sat back, reaching for his glass. "So Strauss hasn't given you any trouble since then?"

Aaron shook his head. "No, she's left me be." His knee brushed Dave's under the table. "I think she earned a whole new respect for what we do too."

"Good." Dave smiled faintly at him and sipped his wine. This seemed more relaxed than their interactions had in the last few weeks. Maybe Aaron was settling down again.

It felt good to touch Dave again, so Aaron left his leg where it was. It was innocent enough. Their casual conversation was relaxing Aaron, even if he was still confused. He nodded his thanks when their waitress brought their food, and started into his fish. 

They ate with just incidental conversation, nothing serious or stressful. Dave felt himself relaxing as Aaron did, which was nice. He'd spent too much time lately worried about saying or doing the wrong thing. It was a strange edge that their relationship had never had before, and he'd been getting frustrated. When the waitress came around to see if they wanted dessert, Dave ordered a slice of chocolate cherry cake and glanced at Aaron.

Aaron considered saying no for a moment, but then their waitress mentioned tiramisu and he ordered that instead. He wondered if they needed to talk about what was going to happen once they got back to the hotel. He was fairly certain if they went back to a room together, it would be far too tempting to wind up in bed together again.

Dave got the check when they were done, and took a moment to finish his glass of wine, since Aaron was driving. He was feeling pleasantly warmed, both by the wine and the casual touching, and followed Aaron out to the car.

Aaron glanced at Dave as he slipped into the SUV, and the drive to the hotel was quiet but comfortable. When they were riding up in the elevator, Aaron finally asked what he'd been thinking. He'd been avoiding the subject for too long already, several cases had come and gone, and it may have been a little late, but Dave at least deserved to know Aaron wasn't planning to walk away from him. He just needed time. Space. "Do we need to talk?"

"We can if you want," Dave said, still relaxed enough that he thought he sounded open. He wondered what Aaron wanted to say, and hoped it wouldn't ruin the good feeling he had tonight.

Aaron drew in a breath. "That wasn't exactly what I asked," he said, but his tone was gentle. He looked over at Dave. "I'm not putting an end to this, to us," he said. "Just a pause."

It hadn't actually crossed Dave's mind that Aaron might be ending it. It was strange how the reassurance now made a flash of anxiety go through him. His eyes widened slightly as he glanced at Aaron, then he put his hands in his pockets and looked up at the numbers, watching them climb higher. "Okay."

Dave sounded... somehow blank when he replied. It wasn't what Aaron had expected in the least, and he'd hoped for more that a one word answer. Aaron watched him for a moment, his lips parting, and then he just sucked in a breath and followed Dave's gaze to the numbers.

The silence dragged out, and as the doors swished open, Dave sighed. "I wasn't aware that was a possibility," he said finally.

"It's not. I thought you might think that was what I was doing," Aaron said, and followed Dave out of the elevator.

Dave glanced over at him. "I figured you were panicking," he said frankly. "So I thought maybe some space was in order."

Aaron nodded, frowning. He didn't like the idea that anyone might think he was _panicking_ , but he also couldn't really argue, either.

"I'm trying not to be insensitive, for once in my life," Dave said. "But frankly it's been getting a little frustrating, having you hardly talk to me at all." They reached his room and he paused, looking at Aaron again. "Want to come in for a while?"

"I _talk_ to you plenty, Dave," Aaron said, but he couldn't disguise the sudden defensive tone in his voice. He sighed. "I probably shouldn't. I might do something I shouldn't do and frustrate you more."

Dave frowned at him. "Hey, this is not an argument, okay? I just would appreciate a little more communication. On a personal level, not work-related." He touched Aaron's elbow lightly. "Just come inside for a while. I'll even let you watch the news." He gave Aaron a crooked smile.

"You're too kind," Aaron said, but felt a little better, if apprehensive. He looked back at Dave, then lifted his hand to return the touch. "Okay. For a little while."

Dave's smile widened and he went inside, hoping the evening wouldn't end on a sour note. "I'll behave myself," he murmured. "You want a drink? I put a couple of bottles of water in the fridge, or there's a mini-bar. Or teabags."

There weren't many places to sit in the room, just a chair and the bed, and Aaron wondered how uncomfortable sitting on the bed with Dave would be... or if it would be more uncomfortable if he obviously avoided it. "I'll have whatever you're having."

Dave nodded and started heating water for tea, since he knew Aaron liked it. When he had enough to fill two cups, he carried them over and handed one to Aaron.

Aaron couldn't help but smile. Dave probably wouldn't have had the tea if he was just drinking by himself, and it sort of made Aaron want to kiss him... which was exactly why he had been afraid to come inside in the first place. "Thanks," he murmured, then opted for the chair near the bed.

Dave nodded and settled on the bed, smiling back at Aaron. "I don't mind giving you the time and space you need," he began, and then paused. "I understand why, you know? But I'd like it if you'd keep me in the loop, so to speak." He looked down at his tea and blew on it idly.

"I wasn't trying to cut you out," Aaron said. "I'm just trying to be cautious."

Dave nodded again. He'd always felt like he could talk to Aaron about anything, if necessary, but he didn't _enjoy_ talking about their relationship these days, really. Some things didn't need much discussion. He sipped at his tea and didn't say anything.

Aaron fell silent too, and the quiet sounds of the ten o'clock news filled the room for the next hour. Eventually, Aaron started to get tired, and he took his and Dave's empty cups back to the bathroom sink. He'd already stayed a little longer then he'd meant to, but the silence had grown comfortable. When he came back out, he gave Dave a small smile. "I should probably go. We have an early morning."

"Yeah." Dave stood and flipped off the TV, wandering toward the door. "Sweet dreams," he said, giving Aaron a small smile. He had to push down the urge to move close enough to put his arms around Aaron. Everything about them felt right, except this part, where Aaron was leaving. He held in a sigh.

Aaron breathed a laughed and reached out to touch Dave's arm. "Honestly, if you're not careful, I might be forced to tell people how nice you can be."

Dave shook his head. "You do that, and you'll find out how mean I really am," he muttered. Since Aaron had touched him first, he moved a little closer, then eyed him. "I'm going to kiss you unless you leave now."

Aaron didn't stop smiling. They could do that. It wasn't too much or too far, and there was no denying they both still wanted each other. Aaron moved a little closer. "I'm not leaving."

"Good," Dave murmured, and slid an arm around Aaron's waist. He leaned in, smiling faintly, and pressed his mouth lightly to Aaron's, letting Aaron have control of the kiss.

Aaron had to hold in a little noise of surrender as he let himself release whatever it was he was holding onto. He slipped his arms around Dave's shoulders, his fingers running through Dave's hair, then drew his tongue along Dave's lower lip, his kiss slowly inviting.

Dave hummed faintly, wrapping his other arm around Aaron and letting him deepen the kiss. He hadn't intended to push, but if Aaron wanted this, no way in hell was Dave going to argue.

Aaron drew a deep breath and deepened the kiss a little more, but when his body started to become interested in what he was doing, he pulled back with a few light, teasing kisses. He brushed his nose against Dave's. "Mmph... I should go," he whispered, but didn't move right away.

"Mm-hmm." Dave inhaled deeply and pressed his face against Aaron's neck. It felt so good to have Aaron in his arms. He relaxed slightly against Aaron.

Aaron closed his eyes, smiling faintly, then turned his head to kiss Dave's temple before pulling away. "Night," he murmured.

"Good night." Dave waited for him to go, then locked the door behind him. He went to bed feeling a lot better about life in general.

*****

It occurred to Dave that he was getting used to the team thing when he caught himself thinking how strange it was to have Aaron and Spencer out in Roanoke testifying on the Matloff case while the rest of the team was back in Quantico. Still, it did give him some time on his own to figure out where things were going. He wasn't sure what the future was going to bring, but what he knew for certain was that it would include Aaron, no matter what the cost. They'd been put on hiatus, as Aaron phrased it, once; Dave wasn't going to let that happen again.

He treated the rest of the team to dinner one night, where Emily and Derek amused him by trying to get details from JJ about her relationship, while Dave amused himself by taking her side and telling them personal relationships ought to stay personal. He could feel JJ getting more perplexed as he continued to defend her, and had a feeling she knew both about his own history as well as his accidental discovery of Penelope's relationship.

Things were coming together, and for the first time in a long time, Dave felt like he was really where he was supposed to be.

For all that he liked the team, though, he was glad when the Roanoke case was over and Aaron was back at Quantico.

It was funny working on a case that felt so long since past. It had only been a few years ago, but so much had changed--the entire landscape of the team. Even the team members that were still on the team were different, and Reid was a perfect example. Four years ago, Reid might not have been able to stop Darcy's dad from shooting Matloff.

When the case was over, Hotch couldn't help but feel a sizzle of pride for his team, the way they pulled together a case that might have been dead otherwise, and especially for Reid, not just for how much he'd grown as a profiler, but as a person too.

It was late when Hotch and Reid got back to Quantico, but Reid seemed more settled than he had in a while after giving Darcy's father back her watch, and the drive home had been quiet. After they dropped off their paperwork at the BAU, Hotch gave Reid a small squeeze to his shoulder as they headed out, and then pulled out his cell phone to call Dave on his way to the car. He didn't say hello, he just smiled and launched right into what he was thinking when Dave's phone clicked on.

"I would have been miserable leaving the BAU," he murmured.

Dave grinned. "Hello to you, too," he teased. "Yeah, you would have been. You're too damn good at this."

"I'm only one part of this team," Aaron said, clicking open his car and getting inside. "You're awake."

"Yeah, some jerk's got me hooked on watching the ten o'clock news," Dave griped, but he was still grinning. "You had dinner?"

Aaron laughed softly. "Mmm, not really. Drive through food didn't sound all that satisfying."

Dave got up from the couch and wandered to the kitchen. "I can offer you...um, omelets or spaghetti. And some nice red, or some kind of green tea, if you're interested."

"Oh? Developed a sudden taste for tea?" Aaron asked, but he knew perfectly well that Dave had the tea for him, so he let it drop quickly. "Spaghetti and wine sound good. And maybe the _eleven o'clock_ news?" he teased. "I'll be over in a bit."

"It'll be the same stuff I already watched," Dave said. "See you soon." They hung up and he started the water heating. He'd eaten two hours ago, but he'd rather cook for Aaron and have him come over than make him go home alone. Not to mention he'd just plain _missed_ Aaron. By the time he heard Aaron's knock at the door, Dave had dinner ready and the wine breathing, and was setting the table.

Aaron stepped inside and smiled at Dave, and then said without preamble, "Reid stopped Darcy's father from shooting Matloff."

"That had to feel good. I hope it helps him." Dave shut the door and laughed as Shithead came trotting over to greet Aaron.

"Hello, cat. I see you," Aaron said, looking down as Shithead curled around his ankles. He gently nudged it away after a moment. "It smells good."

"I have garlic toast to go with the pasta," Dave said, turning towards the kitchen. He said, over his shoulder, "It's good to see you." Hopefully it would sound more casual that way.

Aaron smiled and followed. "You know, you did see me occasionally this week." He couldn't help feeling warmed. I felt good knowing someone was looking forward to seeing him at the end of the day.

Dave waved a hand. "You know what I mean." He carried the spaghetti to the table and waited for Aaron to sit.

Aaron settled at the table and held out his empty glass for Dave to fill. "Thanks," he murmured. Really, anything would look good to eat right about now, but Dave actually cooking for Aaron was a nice surprise.

Dave poured them both a glass of wine and settled down across from Aaron. "How did your part of the trial go?"

"It went well," Aaron said. "I'd be lying if I said there wasn't a small part of me that still enjoys being in the courtroom."

"Well, of course you do," Dave replied. "You were a damn good prosecutor, and you're a damn good expert witness. Not to mention, how many times have we caught the bad guy, only to have a flaw in the court case get him off? It's nice to help put them away for good."

"Better to catch them," Aaron said, grinning at Dave for a moment.

"Definitely better." Dave reached out to take Aaron's hand, warmed by that grin. "How's the wine?"

"It's good," Aaron said, nodding and trying to ignore the little surge of _something_ that Dave's touch sent through him. He hadn't meant to open this door again when he'd kissed Dave, but he stubbornly refused to close himself off again after that.

Dave nodded and picked at his spaghetti. He wasn't really all that hungry, but he didn't want Aaron to know he'd cooked just for him, so he'd taken a little anyway. A small silence fell over the table, but Dave enjoyed it, feeling companionable. It was _nice_ having Aaron here.

When they were finished eating (and 'eating' could have been used loosely in the case of Dave, who picked, and Aaron knew this was all for him, but kept quiet), Aaron helped clean up the kitchen. It felt a little too domestic, but nice anyway.

Aaron made coffee and tried to pull out some work to do (he could have done it at home, but even the quiet companionship was nice), but Dave dragged him to the couch upon threats of bodily injury, and Aaron couldn't help but laugh and follow.

Dave didn't bother flipping on the TV, though he did put the radio on a classical station, turned low. He sat on the couch and pulled Aaron into his arms, grateful that Aaron allowed it. Dave didn't want to push, but he wanted Aaron close, wanted the intimacy of holding and being held. He pressed his nose lightly to Aaron's neck and closed his eyes, taking slow, deep breaths. They sat like that so long in near silence that Dave found himself drifting as he got sleepy.

Aaron had been reluctant, but he stubbornly refused to shut Dave out again like he had before, and after a long while the warmth of Dave's embrace relaxed him. This was almost too good, too real, and it was frightening. He didn't want to think this was just him trying to soothe his other pains.

Dave's breathing started to deepen after a while, and Aaron closed his eyes too, listening to the steady breaths as they huffed softly against his neck. And then, without forethought, he stroked his fingers through Dave's hair to wake him gently. "You should go to bed," he whispered.

Dave took a long, deep breath, forcing himself to wake up a little. "You could come, too," he murmured, and kissed Aaron's neck. He smiled, his eyes still closed. "Just to sleep. I'm not just interested in one thing."

"My potted plants might miss me," Aaron murmured, smiling softly and turning his head to kiss Dave. "I'm testing the theory that they grow better when you talk to them."

"Didn't know you had any potted plants," Dave murmured. He kissed Aaron again, wishing he would stay, but not unhappy. It didn't feel like a rejection.

"Haley left them. Can't bring myself to let them die." Aaron kissed Dave again, a little slower this time, and then shifted back. "I'll tuck you in, though," he said, giving Dave a small smile.

Dave chuckled and just studied him for a long moment. He lifted a hand to brush along Aaron's cheekbone. "You're beautiful, you know that?" he murmured, and leaned in for a brief kiss.

Aaron sucked in a breath. He was used to Dave saying things like that, but not usually like this, and it was unexpected enough to send a thrill through him. "Dave," he whispered, and kissed Dave again. "So are you."

Dave snorted softly, but didn't argue. He stole another kiss, then leaned back and sighed. "I need to get to bed," he said regretfully.

Aaron sighed and stood, tugging Dave up from the couch, then threaded his fingers into Dave's hair. He didn't really want to go, but he knew he should. He pulled Dave to him and kissed him before letting him go.

"You really don't have to leave," Dave murmured, keeping his arms around Aaron even after Aaron had let go. "The plants would probably be okay for one night."

"I know," Aaron said. He leaned in and pressed his cheek to Dave's, running his hands up Dave's upper arms when Dave didn't let go. "I'm supposed to be figuring out how to be alone," he reminded Dave. And as it went, this was really the most backwards way to do it he could think of, but it was a little late for that.

Dave sighed. "Yeah. Sorry." He closed his eyes for a moment, then kissed Aaron and stepped back. "You're right, you should go."

"I'll see you tomorrow," Aaron said softly, squeezing Dave's hand a bit before he let Dave move away completely. He started towards the door. "Night."

"Good night," Dave said quietly. He locked the door behind Aaron and went back to his bedroom with a sigh. He knew Aaron's leaving wasn't a rejection, but sometimes he thought maybe Aaron was blind when it came to their relationship. He'd _always_ been himself, just _himself_ , with Dave.

Dave just hoped Aaron would realize it soon.


	10. Chapter 10

New York was a struggle that never got any easier. First they couldn't keep up, then the team was falling apart, with Morgan throwing a very public fit. More unsubs, more shootings, more playing mediator between an old friend and a trusted team member.

And when Aaron finally started to feel like he was at least regaining control of the team, everything clouded over again in a haze of pain and confusion when he was blown across a city street by an explosion. He didn't stop, though. He refused to stop, and when his body _forced_ him to stop in the hospital, when he'd finally gotten Kate to safety and then collapsed, he was angry--angry because he couldn't do it all, and that much was becoming readily apparent.

Dave and Aaron had reached the same conclusion about the bomb at nearly the same moment; Dave had seen the guilt flash through Aaron's eyes and a part of him had ached for Aaron even as they headed for the security center of the hospital and then chased Morgan through the hospital. Dave took the lead, letting Reid cover him. Aaron was limping as they ran through the hospital, and their failure to stop the terrorist from setting off the bomb or killing himself just added to the air of defeat around him. Kate's death... Dave hadn't known her, but he'd liked her well enough, in spite of her physical resemblance to Haley.

When they got back to their hotel at the end of it all, Dave let the others get ahead of them while he fell back to walk with Aaron.

Aaron was frowning so deeply it hurt... but then everything hurt, so maybe it had nothing to do with his frown. He hadn't been able to save Kate, he'd driven the bomb directly to the hospital himself, he'd nearly been killed, Morgan had just _run off_ with the fucking ambulance without a word to anyone but Garcia. And now Aaron was limping and in pain on top of it all. He felt sick, and he wasn't even sure how much of that was physical and how much was mental and emotional.

He looked over at Dave, not meeting Dave's gaze, and then back ahead of him as they headed down the hall towards his room. "Not in the mood," he muttered.

"Gee, and seeing you bloody and limping really got me hot," Dave said, sarcasm creeping into his voice because arguing Aaron into it was easier than persuading him nicely.

"Dave. Don't." Aaron slid the key into his room door and went inside, but he didn't bother to stop Dave. He didn't feel like arguing. It would have been easier to tell Dave to fuck off if Dave wasn't being sarcastic, but he had a feeling Dave knew that.

Once the door clicked shut, Aaron didn't bother to go far. He just slumped against the wall by the door with a groan when his back hit, and closed his eyes.

Dave sighed and bolted the door, then went over to pull Aaron into his arms and away from the wall. "Don't do this, Aaron."

_God_. Aaron really didn't want to do this. Still, his arms went automatically around Dave, and he pressed his face to Dave's shoulder, trying to suppress the wave of emotion that hit him, or at least not have Dave _see_ it. So much of this could have been prevented if Aaron had been better, and Kate was dead because he couldn't do anything to save her. "Dave," he managed, his voice shaking.

Dave tightened his arms, holding Aaron and not saying anything. There wasn't anything to say. It wasn't all right, and it wouldn't be all right for a while. It wasn't Aaron's fault, but it wouldn't do any good to say it. And Aaron knew Dave loved him, and they had both felt awkward when Dave had actually spoken those words out loud. Dave kissed Aaron's hair and held him as tightly as they could stand.

"God," Aaron choked, and then wasn't able to suppress the sob that followed. It felt wrong to be doing this, so wrong it was frightening, and he had the fleeting thought that he'd really rather be blown up again than break down in someone else's arms. He bit down hard and pushed his hands between them, against Dave's chest. "I don't want to do this," he whispered desperately.

"Don't be an idiot," Dave snapped, not letting go. He kissed Aaron's temple, his lips soothing the sting of his words. "You're going to fall apart sometime, and if you don't do it now, it'll be worse later."

Aaron actually laughed at that, a tired, mournful laugh, and then just curled his fingers into the front of Dave's shirt. "I think living through another blast would be less painful." He sniffed hard.

"I know," Dave murmured. He tightened his arms briefly, then loosened them a little, suddenly remembering Aaron's injuries. He didn't let go of Aaron, though. He couldn't. _It could have been you_ , he thought, and his breath caught in his throat for just a moment. He opened his mouth to speak, then couldn't think of anything.

Aaron slid his hands back around Dave again when Dave loosened his grip and pressed his face to Dave's neck. He knew Dave would feel the wetness, and part of him was ashamed of it, but it was starting to hit him that there wasn't a single other person he could even do this with. He pressed his hands more firmly against Dave's back when he realized they were trembling. "I drove the damn thing to the hospital myself," he managed. "I got the gurney out of the back, and I didn't even... _see_. I--"

"And if you hadn't, she'd have bled to death in the street," Dave said quietly. "You at least gave her that much dignity. You gave her a fighting chance." He wondered vaguely if Aaron had touched his minibar at all since getting here. He would need a stiff drink and a hot bath when this was over.

"It was an arterial bleed, Dave. She didn't--" Aaron clenched his jaw a moment, but the fresh tears came anyway. "She told me to leave, and if I'd left--" _The bomb wouldn't have gotten to the hospital_. "It would have at least been a quick death." The idea of leaving her to die alone on the street made Aaron ill, though, even now, and he sucked in a shaky breath.

"And she would have died alone," Dave replied. "Whatever else happened, she knew you cared enough about her to risk your own life staying. You were a comfort to her." At least, Dave suspected Kate Joyner had loved Aaron, and he knew that in her place, he would have been comforted by having Aaron refuse to leave.

Aaron shook his head against Dave's neck. He hadn't risked his life. He was fine; he'd, at least, been able to get back up after the blast. He didn't say any of that, though, he just fell silent, stroking his fingers against Dave's back because, as guilty as he felt about it, it _did_ feel good to be reminded he was alive. After the little tremors started to passed, Aaron blew out a gusty breath. "I think she was trying to comfort me," he said, his voice coming out blank.

"Tell me," Dave murmured. He could understand that, too. She would have known that it wasn't Aaron's fault. She would have known Aaron needed to survive so they could solve the case. She would have wanted Aaron to be all right.

Aaron pulled back, but didn't let go. He couldn't quite look at Dave though, so he stared at the wall behind him. "I kept telling her to stay with me, that she was going to be okay... and she kept trying to get me to understand that she wasn't." His voice had flattened and his expression was placid now--he felt exhausted suddenly--but wetness rolled down his cheeks anyway. "I just wouldn't listen to her."

"You didn't want to lose her," Dave said. He lifted one hand to stroke through Aaron's hair, then down his neck to rub a shoulder. "She just wanted you to be all right."

"I'm not," Aaron whispered, then stubbornly wiped at his face, feeling as though his chest had gone hollow. "I need to lie down."

"Mm." Dave kissed him softly. "You need a bath." He nudged gently at Aaron, trying to guide him toward the bathroom.

Aaron groaned, and let Dave guide him, because it was easier than having to make decisions for himself. "I don't feel like doing anything but sleeping," he complained anyway.

"You'll feel better for it," Dave said, and since Aaron wasn't resisting, he started working on the buttons of Aaron's shirt, so he could drop it on the bathroom floor when they got there. He pressed Aaron down gently to sit on the toilet lid and started the hot water running, then turned back to finish undressing him.

Aaron let Dave pull his shoes and socks off, and then work on his pants, and Aaron couldn't even bring himself to resist. Or help. It occurred to him that he should be feeling or doing _something_ right now, but he just felt suddenly empty.

It was painful to see Aaron so broken. He was too strong, too in control. Dave had seen Aaron in pain before, but this almost seemed unreal. He finished undressing Aaron and checked the water temperature; it was very hot, but not unbearable, so he helped Aaron into the tub and then knelt on the floor next to him.

Aaron hissed at the heat against his leg where the worst of the cuts were. He settled in the water anyway, and once the bruises stopped burning in the heat, it actually felt good. He looked down at himself after a moment and frowned. He hadn't actually taken a moment to look at himself yet, and he looked every bit as battered as he felt. He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, dropping his head back against the tub, and the looked at Dave. "You're going to ruin your knees sitting like that," he said, his voice gravelly.

"I'll be all right," Dave murmured, stroking his fingers through Aaron's hair. The short cut was sort of growing on him, though he missed how easy it used to be to mess up. He brushed his thumb across Aaron's cheek.

Somehow a chill went through Aaron, and he sucked in a sharp breath, and then he relaxed again in the warmth. He closed his eyes and leaned into Dave's touch.

Aaron was right that this wasn't the most comfortable position to be in, but there was no place in the world Dave would rather be. As much as he hated the circumstances, he couldn't deny that it felt good to be needed by Aaron, to be able to do something to help, even if it wasn't much. Eventually he got a washcloth and dabbed gently at Aaron's face, then worked his way down, gently, over Aaron's shoulders, arms, chest and back. It was more for the comfort of it than to actually accomplish any cleaning.

Aaron wasn't sure why the way Dave was taking care of him was making him emotional again, but his defenses were already down. It felt good, and Aaron was relatively sure he shouldn't be able to feel good, to let himself take comfort in this. When he leaned forward to let Dave get to his back, his expression went a little pained as he tried to push back the feeling again. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Stop," he murmured, but he was talking to himself.

Dave stilled his motion, unsure if Aaron was talking to him. "Aaron?" He leaned in a little, tilting his head to try to look Aaron in the face. When Aaron didn't look at him, he lifted his free hand to touch Aaron's jaw, turning his face gently towards him. "Talk to me," Dave whispered, and leaned in to barely brush their lips together.

Aaron returned the kiss, deepening it a little because, in spite of himself, he couldn't help wanting to be reminded that he'd survived. He pulled back and pressed his forehead to Dave's. "I don't want to talk; I just want it to stop."

Dave stroked his hand over Aaron's hair. "You know it isn't going away, Aaron," he murmured.

"I know," Aaron whispered. "But I'm done tonight." He wanted to be done, anyway.

Dave sighed and kissed him again. "I want you to relax in here for a while," he said softly. "I'll be right back." He dipped the washcloth in the hot water again and draped it over Aaron's shoulder for warmth, then got up, swallowing a groan as his knees protested. He went out to the minibar and fixed them both drinks--whiskey neat, double. Then he turned down the bed and turned out all but one light, and took off his shoes and socks. He wasn't going to let Aaron kick him out tonight, no matter what. _God, I could have lost him_ , he thought again, and stubbornly pulled himself together after that shaking thought. They couldn't both fall apart tonight, and Aaron's trauma was much more important.

Once he'd gotten everything as ready as he could, he snagged the complimentary bathrobe off the hanger and went back into the bathroom. "Up," he said, grabbing a towel.

Aaron had slumped back in the bath, draping the washcloth over his forehead and staring at the wall. When Dave came in, he got up, but he was starting to feel like a fool for just letting Dave strip him and put him in the bath. He took the towel and dried himself off. The more 'normal' he started to feel, the more exposed he felt too, so he took the robe next, wrapped himself in it, and started out to the bedroom.

Dave started the tub draining and followed Aaron out of the bathroom, wishing Aaron had taken just a little longer to start coming back to himself. Now Dave would probably have to fight to be allowed to stay. "Drinks on the bedside table," he said, unbuttoning his shirt. Maybe Aaron wouldn't argue if he was mostly naked.

Aaron watched Dave for a moment, and then sighed and sat on the edge of the bed without protesting the fact that Dave obviously intended to stay. He picked up the glass and took a long drink, frowning a little at the way it burned his throat. "Thank you," he murmured.

Dave went over and got his own drink, then sat next to Aaron, letting their shoulders touch. "It's been a hell of a day." He gulped some whiskey and sighed.

"Understatement," Aaron said simply, and tossed back the rest of his drink, setting the glass back on the nightstand.

Dave nodded and didn't say anything else for a minute. "You should be in bed," he murmured, and took another long drink.

"I'm close enough," Aaron said, but he'd just been thinking the same thing anyway. He sighed and didn't bother to go get his boxers and undershirt. He just pull off the robe and got under the covers, then reached a hand up and curled it lightly at Dave's hip.

"I'm not going anywhere," Dave said. "Don't argue with me." He drained his glass and set it aside, turning to look down at Aaron.

Aaron smiled softly, but it didn't feel right on his face. "I didn't want you to."

"I could have lost you today, and I'm not--what?" Dave blinked at him, caught off-guard.

Aaron's smile went a little more genuine, and he tugged lightly at Dave's pants. "I need you." his voice was almost too soft for him to hear.

Dave stared at him for a moment more, then nodded. "Good," he grumbled, and shucked his pants so he could climb in next to Aaron. "It's about damn time you admit that."

Aaron's smile slipped as soon as it came because he just didn't have the energy to maintain it. As soon as Dave was lying next to him, he took Dave's arm and tugged it over him.

Dave snuggled as close as he could get and held Aaron loosely, in deference to his injuries. He brushed his nose through Aaron's damp hair, then kissed his jaw. "Aaron."

Aaron drew a deep breath and let it out, stroking his fingers down Dave's side. He felt a little like talking again now that they were relaxed, but decided it was best not to. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Dave said quietly. He buried his face against Aaron's neck for a moment, breathing in his scent. "I could have lost you," he whispered. "I _nearly_ lost you."

"I know," Aaron whispered. "I know. I'm such an idiot."

"You are not," Dave replied, and kissed him again. "You're the smartest man I know. Well, except for Reid." He pulled back a little and pressed his forehead to Aaron's cheek. "I just can't stand the thought of..." He sighed. "Aaron, this is stupid. We want each other. We want _this_. And maybe you still need to find yourself, but I can't let you keep holding me at arm's length. I can't take that chance."

"That's what I meant," Aaron said. "Why-- I could-- either one of us." He lifted his head to kiss Dave, trying to make his point clear in action.

Dave kissed him back hard, channeling all his desire and frustration into the kiss. He needed this. They _both_ needed this. And he was through taking 'wait' for an answer. He was glad Aaron had realized it, too.

Aaron hadn't even realized when he decided this was okay, but it was hitting him hard now. Why should he 'learn how to be alone' when it just meant being lonely, and either of them could die any moment? He sifted his hands through Dave's hair and deepened the kiss with a little moan.

_Good._ Dave stroked a hand along Aaron's side, his tongue tangling hungrily with Aaron's. He didn't want to push for more than Aaron wanted tonight, but he wasn't going to hide how he felt. He wanted to remind Aaron they were alive.

"Dave," Aaron murmured, breathless when the kiss broke. "I'm sorry. If I'd died..."

"I would have never forgiven you," Dave whispered. "God. You _can't_ die on me, Aaron. I need you too fucking much." He trailed kisses along Aaron's jaw, his breathing ragged with emotion he was trying to keep inside. He didn't need to fall apart. He didn't have to fall apart. It was over. Aaron was safe. They were together.

"I can't promise that, but I'm sorry," Aaron murmured, pulling Dave closer. He wanted Dave on top of him, but Dave had to take the initiative on that so Aaron wouldn't wind up hurting more.

Dave rolled obediently over Aaron when he pulled, holding his weight carefully so he would rest only lightly against Aaron's body. "You're forgiven," he breathed, kissing him softly. He smiled faintly and traced his fingers through Aaron's hair, his kisses growing less hungry and more tender.

Aaron whimpered softly, feeling connected, and his body ached, but _wanted_ too. "I need this," he whispered between kisses. "Need you."

Dave smiled and hummed. "I've told you before," he murmured, sliding a knee between Aaron's legs, "I want to always give you anything you need."

*****

Dave woke slowly the next morning, feeling warm and calm. He was lying on his back, Aaron pressed against his side with an arm draped over Dave's stomach. He had a quiet sense of victory, despite the horrible way things had happened on this case. Aaron had said yes to him. Finally, the pieces of Dave's life felt like they were where they belonged.

Aaron had not slept well. The warmth that had washed over him after he and Dave had made love--and there was no question that making love was what they'd done--hadn't lasted long, and Aaron had listened to the sound of Dave's breath settling. After Dave was asleep, Aaron spent a good number of hours trying to join him before eventually giving up on sleep. It had come after a while though, filled with things he didn't want to think about, and when Dave shifted against him, Aaron was almost glad for wakefulness, in spite of how his eyes didn't want to open and his body ached worse than the day before. He shifted against Dave and let out a long groan of pain before settling again.

"Aaron," Dave murmured, turning his head and kissing Aaron's forehead. He knew Aaron had had a fitful night, but he wasn't going to call attention to it. He just stroked a hand up Aaron's back and didn't say anything.

"Ugh," Aaron groaned and shifted against Dave. "Need something; be right back," he whispered, shifting to go get the painkillers he knew would be on the bathroom counter.

"Mmm." Dave didn't move much, though he opened his eyes to watch Aaron walk away. He wondered if he could get away with ordering room service, or if Aaron was expecting to go down to the restaurant for breakfast with the team.

Aaron took the painkillers and leaned against the counter, looking over the bruises on his body. It felt both good and bad to move, though he knew he had to so he didn't get too stiff. He walked back out to look at Dave, drawing a hand absently over one of the bruises. He sighed and settled back down against Dave. "I dare you to tell me this isn't the sexiest I've ever looked," he joked, but he sounded a little miserable anyway.

"You could make polka-dot boxers and blue hair look sexy," Dave said. He slid his hands lightly over Aaron's skin. "I hate seeing you look so vulnerable," he admitted after a while. "I feel like I should have done more to watch your back."

"Oh, God, Dave," Aaron muttered. He didn't like being told he looked _vulnerable_ , and wishing things would have been different was useless. "Don't do that. I'm fine, and you were doing what you were supposed to be doing. I wouldn't have let you 'watch my back' anyway."

Dave laughed softly. "It doesn't matter how many times you tell me we're not partners, you'll never be able to make me stop thinking of you that way. And if my partner gets hurt, it still feels like my fault, even if I know I couldn't have changed it."

Aaron looked up at Dave. He didn't feel the same way, exactly. He'd been part of the team for too long before Dave came back, but he could understand that Dave felt that way. He'd been Aaron's partner back when Aaron was new at the BAU for far longer than he'd been on the team now. Aaron smiled and brushed his fingers along Dave's jaw. "Have I ever told you what an idiot you are?" he murmured, his tone affectionate.

"Frequently and loudly," Dave replied, smiling at him. He tightened his arms briefly, gazing at Aaron.

Aaron leaned up to kiss Dave, slowly, then pulled away just enough to whisper against Dave's lips. "I don't feel like I should say this now. It's not a stress reaction, but it feels that way, and I don't want you to think... Dave," he breathed, then kissed Dave again. "I love you. I loved you fifteen years ago; I knew that, and everything changed, but it didn't go away. And I didn't get... to tell Kate..." He trailed off and stopped. He knew Kate had to have known he cared, but he'd been too busy working and then trying to save her that he hadn't actually said it-- _ever_ \--and now he was going to have to live with that.

Dave shivered and ran his fingers through Aaron's hair soothingly. "She knew," he said softly. " _I_ knew. But it's so fucking good to hear you admit it." He kissed Aaron, tenderly and thoroughly.

Aaron deepened the kiss and then groaned at the way he shifted to do it. When he pulled away, he settled against Dave's shoulder again, feeling a little vulnerable, but relieved.

Dave stroked his hands over Aaron's skin, holding him close. Aaron's actions last night had spoken for him, but something about hearing those words settled a deep joy in Dave's soul. He closed his eyes, hands still roaming comfortingly. "I love you," he whispered quietly, his fingers sliding through Aaron's hair.

Aaron's heart squeezed. He knew that Dave loved him, but it was nice to hear it when Dave was sober. It was a _relief_ to hear it when he knew he could return it. Aaron drew a deep breath, ignoring how his ribs ached, this kissed Dave's neck. "Thank you," he whispered.

"You should have known that by now," Dave said, but he was smiling. He didn't bother to add that he'd loved Aaron for years and would love him for the rest of their lives, but he thought that was fairly obvious by now.

They didn't go down for breakfast, and Aaron knew he should kick Dave out so no one would catch on that Dave wasn't in his room, but Aaron couldn't bring himself to do it. He wanted to stay in bed with Dave all day. Of course it would be better in Dave's personal bed, but getting there meant a long drive home, which Aaron wasn't looking forward to. Eventually, though, they had to get up, and Hotch went about getting ready, which took twice as long as usual.

Dave was glad Aaron let himself stay in bed late, though he knew Aaron felt a little awkward about Dave leaving his hotel room. Particularly in the same clothes he'd had on the night before. He carried both Aaron's and his luggage down to the lobby and checked them out while Aaron was on the phone with Strauss.

The lobby was where Morgan found him. Dave didn't know and didn't really care what Morgan knew or guessed about him and Aaron. Morgan asked how Hotch was, then asked if it was all right if he drove him back to Quantico. Dave figured getting things straightened out with Morgan would make Aaron feel better, so he shrugged and said it wouldn't be a problem. He didn't like leaving Aaron, but it was for the best.

All the same, the flight home seemed quicker than usual and the wait at the office longer than usual, since he ended up doing a lot of catch-up paperwork waiting around for Aaron and Morgan to get in.

The drive back to Quantico seemed exceedingly long. Morgan had obviously expected Aaron to be grateful that he was driving, and after Aaron had flat out told him how he felt, neither of them really said much. Every once in a while, Morgan would open his mouth, and Aaron would shift to face the window a little more. It was possibly childish, but Aaron was angry and in no mood to fight it, and avoiding the issue was better than winding up shouting at Morgan in the car.

When they got back to the BAU, they walked in and parted without a word, and Aaron headed to his office. Then took a detour when he saw Dave's light on. Everyone else on the team had come and gone already, and Aaron did his best to ignore the way Morgan was watching him as he stepped into Dave's office. "What are you still doing here?" he murmured.

Dave looked up and smiled. "Waiting for you," he said. "And catching up on a lot of stuff that I've been neglecting. How was the drive back?"

"Quiet." Aaron looked back over his shoulder and saw Morgan look away. "Deathly." He walked into the room and looked at Dave. "You should have gone home. You're tired too, and you're not as young as you used to be," he said, trying to sound joking, but only managing to sound tired.

"Hey. I resent that." Dave glanced over at Morgan. "Things with you and Derek didn't work out?"

Aaron shook his head. "There's nothing to work out," he said sincerely.

"Is that so." Dave looked back at Aaron, then shrugged. "Well, I'm ready to head home if you are. My place or yours?"

Aaron watched Dave for a moment, and then said, "Yours." His own house still felt like his and Haley's house, no matter how long she'd been gone.

Dave nodded and stood up. "I'll see you there soon, right?" He wasn't entirely sure Aaron should be driving, but he wasn't about to say anything about it, after the unpleasant trip Aaron had obviously had from New York.

Aaron nodded, and started out of the office. He didn't feel like driving, really, but he didn't want to admit it. They were half-way down to the bullpen before Aaron decided to just bite the bullet and ask. It really shouldn't be so hard to ask. Not with Dave. "Actually," he said slowly. "I was hoping you'd drive."

"Okay." Dave smiled at him and stuck his hands in his pockets. "I should pick up some milk on the way home. Mine's probably gone bad." He shot a glance at Morgan, who was at his desk trying not to look like he was watching.

"Are you asking for my permission, or telling me?" Aaron said, purposely ignoring the exchange of looks between Dave and Morgan as they walked past Morgan towards the elevators.

Dave shrugged. "Just letting you know, if you want cereal in the morning, we need to stop for milk."

"You're not going to make me pancakes?" Aaron asked, and managed to smile at Dave. "I don't really care what we eat tomorrow morning, or if we eat at all," he added quietly.

"Well, at some point we'll need to eat," Dave said. "But if you don't care about milk, I don't either. Let's go home and go to bed."

Aaron nodded, and once the elevator doors were shut behind him, he pressed his hand to the small of Dave's back. "He knows," he murmured, nudging Dave closer.

Dave shrugged. "He doesn't seem to care." He wondered if Morgan had said something, or if Aaron was just guessing.

Aaron shook his head. "That's beside the point." Oddly, Aaron couldn't bring himself to feel too uncomfortable about it, and _that_ was what was making him the most uncomfortable. Of course, it was more than likely that he was simply too tired to react the way he should be reacting.

"What is the point, then?" Dave asked, resting a hand on Aaron's hip and looking at him.

"I don't know," Aaron admitted. "Too many things to think about right now," he said, and looked down at Dave.

Dave shrugged. "They'll all figure it out eventually, Aaron," he said, his voice low. "I don't have a problem with that, but I understand if you do."

Aaron sighed and shifted so that he was leaning very slightly against Dave. "I wish I wasn't supposed to have a problem with it," he said after a long pause.

Dave lifted his head to kiss Aaron briefly. "Well. We'll burn that bridge when we come to it."

Aaron returned the kiss and nodded. "Okay." He reached up to brush his fingertips along Dave's jaw and opened his mouth, but the elevator was slowing, so he just shifted away and started out through the doors when they opened.

Dave pushed down the flutter of anxiety Aaron's words had woken in him. After all, Aaron was the SAC, and he did have to be concerned about things like that, but they would work something out. He just caught up with Aaron and led the way to his truck.

Their drive to his apartment was quiet. They were both exhausted, and Dave suspected Aaron was in pain, as well. Shithead came running to greet them when Dave unlocked the apartment door, and to Dave's amusement, the cat spent the majority of its time twining around Aaron's ankles and purring loudly. He wondered if Aaron could hear the purr.

Aaron greeted the cat with a 'hello, cat' that had become habit, then nudged it away enough not to step on it. It followed him when he went to the kitchen for a glass of water though, and when he settled at the edge of Dave's bed after brushing his teeth with the toothbrush in his ready bag and pulling off everything but his undershirt and boxers, it hopped into his lap again. When Dave walked in, Aaron had his hand on its back, the vibration of the cat's body going through it. "Apparently, you're sleeping on the couch."

Dave laughed. "I guess we're destined to have others come between us forever," he said, and ran his fingers tenderly through Aaron's hair. "You know, there's a large number of people who believe that the feline purr has a healing property. Some people even believe cats can just _tell_ when we're in pain." He gave Shithead a speculative look and flipped off the overhead light, leaving just the bedside lamps on as he climbed into bed.

Aaron closed his eyes at the touch, and then snorted. "You've been spending far too much time with Reid. Remind me to pair you up with Morgan for a while." The mention of Morgan made Aaron's stomach clench, but he just pushed the cat off his lap and climbed back onto the bed next to Dave.

Dave laughed again and pulled Aaron into his arms. "Just wait. You'll wake up with him curled up against you and purring." This felt good. The New York case had been hell, but at least it had made Aaron admit that he belonged with Dave.

"It wouldn't be the first time," Aaron murmured, trying to take comfort in this. He thought back to when Dave had been hurt when Aaron was new to the BAU, and he spent several nights with the cat curled up at his stomach; when Dave had come back, they'd kissed the first time. Aaron smiled softly and kissed Dave's throat.

"Mmm." Dave stroked his fingers through Aaron's hair again. "You know, my cat's never liked anyone as much as he likes you." He smiled.

"Maybe he knows how much you like me," Aaron replied, shifting to a more comfortable position under Dave's arm.

"Probably," Dave said, his smile widening. He kissed Aaron softly. "He knows how happy you make me."

"Mmm, shut up and go to sleep," Aaron murmured affectionately.

Dave laughed and closed his eyes.

*****

Aaron could tell by the way Dave looked at him the first time they were alone in Lower Canaan that Dave was _not_ happy that Aaron had returned to work. Aaron was, quite honestly, shocked that the doctor had signed his release back to work at all, but he wasn't going to complain, and to Dave's credit, he didn't say a word. The ringing and buzzing didn't really ever stop, but it was manageable most of the time, at least it was until several guns went off around him at the same time when their unsub decided to commit suicide by cop and Aaron's ear and head exploded with pain.

Dave was there, holding Aaron as much as he dared in front of the team, and Aaron couldn't do anything to stop the pain or even protest Dave's obvious protective gesture. 

He supposed that Dave decided his pain had been punishment enough too, because when Aaron returned to the hotel later that night, Dave didn't lecture him. Dave _did_ , later, order him to "stretch out" his trip home, though, and there was no question Dave meant it as an order no matter how he stated it. After experiencing first hand just how badly his injury could affect him, Aaron was finally willing to admit defeat and take a break.

The trip actually took several days longer than it should have when Aaron decided to go further south than necessary. He spent a few days in a hotel in Georgia so he could visit Jack; Haley was still living with her mother, having not decided where she wanted to settle. When Aaron finally got back to Virginia, he was in a better mood for the visit, even if enduring his ex-wife to see his child had been uncomfortable.

He went home to grab fresh clothes and necessities, and then headed directly to Dave's knowing Dave wouldn't mind letting him stay for a few days until he was _really_ cleared to return to work.

Things at the BAU had been running fairly smoothly without Aaron, but Dave wasn't under any illusions; he knew it was because the team was used to Aaron's unobtrusive style of leadership, and they were being charitable enough to overlook Dave's mis-steps as he tried to emulate that. It didn't come naturally to him--he was used to giving orders and having them carried out--but he couldn't deny that the team functioned better the way Aaron did things.

All the same, he was relieved on a professional level as well as a personal one when he opened his door and found Aaron standing there with a bag over his shoulder. He smiled broadly and stood aside so Aaron could come in. "Back in town finally." His voice was warm.

"Yeah," Aaron murmured, and waited for the door to shut before reaching up to touch Dave's face. "Is my team still in one piece?"

Dave wrapped his arms around Aaron and kissed him hungrily. "Of course it is, you Doubting Thomas."

Aaron hummed into the kiss, returning it fully, then pulled away just enough to look down at Dave. "Morgan didn't go to New York?" he asked, unsure exactly why, but the transfer situation had still been up in the air when Aaron had left.

"He wouldn't like the politics of running a field office," Dave said. He stroked his hand idly over Aaron's back. "Anyway, he said there wasn't anywhere he'd rather be than the BAU. He respects you more than anyone, you know."

Aaron shook his head. "He clearly doesn't, underneath what even he thinks," he said, then pressed his lips together and leaned against Dave. "I wanted to bring Jack back with me," he said, changing the subject.

"You should have," Dave murmured. "You won't be ready to go back to work just yet. Haley could have come to pick him up when you're back in the office." He kissed Aaron's forehead. "Come sit down," he suggested, nudging Aaron toward the couch.

Aaron let Dave guide him. "I'm not sure he's ready for the likes of you yet," he teased, and settled next to Dave. He wasn't going to keep that he was close to Dave from Jack, though he had no intention of being obvious about their relationship just yet. Not that Jack would really understand now anyway, but Aaron hadn't been able to help considering how he should handle this, and he knew that introducing the idea sooner rather than later was a good idea, even if he didn't think it was quite time yet.

Dave snorted. "Hey, I know how to be nice to kids. I have nieces and nephews." He stroked his fingers lightly along Aaron's leg. "Just because I didn't have any of my own doesn't mean I don't know how to behave myself."

Aaron smiled and leaned over to kiss Dave. "I'm ready to work," he said softly, but he knew it wasn't going to happen right way, so he immediately conceded. "Maybe I'll see if they'll let me fly them out." Not that he wanted Haley here, but Jack couldn't fly alone, and he wasn't sure asking Haley to fly to Virginia, then back alone, then back to pick up Jack, then back to Georgia was exactly fair.

Dave tried to hide his distaste for that suggestion. "She hasn't been unreasonable about you seeing Jack, has she?" Aaron hadn't said so any of the times they'd talked on the phone, but Dave wasn't sure how much Aaron was still in the habit of protecting Haley from censure.

"No," Aaron said truthfully. "She'll get custody," he said, and that still caused a little ache in Aaron's chest, but he knew that his lifestyle prevented him from being constant enough to share custody on any kind of regular basis. "But she has no intention of keeping him from me. She told me I should visit more often, actually." It had been an awkward, uncomfortable suggestion, but Aaron had appreciated it anyway.

"Good." Dave sighed and kissed Aaron's cheek, then buried his nose in Aaron's hair. "I'm sorry she took him so far away," he murmured. "It's got to be awful not getting to see him more often."

Aaron sighed and settled closer to Dave, knowing there was really nothing he could say to that to make it seem better that wouldn't have been a lie.

Dave hummed, holding Aaron tightly. He had missed being able to touch Aaron while they were apart. It was almost amusing how quickly Dave was adjusting to having Aaron in every part of his life. He thought about the mess in his guest bedroom, where he'd spent the afternoon going through a bunch of old things and deciding what to get rid of and what to keep. He'd started thinking maybe he should get a bigger apartment--one that would have a room for Aaron's things, maybe a desk so he could have a study here. He didn't suppose Aaron would want to officially move in together, but it would be nice if they both had their own space.

"Have you eaten?" It was still early in the evening; maybe Aaron would feel like going out for dinner. Dave would need a quick shower first, since he'd been working, but he felt like getting out of the apartment.

Aaron looked up at Dave and kissed him softly. "I was thinking about that when I went home, actually." He stroked Dave's cheek and then sat back, stretching a bit. "Let's go out."

Dave nodded, pleased. "Give me ten minutes to shower. I've been cleaning all afternoon." You can spend the time bonding with Shithead." He grinned and headed back to get cleaned up. Fifteen minutes later he was clean and dressed in jeans and a button-down shirt and came out to the living room.

The cat hadn't actually been in the living room, but when the shower went on, Aaron stretched out on the couch, and it was as if the cat suddenly just knew it. Aaron was pounced almost immediately after he rested back. When Dave came back out, Aaron was actually starting to doze, the soft vibrations of Shithead on his chest relaxing him. He opened his eyes and smiled softly at Dave. "Do you remember when I said I'd buy you a steak when I was ready to make an honest man out of you?" he murmured.

Dave smiled slowly. "Seems like I do remember some sort of conversation like that," he said. He leaned against the wall, looking down at his lover and his cat.

Aaron closed his eyes a moment and sighed, then pushed the cat off his chest. He wiped uselessly at the cat hair on his chest when he got up. "We're going to have to talk about this shedding thing," he murmured at the cat as it walked away, then he looked up at Dave. "Ready?"

_More than ready_ , Dave thought, but he just nodded and held out a hand. "Whenever you are."

Aaron's lips curled into a small smile at the offered hand. He took it and tugged Dave toward the door.


End file.
